Open Critique Day #30

Folks, it's time for another Open Critique Day!

If you have a HeroMachine illustration or another piece of artwork you've done that you'd like some help with, post a link to it in comments along with your thoughts on it -- what you think is working, what you're struggling with, etc. I will post my critique of the piece, hopefully giving some tips on how to improve it.

Of course everyone is welcome to post their critiques as well, keeping in mind the following rules:

  • Make sure your criticism is constructive. Just saying "This sucks" is both rude and unhelpful without giving specific reasons why you think it sucks and, ideally, some advice on how to make it better.
  • Each person should only post one illustration for critique to make sure everyone who wants feedback has a chance.
  • I will not critique characters entered in any currently running contest, as that doesn't seem fair to the other entrants. You can still post it if you like for the other visitors to critique, but I will not do so.

That's it! Hopefully we can get some good interaction going here and help everyone (me included!) learn a little bit today.

101 Responses to Open Critique Day #30

  1. Jeff Hebert says:

    Very cool, Rozenstal! I love the character design. The armor looks great with the almost glowing line effect, the face is intimidating, and the coloring on the cape is spot-on.

    The two areas I’d work on a bit are the mask in his had — it doesn’t look like it’s being held at all — and the ground beneath his feet. If you could add in maybe a scaled-up boulder or a squashed-down version of the background you have already, only in a darker brown, I think it would help avoid the sense that he’s just floating there. Unless he’s actually just floating there, in which case never mind.

    Great job!

  2. Kaldath says:

    I recently did a series of Angels for a Friend, one of which I put of here a couple Open Critiques ago ( the one sitting on the Moon ) After seeing those Angels another friend of mine asked me to do a Male Angel and I’d like some feed back on that resulting pic.

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=80959&d=1320726555

  3. Malfar says:

    http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2011/346/9/f/the_balm_by_malfar-d4iwb03.jpg

    The Balm. Can cleanse people of dark thoughts, poisons and addictions. Not really a good guy, because doesn’t think everybody must have a free will.

  4. Rozenstal says:

    Jeff (3), The idea is that through the armor and have lights and under the feet of it – the desert.

  5. Jeff Hebert says:

    Kaldath, very nice! Love the setting, the colors, and the glowing sun behind the figure. I also dig the innovative clothing on the angel himself.

    The part I’m not as sure about is the wings. Those are drawn as wooden stakes with feathers attached, and it looks like it despite the clever coloring. It just doesn’t look organic. Is there a way to use some of the more natural bird wings, or some way you can cover up the wooden struts?

    Oh, and the halo kind of blends in to the background as well, you might play around with the coloring on it to make it more halo-rific.

    Otherwise, though, well done as always!

  6. Jeff Hebert says:

    Malfar, LOVE the background! That’s a great effect. The glow in the chest ankh is nice too, and I like the slightly funk combination of modern clothing and robot parts.

    I’m not as crazy about the belt buckle. It’s so big it almost bifurcates the figure. I’d play around with either a different piece altogether, or at least making that one smaller so you get some sense of waist.

  7. Jeff Hebert says:

    Rozenstal, I get that, but the whole foreground (from under his feet back to the mountain range) comes off as a flat vertical slab. You need some kind of color difference from foreground to the mountain range to avoid that effect.

  8. Rozenstal says:

    Jeff, This is not a mountain. This sand dunes.

  9. Jeff Hebert says:

    Rozenstal, please listen closely: the problem is that there is no foreground. It looks like one giant mass, all in a vertical plane. YOU NEED SOME COLOR VARIATION GOING FROM FOREGROUND BACK (or vice versa). Whether it’s sand dunes or mountains doesn’t matter, it doesn’t read as varying levels going back in distance. If he’s supposed to be flying and those are dunes way down there, great. But that’s not what it looks like. It looks like one big undifferentiated vertical slab all at the same distance with no variation at all. Which looks wrong and confusing.

