Keeping with Dan’s suggestion that we take a look at the worst-dressed moments in this history of the Avengers in the movie, I bring you Thor, God of the G-String!
First, let this serve as a warning to all you budding artists out there that you should never base your drawings on your action figures.
Second, if you can tear your eyes away from that Ken-like monstrosity of a crotch and the giant balloon legs, think about how this outfit works. A normal plunging neckline (for instance, like Luke Cage’s) covers all but the middle of your chest because presumably you want lots of protection from the elements and enemy bullets while still letting the chicks gaze with wonder at your pecs.
To that, Thor says “Nay nay”! Because apparently Thor heard about these things called “G-Strings” and wanted to try them out, only to be thwarted by his articulated nether regions. So he went all atomic wedgie and yanked that sucker over his head.
It’s like a negative-space shirt, covering what ought to be open and opening what ought to be covered. I bet that’s what the giant floating heads behind him are screaming so violently about. “THOR! I CAN SEE YOUR NIPPLES! AND WHY IS YOUR CROTCH THAT? SERIOUSLY BROTHER, YOU SHOULD SEE SOMEONE. LIKE, NOW. AND WHERE IS MY BODY?! I CAN’T STOP SCREAMING, YAAAAAAH!”