Yearly Archives: 2008

I wouldn't call this a "bad super costume" necessarily (although I do wonder why her boots are different sizes and how in the name of all that's spandex her breasts don't come flying out of those metal plate cups), but I am posting it here because I love her name so much.

Slammazon. It just rolls off the tongue, dripping with promise of strong-woman, face-punching, metal-armed awesomeosity. No outfit could measure up to a name that great, so I give Kirby a pass on this one -- she looks good, but according to the laws of physics (or meteorology, I can never remember which) it's literally impossible to design a uniform as glorious as that moniker.

The gigantic pink "SHBOOM" accompanying her entrance is spot-on, though, the only way it could be better is if instead of "SHBOOM" it said (in the same font and color) "SLAMMAZON!". Because a name that good deserves to be both a character and a sound effect.

In 1982, Daryl Hall and John Oates (the Ren and Stimpy of the early 80's pop music scene) recorded a classic song called "Maneater". In 1993, Jack Kirby turned that fabled duo's musical masterpiece into visual form:

Let's mediate for a moment on that epic song's lyrics and reflect on how perfectly this character's non-outfit embodies it:

She'll only come out at night
The lean and hungry type
...
The woman is wild, a she-cat tamed by the purr of a jaguar
...
Oh here she comes
Watch out boy she'll chew you up
Oh here she comes
Shes a maneater
...
I wouldn't if I were you
I know what she can do
Shes deadly man, and she could really rip your world apart
...
Oh here she comes
Watch out boy she'll chew you up
Oh here she comes
Shes a maneater

I cannot imagine a more apt depiction of a "Maneater" than a woman with fang-tipped skulls at breasts and groin. And just look at the seductive evil of her disco-dancing pose; clearly this lady is one wicked customer.

Or maybe she's just misled. Maybe she ordered some edible panties, not realizing that in fact the panties eat you. At least you can be sure that's the last time she buys from "Vlad's of Hollywood".

(Image and character ©1993, Jack Kirby. Song lyrics ©1982 Hall & Oates.)