Because I wanted to give everyone considering a "Friday Nights 3" entry an extra week to work on their submissions (remember, due Thursday!), and in honor of this being "International Talk Like a Pirate Day", we're running another Caption Contest this week instead of a character design challenge.
Thus, your scurvy challenge this week, ye salty sea dog, is to come up with the best replacement dialog for this comics panel or be keel-hauled!:
I don't know what kind of ship he's on with that pink skull emblem but I feel sure we'll find out.
The best entry (as judged by yours truly) wins the author's choice of either any item they like or any portrait to be included in HeroMachine 3′s final release, or a custom black and white “Sketch of the Day” style illustration (you pick the subject, I draw it however I like).
All entries must be left as a comment (or comments) to this post. Keep ‘em clean (appropriate for a late-night broadcast TV show), but most importantly, keep ‘em funny!
This week we have a cap of no more than five (5) entries per person, so make 'em your best!
Whaddaya mean the Village People auditions were yesterday!?!
You ninjas get off me ship! ARRR!
Fetch me mustache trimmer!
1) I was Captain Jack Sparrows date to prom.
2)I am what I am, and that’s all that I am, I’m a gay pirateman.
3)Hmm am I Cher or Lady Gaga today
4)I am the Queen of the 7 seas
5)I have Davey Jones Locket
1. I take my hat off for one thing, one thing only.
2. Well, go girl, go!
3. Lady you’re about half bubble off plumb, and that’s fer sure and certain.
4. Bring me my brown pants!
5. I may look like Tom Selleck or Burt Reynolds, but I’m still captain of the Pink Pearl!
1) Arrrrr! I wiped with my hook again!
2) How dare ye insult me porn ‘stache?!
3) Gaaaaarrrr! ‘Eureka’ be cancelled? But that Felicia Day lass be so fetching!
4) I mean ta make them Netflix scallywags walk the plank fer their mutinous comportment!
5) Excuse me, but I am offended by your frivolous generalizations. I am not a “pirate.” I am a privateer, thank you.
“Where’s me moustache wax, ye scurvy sea dogs? WHERE???”
1. Me? I’m LeChuck’s long lost brother LePh… do I have to spell it out for you?
2. It’s GUYbrush Threepwood? Oops, sorry, wrong ship.
@LeftyFPB: monkey island, ftw!
Fear the mighty captain limp wrist of the booty pirates!
1. Well blow me… um down!
2. Arg! Fabulous!
3. Let’s go boys! Wait, are those showtunes?
4. Raid! Pilfer! Makeover!
All you can eat shrimp? Set sail to the Red Lobster, maties!!
I LOVE INVISIBLE RUM!
Damn ye to Davey Jones’ Locker! The rum be gone again!
Welcome aboard the S.S. ss-aaaa-ffff-eeee-tttt-yyyy
Hand over the Black Pearl! It’d go great with my white gold earing
All me movies be rated arrrrrh!
How dare ye call me oversexual, just ask me crew – Master Bates and Rodger the Cabin Boy
1. Yes I be havin’ a pink skull on me hat! So what?!
1. I wouldn’t call me-self gay, but I’d surely swab your poop deck.
2. All these seamen…I just don’t know what to do.
3. 100 men go out to sea. 50 couples come back to harbor.
4. I’ll be taking your treasure AND your booty, YARRGH!
5. Tis not gay unless you enjoy it.
1. “Gyar! I’ll get that blasted Cap’n Crunch recipe some day!”
2. “Curse those meddlin’ kids and their stupid dog!”
3. “And ye best cut me hair to look like Marilyn Monroe!”
1) Do what you want, cause a pirate is free! You gyar a PIRATE!
1. “What the…alright, who’s the scurvy dog what replaced my jolly rodger pin with a flower skull?”
Go West, Jim Lad! Ha Haaarrr!!
“Ack! Who be drinkin’ me invisible beer!?”
“I’ll gut ye with me blade, ye scalliwa-Where’s me blade!??”
“I be quite the fashionable buccaneer.”
“Up next on Queer Eye for the Straight Pirate…”
1) I be Commander Morgan, the Cap’n’s little brother!
