Category Archives: Lone Wolf: Fire on the Water


We left our intrepid Lone Wolf Cub dithering in the cabin of his ship's captain while a fire raged in the hold, pondering whether to search the cabin or follow the leader upstairs. By almost a two-to-one margin, we have apparently decided our adventurer is the Straight Arrow type. Thus, up to the deck we go:

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To pilfer or pursue

Our little Lone Wolf Cub was last seen facing a wall of smoke issuing from the belowdecks hatch of his very flammable ocean-going vessel. Faced with the decision to run to the nearest Daddy Figure for help or to charge into the very teeth of danger, you can guess which way we went:

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There be pirates here!

Emboldened both by our defeat of the Codpieced Cohort and by our domination of the tavern rats, we chose to set out in search of the killers of our intended contact:

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Lone Wolf Wins! Lone Wolf Wins! Theeeeeeeeeee Lone Wolf Wins!

In a landslide, 100% of you have decided to take our Lone Wolf from mouse to man and kick the Brawl Brothers in their well-protected groins. Whipping our spear out from ... now that I think of it, where does the well-heeled warrior stash a six-foot length of metal-tipped death when sauntering about town?

Anyway. Whipping our spear out from its undisclosed location, we launch ourselves into bloody combat. With a +7 combat skill differential, this ought to be a cakewalk. Twirling my pencil confidently, I close my eyes and stab the "Random Number Table" and get ... a one. Suddenly I'm flashing back to my D&D days, when people from hundreds of miles away would come to me when they needed a blown dice roll. I was a legend.

That means we inflict seven points of damage to the Trouble Triplets, but take a savage backslash ourselves for four points. Ouch!

The next round goes better as I "point" a seven, meaning we completely avoid danger while inflicting fourteen in return. By my math that kills two of the blighters, leaving only Captain Stripy Drawers. Third time pays for all as I earn a six, gutting him for twelve points while taking a paltry one.

We are triumphant! It was a bit of a costly battle, losing us five total precious hit points, but we have finally washed the stink of cowardice from our karmic reputation. Also, we'll probably never be welcome in this particular tavern again, but such is the cost of victory. Maybe we can convince the mice that the time has come to overthrow their evil human overlords and start running the place themselves.

Regardless, I eagerly await the impassioned embrace of the lusty and grateful tavern wench as our reward!

Feh. Never a lusty tavern wench around when one is required. I hope we at least took the striped codpiece as both a souvenir and fashion accessory, because that thing is awesome.

So what now, intrepid adventurers? Head on out to our rendezvous, or try to play Columbo and track down the killer?

Nobody messes with the mouse, Goofy

When last we left our Lone Wolf cub, we were deciding how best to impress the locals. We settled on the Mickey Mouse approach:

Good to know that if this whole "Cowering Adventurer" schtick doesn't work out, we have a future in the flea circus. "Step right up, folks, and see the amazing Mouse Tamer!" I wonder where we can get a tiny chair and whip ...

Anyway, no good deed goes unpunished, as we soon see:

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Discpline, my friends, always DISCIPLINE

When last we left our rapidly-maturing Lone Wolf, he had been accosted outside a dockside tavern by persons unknown. After hasty consultation with the Powers of the Outer Dark (that's us), the decision was made to try and pull away rather than introducing him to the finely honed edge of our blade. Thus:

Looking over the list of possibilities, I regret that we do not have the Kai Discipline of "Sticking Him With the Check", as that would be a lot of fun. We also lack the Kai Disciplines of Healing and Mind Over Matter -- is that because we're completely self-centered and not too bright? -- so we're left with the following choices:

So we can try to turn his brain to goo, we can whip out our spear (quite the trick in a crowded tavern), or we can (presumably) chit chat with the disgusting rodents currently consuming what is likely the only edible portions in the entire establishment. Perhaps we could try to recreate the Monty Python "Cheese Shop" sketch and guess what cheesy comestible they're currently serving their rodential clientele! No? Oh well, to business.

Let us know what you'd choose and why, fellow Outer Darkies!

And for those of you uninterested in propelling our unwitting dupe through his life paces, here's the aforementioned sketch for your edification and entertainment.

Lone Wolf, the Tavern Years

The stage has been set for the dramatic return and continued question of Kai, the Lone Wolf! We decided on adding a chainmail coat (+4END) and a Healing Potion (+4 END) to our inventory from the King's armory. Thanks to some kind of oversight from yours truly, unfortunately the "Which Kai Discipline" poll didn't go live, so I'm just going to make a command decision and, based on Myro's suggestion, we're taking Hunting.

You can see our full character sheet here.

And now, onward!

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The Return of the Lone Wolf!

Our last foray into the world of the Lone Wolf didn't end all that well -- we got kilt. Kilt dead.

But never fear! If a life of geeky comic book nerdery has taught us anything, it's that no one has to stay dead forever. With that spirit, today I kick off Book 2 of the Lone Wolf, "Fire on the Water", courtesy of Project Aon! It's a fantastic site dedicated to preserving and sharing the legacy of "Choose Your Own Adventure" style books, and will be the source of our new foray.

For the sake of continuity, we'll say that when our little wee Kai Lord in training seemed to die, in fact he was snatched into an alternate dimension where Spider-Man has another new costume he actually lived to complete the quest to find the king and warn him of impending danger, whereupon he was given a new quest:

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