  10. ams says:

    G’day from the great white north! (not so white these days, more like greyish brown) Here is my latest character creation, SEAHAWK. As I wrote in the forums, I see this hero as a ex-navy seal who dons the proverbial super-armor and fights for good and yada, yada, yada. I also thought that the wings would transform from aerial(hawk) to aquatic (manta-like), but haven’t gotten to the sea-wing part yet. Let me know what you think. Cheers!

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81307&d=1323966097

  11. Jeff Hebert says:

    ams, love it! That’s always a great background and it fits here well. The armor and colors are really strong as well.

    Are the wings supposed to be energy projections, or actual physical wings? The glowing lines make me think the former, which is cool. If that’s the case, maybe making the interiors slightly transparent would heighten the effect.

    The only parts that don’t fit as well, for me at least, are the banded metal on the thighs and calves. They don’t contour to the legs beneath so they look like they’re bolted on or something rather than being part of the armor.

    Minor point, though, in another great illo.

  12. Rozenstal says:

    Jeff, Clearly, though, I would like to make the desert monochrome.

  13. Jeff Hebert says:

    Rozenstal, you can do whatever you want — it’s your drawing. I’m just telling you it looks flat and not like undulating, real-world dunes. At all. You can keep it all in the the same color family but introduce different variations of tone to give the effect of actual dunes.

    But do what you want, bro, it’s your vision and just my personal opinion. Take it or leave it. You asked for my input, and I just wanted to make sure you understood where I was coming from, even if you decide to dismiss it.

  14. Dionne Jinn says:

    I have been having hard time trying to get this background working properly. It is supposed to be a gazebo almost covered with flowers. Any ideas how to improve it?

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81323&d=1324057476

    And here is the same background with characters in it.

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81279&d=1323603107

  15. Doornik1142 says:

    I have one character but a few different versions.

    Thunder Fist
    http://i1100.photobucket.com/albums/g416/doornik1142/ThunderFist1.png
    http://i1100.photobucket.com/albums/g416/doornik1142/ThunderFist2.png

    He’s sort of a mercenary-cum-hitman with an arm made of pure energy. My main issue is I can’t decide whether he looks better with his whole arm shown or half the arm shown. Any other advice for improvement would also be helpful.

    I also have this other version of him with his arm bundled up.
    http://i1100.photobucket.com/albums/g416/doornik1142/ThunderFist3.png
    I was trying to do that thing like Curt Connors does where the sleeve of his shirt is rolled up to show that he’s missing an arm but I’m not sure how well it came out.

  16. Jeff Hebert says:

    Dionne Jinn, I think it looks great already! Awesome detail in there. My only suggestion would be the same as for Rozenstal — play around with the colors a bit to introduce depth of field. Meaning, if the flowers in the background behind the gazebo are the same color as the same flowers in front of the gazebo, it serves to flatten out the image. The ones further back should be darker in tone than the ones in front.

    Great job, though, I like it!

  17. BloodlessRose says:

    Here is a pic I made based on the characters my friends and I use in our D&D games. (And I’m in the middle as DM, of course ;))

    http://i1117.photobucket.com/albums/k584/BloodlessRose/DungeonRunners.png

  18. Doornik1142 says:

    Dionne Jinn (15)

    It definitely works better with characters in it. Without them it’s hard to judge the scale of the thing and the proportions seem not quite right.

    One thing I notice is the sword guards you used as decorations don’t continue all the way around the structure. They seem to be present on three sides of the gazebo but not the one closest to the foreground.

  19. Jeff Hebert says:

    Doornik1142, first off, love the design. Cool looking guy, simply but perfectly done. He looks like someone you’d want to know more about.

    Regarding the sleeve/fist, I think I like the shorter sleeve best. The one with no arm doesn’t work as well for me, since he just looks like a one-armed guy instead of an energy-arm guy, but the latter is more interesting (at least to me).

    In fact, I’d be curious to see it with no sleeve at all there, just the arm. I mean, for it to be ragged, he’d have to not have noticed it was getting burned away and just left it like that. But if it’s an ongoing thing, you’d think he’d cut the sleeve off completely for convenience’s sake.