2) As ye c’n see, I got more’n a little Cap’n in me!
3) Aaarrrrgh! Me “pirate sense” be tinglin’, someone’s comin’ at us from behind!
1. Shiver me timbers! A fortnight past Labor Day, and here I be wearing me white gloves like a scurvy ‘lubber.
1)Flower Power, bitches
2)I’m on a quest for booty, if you know what I mean.
“Yellowbeard beat me to it!”
“Long John Silver ain’t got nothin’ on me!”
“Me milkshake brings all th’boys to th’deck…”
“Curse you, Aquaman!!”
“Cabin boy, drop ye pantaloons! It be time for me scurvy cure!”
4) By the power o’ Flower Skull!!!
5) How dare ye make fun o’ me Quaker Oats costume!
Ye call me gay do ye?
The weathergirls were right! It’s raining men!
“STRIKE YER COLOURS, YE BLOOMIN’ COCKROACHES!”
WHO ARRRRRRRRRE “RED DAWN”?
Arrrgh! who put this stickerrr on me hat?
“Blast! I’ve been shot! Tell my ‘wife’ I love him.”
“ENEMY PIRATES?! Wait, what kind be they? ’cause depending on your answer this is either really good or really bad.”
“Which’ a you scally wags put a flower and pink skull on me best hat?!?!
1. “Brandy, you’re a fine girl. What a good wife you would be. But my life, my lover, my lady, is the sea.”
1. Shiver me timbers and minnie me pearls!
2. Aye, white gloves after Labor Day!
3. I hear rushing water in me ear…
4. Y-M-C… Argh!
5. ‘Tis me J. Edgar Hoover costume, laddie!
1) The steering wheel? It drives me nuts!
2) Me ring’s in me RIGHT ear, lass, move along!
3) Wear yer flowerskull if’n ye know someone what died from the AIDs.
4) Ow! Use more lube back there, ye scurvy dog!
5) See here? Dust from on top o’ yer cabin door’s frame!
Fifty lashes fer the swine!
1. Yes, we are THOSE kinds of pirates. . .
2. Tonight me hardies! We drink and dance– TO LADY GAGA!
1.WHERE’S MY CONTACTS!
2.We be the butt-pirates of the carribian!
3.Aye, swab my poop-deck, you land-lubbers!
4.I be gaying up the ocean!
5.WHERE’S MY OTHER EARRING!!
Aaaarrrrr! So what if it be Talk Like A Pirate Day? I always be talkin’ like this!
1) they shall learn to fear… the PINK PANSIES!
2) Where is my cabin boy?!?
3) I like big boats and I can not lie!
4) Weigh “MY” anchor lass!
5) This suit does NOTHING for my eyes!
“Hey, everybody! It’s ‘Talk Like An Office Worker Day’ Let’s all enjoy free donuts in the break room!”
Have ye got a lil cap’n in ye? Would you like to?
1. Do you swear to keep the divine secrets of the Argh Argh Sisterhood?
2. Where be me matching fabulous earrings for this hat? And where be my shirley temple?
3. Who replaced me hat with Walk-Funny Joe’s?
Aaarrr! Who ate all’ me Crunch Berries!
1)arrrh I be cuteness! Captain of the hello kitty.
2)It takes a pirate to wear a laddies hat.
3)my Gloves are fabulous but my stash is sensational
4) At last I have found the greatest treasure of sugar spice and everything nice.
5) Fashion police meet your new captain!
1.Arrgh! Not the green dildo! It clashes!
2.No! It’s Kathy Griffin!
3.Where’s me pink gun?!
4.Hide the rum! It’s Jack Sparrow!
5.Shut up! Oprah’s on.
1.What?! They pierced the wrong side?! NOOOOOO!
2.Yar! Pirates don’t say arr!
3. Drink up me hearties! We celebrate Gaga’s birthday!
4.No! Its…ITS SAMSON!! ROW MEN!!!
5. FIRE THE KITTY-CAT CANNONS!!
2. AVAST! Who’s the scurvy dog what dipped me mustache in their ink bottle?
3. Skull and Crossbones be sooo 1600’s. Fer the fashion-forward privateering man of 1710, it’s got ter be the Skull and Daisy.
