The future of fashion is not pretty

Apparently in the future everyone dresses exactly as you’d expect hyper-intelligent, bored, lazy, passive nerds to:

knodar

I get that this poor schlub is from a future with no criminals, but surely he had a video of one, or a photo, or a drawing, or a description of a photo of a drawing. Something, anything, to give him a clue that his outfit is incredibly lame.

First of all, a unitard is hard to pull off for anyone, and granted, I’d kill for a set of pajamas with the footsies already built in. But not boots. You don’t mix footsie PJs and boots, that ought to be a criminal offense right there.

Second, if your name is Knodar, you don’t put “P” all over your uniform, ok? Work with me here. Even if you’re going for a prison-fetish look, like he is, it’s confusing to have a letter on your outfit that doesn’t appear anywhere in your name.

Third, lose the hat. A hat and a mask and a popped collar move you well beyond “cool pulp character” and into “fashion disaster”.

Finally, you’re from the incredibly advanced future, and the best weapon you could come up with is an electric spatula? Really? I’m starting to think the other future citizens “helped” Knodar figure out how to “escape” to the past, just to get rid of this Loser for the Ages.

(Character and image © DC Comics, Inc.)

12 Responses to The future of fashion is not pretty

  1. It says right in the sheet, Jeff, the ‘P’ markings are for ‘prisoner’. He simply had to stick with it because everyone in his time knew him, and every tailor he approached in our time started laughing to hard to help him.

  2. I thought the “P” stood for “Pinhead.” Oy vey, what a trainwreck.

  3. Judging by his costume, Knodar definitely doesn’t have gaydar.

  4. Warning: Contains dangerously unPC humor.
    Maybe, with all those robots doing everything for them, they’ve eliminated the whole gay vs. straight thing too. Thus, no gaydar, or anyone to warn him about his poor fashion sense.

  5. Hey! He pee’d his outfit! ;)

  6. William A. Peterson

    Look, as Prison Garb, it’s not just appropriate, it’s brilliant! Imagine trying to intimidate the Prison Guards while wearing something like that!

  7. “Quit laughing at my outfit, prison guard, or I’ll give you the Aunt Jemima treatment with my magic spatula!”

  8. wow willie your back we missed you i voted for you to replace jeff if his contract wasn’t renewed

  9. I voted for Barack Obama to replace Jeff if his contract wasn’t renewed, but he said he had “bigger career plans”. Pfft! But his contract MUST be renewd! It MUST! Jeff Hebert IS Heromachine… metaphorically speaking!
    And I like the electric spatula idea! You can cook a burger without a stove or grill! Genius! The P needs to be replaced, though.

  10. If I were Knodar’s designer I would RATHER not go in that direction. I instead would go for a badass assassin-style costume with a couple of big futuristic guns or swords.

  11. This is my version of a redesigned Knodar.

    http://img4.imageshack.us/my.php?image=kandor.gif

    in this version he is a wanted assassin who is targeting Hal Jordan as part of a deal by a futuristic crime lord to change the current timeline.

  12. HalLoweEn JacK

    “Base of operations: 25th Century Earth” WTF?!

    Green Lantern. “Quick, we need to hunt down knobdar, where can he be found?”

    Lantern Corp admin. “According to our files, he lives on Earth in the 25th century.”

    GL: “Yes, but which nation or city? do you have a street address?”

    LCA: “Just Earth, 25th century.”

    GL: “So how am I supposed to find him?”

    LCA: “Phone book?”