    Anyway, yeah, I like the shortest sleeve with the arm the best of the three.

  20. Dionne Jinn says:

    Doornik1142 (18): Yes, they don’t as they would cover too much of the upper part of the picture. That is part of my problem with it, actually. At first the “door” was supposed to be there, which would have given an excuse to leave them off, but that just didn’t work.

  21. Jeff Hebert says:

    BloodlessRose, nifty! Looks like a fun group. The black background makes some of the darker details on the characters hard to make out, but otherwise it’s a nice group drawing, good job!

  22. Doornik1142 says:

    BloodlessRose (18)

    I like the little dude with the lute. He looks like Rick Allen if he were born in the Middle Ages (and was a Hobbit). XD

    A few changes I would make:

    – The male fighter in the bottom left has an empty sheath on his belt. The sword on his back is clearly too big to fit in it, so that empty sheath seems out of place. I would either switch that belt out for a different one or put a hilt over that sheath so it looks like he’s got another weapon there.

    – Several of your characters are wearing black clothes. This makes them blend in too much with the black background. Instead of black, I would color their clothes very dark grey (ideally two shades of grey to show more definition) so they stand out a little better.

    – The “Dungeon Runners” title. I like the name, not so much the placement. The area behind it is a little too chaotic what with the character’s legs and the creature in the background. I would move the title somewhere it will stand out a little more. Perhaps even put it inside a box.

  23. ams says:

    Thanks for the critique Jeff! I see what you mean about the legs. So here is an update dropping those items. It does make the character sleeker for soaring through the air or diving underwater. Got to remember to to but to much “90’s” into my designs. Cheers!

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81324&d=1324058929

  24. ams says:

    – to not put to much “90’s” – sorry…

  25. Jeff Hebert says:

    Meniukas, that’s awesome! Very cool, moody, atmospheric sort of piece. I can’t think of anything to suggest for improvements, I think you nailed it.

  26. Jeff Hebert says:

    ams, yes, I like that much better!

  27. Doornik1142 says:

    Jeff (20)

    Sorry, I should have been more clear. His energy arm goes away when he’s not using it. The rolled sleeve version is supposed to be what he looks like when he’s “powered down”. And when he powers up his arm bursts out and rips open the sleeve, like the Lizard. (I haven’t decided whether it actually burns things that it touches.)

    I tried it with no sleeve at all but…I dunno, it just didn’t look right. See for yourself:
    http://i1100.photobucket.com/albums/g416/doornik1142/ThunderFist4-1.png

  28. Jeff Hebert says:

    Ah, I see — yeah, the no-sleeve version doesn’t work. I still prefer the short sleeve burned version. For the no-arm version, I dunno … maybe use the rolled-up glove top from Gloves? That tends to look more like a folded-under sleeve end, at least to me. The hammer top you’re using now there is the main problem, I think.

  29. Jeff Hebert says:

    Jetisr, the main figure is nice enough, a very solid Rakshasa sort of character. Having his human-skin lines colored instead of black is a little jarring since all of the other lines remain black. I also don’t get the background environment at all. I think it’s supposed to be a big yin-yang symbol, right? But with scenes in the eyes. Unfortunately making the eyes ovals instead of circles kind of destroys the illusion. I also think it’d be more effective if you couldn’t see that bottom black line, and if the scenes were larger.

    Hope that helps …

  30. Kaldath says:

    @Doornik1142, If you want to try the sleeveless look again I’d suggest using the “sleeve” from MaleFantasyCommon Page 2 Bottom Row, Second item.

  31. Tarkabarka says:

    Good evening all.

    An old work for me, but especially i love the theme this picture.
    The idea behind this picture is that.

    Always angel whisper in our ears, sometimes they are good, but few times we hear what we tell the evil.

