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Whoever said you couldn't mix roller skates, ninjas, and disco was an America-hating fool, that's what I say, for behold the jaw-dropping awesomeness that is ... Skate Man!
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Posted in Bad Super Costumes, Super-Hero Stuff
Comments Off on Random Panel: Two-Fisted Action
Posted in Daily Random Panel
You can win your very own custom illustration (like this, or this) simply by exercising your wit and humor! In the comments below, enter dialog that should appear for the characters. Keep it suitable for prime time television, make it funny, and just win, baby!
As an example:
Rollerskater1: Yes, I am wearing a disco skating outfit and carrying a purse. Thanks for the directions and ...
Rollerskater2: ... here's your tip. Don't "blow" it all in one place, heh!
Shoe Shine Skater: Thanks!
Good luck everyone!
Comments Off on Caption Contest 4: Roller skates and handgrenades
Posted in Challenges
The winner of Caption Contest 3 is ... Leihaha, with a fashion-dominista GL! Leihaha will now get a free custom black and white illustration (within reason), for this witty dialog:
Well done, and many thanks for all the entrants. Caption Contest 4 will be up momentarily if you want a chance to win your very own professional illustration, so sharpen those funny bones.
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Posted in Challenge Favorites, Challenges
I'm starting a new feature here on the HeroMachine Blog -- a daily Random Panel culled from the pages of the Great Random Comics Horde. I'll be offering them up with no further explanations, for that perfect amount of mind-spraining Zen you've come to expect from me. I hope you enjoy them!
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Posted in Daily Random Panel
This week's "Random Monday Mashup", wherein I take one (and only one) panel from ten randomly chosen comic books to try and make a story, features the adventures of Baja Wally, sex-ed teacher from the future. Plus roller skaters!
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Posted in Mashups
In an effort to prove that bad fashion is indeed timeless, in 1996 DC saw fit to introduce yet another incarnation of The Flash (apparently a hundred and eleven super speedsters is just not enough) -- scientist John Fox from the year 2645:
His logo and those weird yellow triangles that replaced the wings from the original Flash's outfit are actually holographic projections that hover a couple of inches off his skin. I hate them. But not as much as I hate the weird jaggedy red vein/lightning bolts running through the blue and black parts of the uniform. It looks like he's either full of lava, or this close to bleeding out. I also hate his chin strap. I'm not a big fan of those in general, and this one just makes his long, lugubrious face look even more horse-like.
Most of all, though, I hate his huge, bulky, "speed-metal" gauntlets. The beauty of the original Flash costume was its simplicity, with the bold red making the yellow lightning bolt elements really leap out at you. Blue and black don't convey an impression of speed, and with the red cutting crooked lines through the whole thing, it all looks broken up and clunky. The bulbous gauntlets just make it worse.
Overall, this outfit doesn't make me think "oooo, speedy!", it makes me think "oooo, cheap knock-off from the future!" He's even smooching Wally West's girlfriend in this image, as if it's not enough to steal the poor guy's name, powers, costume logo, city, and MO! I wouldn't be surprised to find out he's also licked Wally's mouse, worn his underwear, and sat in his sports car while passing gas just to make the thievery complete.
(Image and character ©1996 DC Comics, "The Flash", #116.)
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Posted in Bad Super Costumes, Super-Hero Stuff
Today's edition of OnomontoPOWia teaches us that when you're fighting assassins in the Far East, you get Asian-food sound effects:
Next week The Djinn will be tackling Mexican banditos with a mighty "Fajeeeta-skillitt!" sound, before moving on to Rachel Ray, punctuated with a resounding "crock-POT!"
(Image and character from “Coyote”, Vol. 1, No. 7, ©1984, Stephen Englehart.)
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Posted in OnomontoPOWia
Three middle-aged nerds (including yours truly!) review all of the MCU movies in chronological order. Short, funny, and full of good vibes, check it out and let us know what you think!
Nerdmudgeon.com