Arr the Pink Pirate be giving me the Rear Admiral!!
1. HELP! I need a doctor about the barnacles on me’ cannon!
2. Someones pinched me winkle!
3. Myley Cyrus? ARGHHH!
They not be crumbs in my beard, they be scabs from the barnacle on me lip!
I got rainbow stickers on me ship *Happy face*
1. Arrr! Shiver me timbers!
2. Where’s the scurvy dog that dipped me mustache in ink?! Cabin Boy! Bring me my peg leg!
3. Arrr! It’s Mother’s Day, ye scurvy dogs! Start dressin’ like yers…
4. Does this pink skull and flowers match my eyes?
5. Cabin Boy! It’s time to swab the poop deck!
“Jolly Roger? I’ll give a ‘jolly’ to yer ‘roger’.”
1. Yarrr! Smell me flower!
2. Tis I, Captain John Swallow!
3. I swallow Captain John….tis?
4. You’ve seen the Flying Dutchman, now beware…..THE FLAMING FRENCHMAN!
Did I leave the curling iron on?!
Nakiato, NICE Robin Hood Men in Tights reference.
“Maties! Don’t be lookin’ now but a giant sized nerd be starrin’ at ye.”
1) Arr! I be barred from coming within 20,000 leagues of an elementary school!
2)Blimey! Me Jolly Roger be flying at half mast!
2. “Arrgh, I be not a pirate! I’m Bill, from Pink Skull Florist and Delivery!”
The earrings on the wrong ear! It was just a dare matey!
Yes, tis’ a one of a kind Pink Skull button on me hat!
I think the new Somalian pirate look is too mainstream, so I went for a more underground look
Fear me for I am with the “Super Duper Scary Pink Skull Pirate Guys”! The fear strikes deep within the heart with a manly name like that!!
Hey Mr. Artist! What the hell am I wearing!
“Are you ready kids? I cant hear you… Oh! who lives in a pineapple under the sea?”
1. 99 cent fish tacos? Me hearties, the grub and the womens are on me!
2. A toast, boy’o, to the Mary Celeste! May she bring us home safely…
1) Fill the cannons with vodka and fire away!
2) Yarr! I be the captain of Pinkflower!
3) Whad’ya mean we’re out of sugar?!
4) We be the Pink Ponies! All who’s not cute or pink will be made into one!
5) I saw what you did behind the corner! Arr!
1) Arrrr! I don’t even know why we talk like this, it’s
2) Gyaar! I think I be beginning to raise me kraken!
3) Parle? PARLE? THE BLOODY FRENCH!!!!
My second try of the caption contest. I love the pirates arrr.
1. (Censured) ****** ****** ***** ****** ******
2. The Kraken eat my wooden leg arrr.
3. What the hell are doing here vikings?
4. You eat my meat, drink my rum, what would you like next? My shiny hook.
5. Where the bones on the jolly roger, I tell you to paint it.
“But I don’t WANNA be a pirate!”
“Arrr! What be wrong with wearin’ white gloves onboard ship? I may be a pirate, but I’m still a gentleman!”
Arrrgh! Me fingers all be the same size!
This IS my scary pirate-face!
I’ll strangle the land-lubber who stole the blue from my eyes!
ZOMG! Pink AND red? Arg, go change ye clashin’ dog
So, we meet at last Peter Pan…oh wait..CUT!!! CUT!!!
3) Arrr! This cravat be itchy!
Jeff, I understand why you’ve done this and I appreciate it, but I hope you are going to have the Virgo contest this month. I’ve got loads of ideas and I don’t want *all* of them to go to waste (most of them will anyway).
2)Are you accusing me of piracy!?
3)You cut my hair uneven!!
4)My name is not RICKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!
“The LAST klondike bar?! NOOOOO!”
“Surprised? I’m not surprised, that be the botox.”
5) Oh no she didn’t!
6) No need to fear my fat moustache is here!
7)What!? They cancelled American Idol?
yaarh, the monster high girls are suing me for their logo!