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=80505&d=1317918623

  32. Moomonster says:

    This is version 1:
    http://imageshack.us/f/819/fsb.png/
    http://imageshack.us/f/862/hjsdfadef.png/

    Version 2:
    http://imageshack.us/f/842/vfdk.png/

    They’re barely different. mostly the neck piece. And I have a Crab… man…. thing that I was going to enter for the Cancer zodiac challenge but decided not to:
    http://imageshack.us/f/856/bhjd.png/

    I’m fairly satisfied with her (except the dysfunction going on with the background) But I was just really unhappy with his overall composition. Any tips on how to execute better? Or maybe what I could’ve done for a background?

  33. Cliff says:

    Not sure of you got to see this since the link was broken at one point

    http://s795.photobucket.com/albums/yy240/Cliff_HM3/Cliff_PrixyOrnament001-1.jpg

  34. Captain Kicktar says:

    Perun is a Drow mage who’s started to lose his mind.
    http://i.imgur.com/wyWHm.jpg

  35. Albannach says:

    Went for a sort of sketch effect with this one.

    http://i519.photobucket.com/albums/u352/DENZIS666/Ghost.png

  36. Jeff Hebert says:

    Tarkabarka, great illustration! Lots of good stuff in there, from the character designs to the concept to the layout. Well done.

    My only suggestion would be in the red demon’s wings. They seem to sweep from behind her back to in front of her knees, but because of the way I drew them they don’t seem curved, as they would have to be to fit that way. Plus, the positioning of them echoes her waist to a degree that creates some visual confusion in that area. I wonder if you could do the wings maybe swept back instead, or spread more? Just something to get away from the visual logjam in that area.

    Otherwise, love love love it!

  37. Jeff Hebert says:

    Moomonster, I like both illustrations a lot. She has a sense of grace about her, and I dig the pattern background. The whole thing flows nicely and fits together well. In terms of the two versions, as-is I like the second one, with the spread-out neck collar scalloped thingie going on more than the first one with it wrapped just around her neck. BUT, I think it might be interesting to try that neck-only version with a scarf billowing out from it behind her head and out to the side like it, too, is blowing in the wind. Just an idea.

    Very nice character and illustration!

  38. Jeff Hebert says:

    Whit, I like the concept and the sort of one-color treatment. Very artsy. My major concern is with the positioning of the cup combined with the yellow … It kind of looks like (and I hate saying this) like he’s in the middle of giving a urine sample. I don’t mean that as mean, it’s just what immediately leapt off the page at me.

  39. Jadebrain says:

    Here’s a rather old one, and as such I don’t know if you’ve critiqued it before, but I’ll post it anyway.

    This is Rusuficier, basically a forgotten god in the setting that I am making a game in. He actually feels fortunate that his pantheon has been mostly forgotten, though, as he has more important things to do than listen to all the mortals whining at him to solve all their little problems. Like secretly holding back a giant horde of demonic beasts that would wreak havoc on all the world if they could get past the barrier that keeps them away from civilization. Or reviving the long-dead god (who is also his best friend) that was killed when the otherworldly force that turned demons (who were originally fairly regular people) into bloodthirsty monsters first arrived.

    Personality-wise, he’s rather cheerful and enjoys good humor and good ale, at least in his down time (which comes rarely). When he needs to be serious, though, he doesn’t mess around. As you might be able to tell by looking at the demon in the background, he dual-weilds two halberd-like weapons which he refers to as the “Comet Moons,” named as such for the shapes of the two blades that look like they form a crescent moon with a comet’s tail. The Comet Moon is also his official symbol.

    In case you’re wondering about the doves, I added those for comedic irony. Really, I’m just looking for tips on the costume itself; as I said before, the picture is old, and the quality of the picture itself isn’t quite as good as it could be.

  40. Jeff Hebert says:

    Cliff, that’s really a neat idea, and very well done! I definitely got the concept and it’s quite clever. The figure itself is excellent as is the pine-needle treatment.

    My only slight reservation is with the silver bit he’s got between his leg. After studying it for a bit, I realized it was probably that little cap they put on ornaments for the hanger, and he’s straddling it, but it took me a while.

