SOD.229

Lone Wolf Wins! Lone Wolf Wins! Theeeeeeeeeee Lone Wolf Wins!

In a landslide, 100% of you have decided to take our Lone Wolf from mouse to man and kick the Brawl Brothers in their well-protected groins. Whipping our spear out from ... now that I think of it, where does the well-heeled warrior stash a six-foot length of metal-tipped death when sauntering about town?

Anyway. Whipping our spear out from its undisclosed location, we launch ourselves into bloody combat. With a +7 combat skill differential, this ought to be a cakewalk. Twirling my pencil confidently, I close my eyes and stab the "Random Number Table" and get ... a one. Suddenly I'm flashing back to my D&D days, when people from hundreds of miles away would come to me when they needed a blown dice roll. I was a legend.

That means we inflict seven points of damage to the Trouble Triplets, but take a savage backslash ourselves for four points. Ouch!

The next round goes better as I "point" a seven, meaning we completely avoid danger while inflicting fourteen in return. By my math that kills two of the blighters, leaving only Captain Stripy Drawers. Third time pays for all as I earn a six, gutting him for twelve points while taking a paltry one.

We are triumphant! It was a bit of a costly battle, losing us five total precious hit points, but we have finally washed the stink of cowardice from our karmic reputation. Also, we'll probably never be welcome in this particular tavern again, but such is the cost of victory. Maybe we can convince the mice that the time has come to overthrow their evil human overlords and start running the place themselves.

Regardless, I eagerly await the impassioned embrace of the lusty and grateful tavern wench as our reward!

Feh. Never a lusty tavern wench around when one is required. I hope we at least took the striped codpiece as both a souvenir and fashion accessory, because that thing is awesome.

So what now, intrepid adventurers? Head on out to our rendezvous, or try to play Columbo and track down the killer?

[polldaddy poll="5065202"]

Nobody messes with the mouse, Goofy

When last we left our Lone Wolf cub, we were deciding how best to impress the locals. We settled on the Mickey Mouse approach:

Good to know that if this whole "Cowering Adventurer" schtick doesn't work out, we have a future in the flea circus. "Step right up, folks, and see the amazing Mouse Tamer!" I wonder where we can get a tiny chair and whip ...

Anyway, no good deed goes unpunished, as we soon see:

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You want to base a whole COMIC on this?!

SOD.228

HM3: Isn’t it Ionic?

I've just posted an update to the Background-Standard set for HeroMachine 3 with Myro's prize for winning Caption Contest 98. He requested an Ionic Greek column, which I then broke into pieces. I have to say, I'm curious what crazy uses you all come up with for the various bits.

Thanks for picking a great, useful item, Myro!

Printable character stands and customizable dice

The indispensable and incredible Hammerknight has put together a truly inspired set of items you can import into HeroMachine to enhance your tabletop RPGs even more. I've posted them all over on the UGO forums, but wanted to be sure and add a post pointing to them here as well.

He's got printable and loadable templates for d4, d6, d8, and d20; round and square flat character bases; and both A-frame and tri-fold character stands.

Here are a few samples by Hammerknight of the kinds of things you can do with these really nifty tools. Please drop him a line of thanks for all his hard work, and if you end up using any of these in your campaign I'd sure love to hear about it. Enjoy!



Encephalitis is NOT a super power

Look, I get that Canada sometimes suffers from "Little Brother Syndrome", the feeling that their bigger sibling to the south is constantly picking on them. But it's awfully hard to resist the urge when we see someone like "Smart Alec" gracing their funnybook pages:

Stealing your mom's galoshes, sealing them with duct tape, then filling them with air does not make you a super hero. Nor does gold-plating your uncle's "Butt Head" hat. However, given that this guy is kind of a wuss, I have to applaud his decision to color-coordinate his purple Depends with the rest of his jammies.

As lame as his outfit is, though, it's actually trumped by his history. From the Marvel Database:

When the battle was completed, Shaman shrunk Thorne's body to the size of a toy and stored him in the pouch, hoping to one day find a way to restore his mind.

Thorne's body was later used by Walter Langkowski to escape from transdimensional space. Langkowski's soul took over the body and escaped from the pouch. After escaping the pouch, the miniature body was crushed when the Box robot fell on it.

You are reading that correctly. He was shrunk to the size of a toy, stored in a pouch, and eventually crushed when a Box fell on him. It's hard to have a more ignoble super career than that, folks.

(Many thanks to Myro for pointing this one out to me.)

HM3: Ren boot

Oops, I forgot one of dblade's other submissions, now in FootRight-MaleStandard, a cool Renaissance boot:

HM3: Spiky-eyed Jungle Colonel

dblade is back once again with some excellent additions to the HM3 stable of items, now available. They are:

Long-requested epaulettes for military uniforms, in ShoulderRight-Standard:

A nifty earring gauge good for gritty urban dwellers and savage jungle tribespeople both, in Ears-Standard:

And finally, a set of super-long-lashed eyes (in Eyes-Standard) and a flesh-embedded spike (ShoulderRight-Standard -- that seems like a weird place but that's where the other single spikes are):

Thanks, dblade!

I'm also working on more of the nifty Chinese Zodiacs sent in by MMI, and Hammerknight's amazing "assemble your own custom dice" codes.