Random Panel: I'll be back when I get hungry …

I’ll be back when I get hungry, and thank you for trying not to hurt me.

Is that a microphone you're holding or are you just happy to see me?

From the pages of “Jack Kirby’s Secret City” comes the ferocious General Ordiz and his … tape recorder?

Jack Kirby’s General Ortiz

Seriously, his shtick is that has a tape recorder strapped to his chest with a long wired microphone thingie in his hand. At least I sure hope that’s a microphone, because the other thing it looks like, well, it’s not really appropriate for a family-oriented blog. It would, however, be very scary to see one wielded by your opponent.

I don’t have any issues of the saga wherein General Ordiz takes any sort of direct action, but I’ll bet his trademark Witty Repartee is something like “Any last words?” right before he beats the snot out of his enemy with his club/microphone/deviant toy.

(Image ©1993, Jack Kirby.)

Random Panel: Ironic

Don’t interrupt a man in the midst of being ironic, it’s not polite.

Caption Contest 6: Hicks and Chicks

Here’s your weekly Caption Contest challenge:

caption6-b.jpg

I’m starting a new rule this week — no more than three entries per person per contest.

The prize for the winning entry is a free custom black and white illustration of whatever you like (within reason). To enter, make a comment below containing the dialog you would put in this scene. For example:

Top Word Balloon: Welcome back to “Dancing With the Undead Stars!” I’m your hostess, Draculette. Before the break,
Middle Word Balloon:poor Clark here gave quite a tasty performance, but he’s just been voted off.
Bottom Word Balloon: Permanently.

Put on those thinking caps and come up with your best funny line and you too could win your very own professional illustration!

Caption Contest 5 winner!

The winning for Caption Contest 5 is … Cameron Malcher!

Now THAT’s a blue screen of Death! M-Mother?

Congratulations Cameron, and many thanks to all of the fine entrants.

Random Panel: A symbiotic relationship

I suspect some sort of symbioitc relationship between herself and her garb.

Mashup 6: An expert on the Flush Toilet

If you love randomness and comic books (and let’s face it, if you didn’t you would never have found HeroMachine), you’re in luck, because it’s time for another edition of the Random Monday Mashup! Every week I take one panel from each of ten randomly selected comic books and attempt to forge an entertaining (if not necessarily coherent) story out of them. So sit back and enjoy the ride, as we encounter temptresses, toilet jockeys, space-bound warlocks, and more!
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Random Panel: All scientists, follow us!

All scientists — follow us on the run

Random Panel: Let's get packing …

Terminator 3

Belch Man also works …

This may be the greatest bad super of all time. Or the baddest great super, I can’t decide.

Gasbag

How can you not love a giant, inflatable guy named “Gasbag” whose power is to belch out various noxious clouds, accompanied by an explosive FRAAAPPP? I mean, we’re all either working alongside or related to someone exactly like this; let’s just be thankful the real life versions don’t actually wear spandex, or they wouldn’t be the only ones hurling at supersonic velocities.