    I wonder if instead of the horizontal stripe pattern, you could instead mask on the concentric rings like in one of the previous posts here, to make it look more like you’re seeing a tilted globe. The straight lines currently make it look like you’re seeing the ornament from the side, but then you’ve got the hanger on top.

    Nifty holiday illustration, thanks for reposting it — I didn’t get to see it the first time around.

  41. Jeff Hebert says:

    Albannach, that’s a nice effect. I wonder how it would look if you took that one Aura item (I think it’s in Aura, anyway) that’s just a bunch of horizontal lines, and colored that to look like pencil strokes, masking it onto the various items. That might make it look “sketchier”.

    Neat looking fellow, though, I like it.

  42. Myro says:

    Put up a Sci-Fiish version of my character Seven for the Lissom contest. I was a little up against it for time, and I might have hurt myself for trying to kill 2 birds with one stone.

    http://i685.photobucket.com/albums/vv217/Myrowire/Hero%20Machine%20Contest%20Entries/myro-seven.png

  43. Jeff Hebert says:

    Jadebrain, it sounds like a neat concept. I dig the attitude he shows and the dead demon. That’s some cool stuff.

    In terms of the costume, I do think it needs … more? Something to jazz it up a little as it’s pretty plain at the moment. That could mean some detailing in the breastplate, or some belts with various stuff on them, or a shoulder strap, or maybe arm guards or tattoos or something. I also think the color selections could be tighter. The blue and the green in particular don’t seem to fit in with the rest of it — I’d go with one or the other and use it more consistently throughout.

  44. Jeff Hebert says:

    Myro, she’s definitely lissom! I do prefer the version you submitted to this one, though this has some good things going for it, too. I think the balcony perching pose is neat, and the general costume design is nice. My major concern, though, is that the pose makes her look a little hunch-shouldered — I know she’s leaning slightly forward but it doesn’t quite come off due to the way the torso was drawn. I also would probably have gone with a more yellow-ish tone for the moon to sort of recapitulate what’s happening in the railing, rather than the pinkish/red tones from her costume.

    Otherwise, though, nice as always!

  45. dblade says:

    I hope no one minds me using this blog for feedback on art assets. I just want to catch those people who don’t frequent the forums or who are more likely to comment on Open Critique Day.

    I would appreciate any feedback before I prepare them for submission to Jeff.

    These are the winners from the Week 12 Poll (Hair).

    Thick Tentacle Hair: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=80230&d=1316103205

    Wavy Hair: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81086&d=1321630755

    Fire Hair (This one is actually a rough that I need to add more line variation to, but it should give you a good idea of what will be the finished product): http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81097&d=1321654126

    This is the winner from the Week 13 Poll (Armor).
    Stealth Torso Armor: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81079&d=1321570100

    These are the art assets from Week 14 Poll (Wings). I got carried away and made all the wings in the poll.

    Faery Wing: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81187&d=1322512390

    Dragon/Demon Wing: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81134&d=1321996112

    Feathery Wing: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81122&d=1321910676

    This the winner from the Week 15 Poll (Cybernetic Items).

    Cyber Arm: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81251&d=1323288072

    These are the winners of the Week 16 Poll (Noses).

    Lizardy Nose: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81252&d=1323296743

    Bat Nose: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81295&d=1323807336

  46. dblade says:

    Hmmm…That looks a lot more overwhelming than I thought. Feel free to pick and choose what you want to comment on. This will help me build better assets. Thanks.

  47. Basic says:

    I obviously haven’t finished the highlighting yet, but I’d appreciate any critique on the actual character.

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81326&d=1324067905

  48. Tarkabarka says:

    Thanks Jeff

    I repair the wings. But the image is my other computer, and i only access that for only thursday πŸ˜› –

  49. Jeff Hebert says:

    Basic, I like it! The items all fit well and he looks very cohesive. My only reservation would be that maybe the design is a little too close to Yellowjacket’s, with the logo and the black chest vee.

  50. ams says:

    Love the armor and the wings, dblade. Could have used those on my character that I submitted this week. Got any manta wings in the …err….wings? All are great assets!! Cheers!

  51. Volt says:

    Hey! Hi everyone! I want to show u, an sketch from my Clown “Syk” and I want to know your opinion..

    Talking about the pants, I want to change them for Skinny jeans like Justin Bieber Jeans..
    here the clown!
    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=291485000889333&set=a.159195527451615.26493.100000835067153&type=3

    here others drawings
    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=211320042239163&set=a.159195527451615.26493.100000835067153&type=3

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=264808446890322&set=a.159195527451615.26493.100000835067153&type=3

  52. EXILE says:

    http://theexilesauthor.deviantart.com/

    I am writng a Manga-chapter book that is awesome all-around called “The Messiah”
    View it and send me feedback m’kay guys?!

  53. Ghenmor says:

    Malfar (4)

    Alright…I have to ask, since I keep seeing people able to do this. How DOES one get that kind of glow effect?

  54. dblade says:

    @ams (55): Perhaps a manta ray cape? I’ll add that to the list of items. I should do a Capes poll.

  55. Dionne Jinn says:

    Ok. This is how the gazebo looks like now (empty):

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81328&d=1324070499

    And here with the heroes:

    http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81327&d=1324070444

    Thank you for your help and advice Jeff and Doornik!

  56. dblade says:

    @Ghenmor (57): There is an item in the Backgrounds/Shapes section that is used for the glow effect. It is a Circle that if you set the Line Color and Prime Color (Color 1) to 0 opacity will give you a radial gradient that you can make into a variety of highlights, darklights and glow effects.

    Here it is on the HM3 item toolbar showing the exact item: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=80380&d=1316962354

    And here is the color setting toolbar with the Line Color and Color 1 set to 0 opacity: http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=80381&d=1316962375

  57. FRM says:

    dblade– i love all those items, and i’ve wanted the tentacle hair for a while.

  58. FRM says:

    here’s a crazy villain in a prison cell.
    http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/noprison2.png/286968302/noprison2.png
    here’s a pair of telepathic twins
    http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/telepath_twins2.png/286967856/681×512/telepath_twins2.png
    here’s TheDarke. what he is is up for interpretation.
    http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/telepath_twins2.png/286967856/681×512/telepath_twins2.png
    i got the skeleton shadow idea from one of the “Lissom” entries.

  59. Worf says:

    @Ghenmor(57): you do that “glow” effect by using a background on top. It’s in background -> Shapes, last page, first line, third item. Set color 1 and color 3 to 0% alpha, and select color 2 to the color glow you want (most of the time it’ll be white). Then it’s just a matter of sizing and positioning.

    Hope that helps.

  60. Worf says:

    @dblade: All I can say is…. MOOOOORE! GIVE US MORE!

    That dragon wing is earmarked for a character I’m doing. πŸ˜‰

  61. FRM says:

    Malfar– the belt is cool.

  62. Jeff Hebert says:

    FRM, as the post says, I only do one per person, so I’m just taking the first one listed. It’s a neat idea, but the knees just don’t work — they look broken. I do love the face and the clever use of the straitjacket to look like his hands are behind him, though.

  63. Jeff Hebert says:

    Volt, I think it’s great! Excellent line work and anatomy. Great job!

  64. Dionne Jinn says:

    dblade: I love the lot of them! All great additions.

    (Damn… I was too interested in reading the stuff here, my pizza burned…)

  65. Doornik1142 says:

    dblade: All of those are awesome, but I’m especially excited about the dragon/demon wings. Any idea when they’ll be put in the system? I’ve got plans for those wings.

  66. Nick Hentschel says:

    I don’t really know that I need “criticism” that badly, but I HATE not participating in OCD, and I’m kind of proud of this one: it’s one of the drawings that I had to completely reconstruct after the last hard-drive crash. It’s also one of my more ambitious attempts at a sun-behind-trees effect.

    This is yet ANOTHER of the story characters that I’m designing. He’s a sort of “cleric/ranger,” in D&D terms, a member of an order of monks who work in the wild, as guides to pilgrims and the lost. (That’s why his outfit is green.)

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/huskybike/6522804299/

  67. dblade says:

    @Doornik142(71) and Worf(66): I plan on submitting the wings to Jeff this weekend. After that it’s up to Jeff when they are added to HM3.

  68. Jeff Hebert says:

    Looks good, Nick! Great colors and design. Well done!

  69. Jeff Hebert says:

    OK folks, shutting this edition of OCD down. Have a good one, and feel free to keep commenting — I just am ending my own participation. Have a good weekend!

  70. Doornik1142 says:

    Nick (72)

    I like him. You pulled off the sunrise-behind-trees effect quite well (though I’m not sure what that white ring is supposed to be; lens flair?). His pose is very welcoming and non-threatening, exactly what I would expect from a monk. And for some reason I also like the way he’s holding his staff at a slight angle instead of straight up and down. Not sure why that works for me but it does.

    However, the outfit is bugging me. I understand you were going for a forest theme, but it matches a little too well with the surrounding foliage. It would be better if you made him a different shade of green and added some sort of flair to his outfit. When you say they serve as “guides to pilgrims and the lost” I assume you mean they do search and rescue. Real life search and rescue workers usually wear something brightly colored so that a lost person can see them at a distance. Maybe your monks could wear a bright red sash or cloak.

  71. FRM says:

    please express opinions on TheDarke.
    and what could i do to make the legs not look broken?

  72. Syntax says:

    These were characters for a deconstruction/parody of Power Rangers that I was planning on writing. They were based on card suits (though the villain is based on Chess) and they go by the name of the Regalia.

    The villain, King: http://i.imgur.com/U0IHS.jpg
    The Token chick, Queen of Clubs: http://i.imgur.com/5BLDa.jpg
    The Smart Guy, 10 of Hearts: http://i.imgur.com/MdAqE.jpg
    The Bruiser/Token minority, Jack of Diamonds: http://i.imgur.com/eFkZV.jpg
    The leader, Ace of Spades: http://i.imgur.com/2Bujp.jpg
    The Old Mentor, Suitor: http://i.imgur.com/xSvZf.jpg

    A lot of images, no?

  73. Nick Hentschel says:

    Doornik (76): Thanks. Here’s what I was thinking (whether I stay with it or not)…

    A) the white circle was supposed to be a sort of halo/rainbow effect caused by the sun. It’s an effect that I haven’t used before, so I’m not bothered that it might need refining.

    B) The right shade of green is hard to pick out: I’ve experimented with 4-5 different shades, in varying combinations, and I’m still not completely happy.

    C) “Search and rescue”? Well, they might, but their main duty has been leading people on pilgrimages, or occasionally trade caravans (the Church gets the money, of course). True, they could stand out more, but other times, you want to blend in. Tough call
    On early idea was for the edging of his robes to be gold, not dark green, or at least light brown. I could go back to that.

    D) that staff pose was the only way I could really fit it into the picture, given his stance. And besides, straight up-and-down would look very military and threatening.

    Thanks again for your input.

  74. Dionne Jinn says:

    Nick Hentschel (72): I like the way you used the parchment as a bedroll.

  75. Nick Hentschel says:

    Dionne Jinn (80): Thanks; I couldn’t think of a better idea.

  76. Doornik1142 says:

    Nick (79)

    You could have a reversible cloak with a bright color on the one side and camo-green on the other. So blending in or being visible would just be a matter of turning out the right side of the cloak.

    Either way, he really needs something to make him stand out a bit more from the background.

  77. Doornik1142 says:

    Syntax (78)

    To be perfectly honest, your guys could easily pass for a real Power Rangers team. If a supervillain had tried to conquer the Earth in the Middle Ages, this looks like exactly the kind of Ranger team Zordon would recruit.

    So even though I like it, but there’s nothing about their designs that screams “parody” to me.

  78. Doornik1142 says:

    FRM (77)

    You could try using a couple of round insignias to camouflage the sharp angles around the knees.

  79. Syntax says:

    Not parody as in “making something ridiculous out of something”, more parody as in “I’m putting my own spin on things but staying kinda true to the source material.” Kinda like what Weird Al does. But it actually got darker and darker as I started planning things out.

    The villain didn’t know who he was, why he hated the good guys, why he was fighting them, or why he had the obligatory army of mooks. He just did, though somewhat reluctantly. He even had a civilian persona that was a classmate of the heroes, and neither persona knew the other exsisted.

    The mentor became a monstrous Knight Templar kind of guy, having no sympathy for lawbreakers of any kind, no compassion for others, and zero understanding as to why his chosen warriors aren’t ready or able to fight monsters 24/7.

    As for the heroes themselves, I was planning on showing somewhat realistic consequences for teen superheroing, such as trying and failing to hide the fact that a teammate has been captured from their distraught parents, getting sent to the hospital after a fight, possibly even character death.

  80. Nick Hentschel says:

    Doornik (82) – There’s not a lot of room for variation in monk’s clothes: a tunic, a scapular (the shoulder cape/hood), a surplice (the apron-y thing down the front). I could adjust the color to brown, perhaps, or even try a pale red or blue. But as I now recall, I mixed my own shade of green for the original picture, so maybe I should try it again……

  81. Volt says:

    Next character design contest can be a design of a movie scene or character design? sorry my level of english is low..

  82. FRM says:

    Doornik1142– thanks, i’ll try that.

  83. FRM says:

    i think those circles did the trick for the straight jacket guy. you tell me.
    http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/noprison3.png/286999670/noprison3.png

  84. FRM says:

    Meniukas– i love the south american/african feel. i want to know more about him. and nice gradients.

  85. FRM says:

    here’s Bronzia, a champion fighter for an illegal superhuman arena club.
    http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/Bronzia2.png/287003098/435×648/Bronzia2.png

  86. Moi says:

    I hate it when people think December 21st is the end

    The mayans have fell from power YEARS ago

  87. skybandit says:

    Spacecraft aren’t easy to make in HM, but it can be done.

    http://i1018.photobucket.com/albums/af309/skybandit/spacepirates.jpg

  88. Whit says:

    @Jeff (42): Never would have occurred to me. First off, never thought of the colours as yellows, I was trying to make creams. Second off, I would never want to depict that. πŸ˜€ But that’s why it’s good to have other folks look over your work, to catch the things you wouldn’t, eh?

  89. BloodlessRose says:

    hey guys,

    thanks for the advice.

    The background wasnt black it was a verrrry dark blue, but i do see your point and i have changed it.

    also the clothes have to be black as that is what the characters where in game but i did my best to make them stand out a bit better than black on black on black.

    unfortunately the name has to stay where it is as that is the least intrusive place in the scene. but heres what i have done and i hope u like the slightly edited version.

    http://i1117.photobucket.com/albums/k584/BloodlessRose/RunnersEdit.png

  90. Dionne Jinn says:

    Skybandit (93): Wow! That is very impressive. Nicely done spaceship indeed. But you might try to make a hazy effect on the Earth in the background, as if it was covered by atmosphere. Right now it looks kind of flat.

  91. Nick Hentschel says:

    Forr Doornik and Dionne:

    I ditched the halo effect; it wasn’t the right one anyway, For another take on the character’s look, I went with basic brown, having him blend with the trees, instead of the foliage.
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/huskybike/6525735793/

    Any better?

  92. FRM says:

    skybandit–is the electricity thae gun powering up or the gun about to explode?

  93. Doornik1142 says:

    Nick (97)

    He definitely stands out a lot better now.

  94. TOOL says:

    I know its a little late but i was in hospital, don’t worry all is well. Here goes…
    http://i1224.photobucket.com/albums/ee363/cameron_stanley_84/My%20Characters/TOOL-ArmoredNinja.png