Caption Contest 9: The Poetic Pooch

Come up withe the best, funniest dialog for this caption, and you'll win your very own custom black and white illustration of whatever you like (within reason) from professional illustrator Jeff Hebert!

caption9.jpg

For instance:

Top Balloon: I used to hear dogs talking to me, but now they're writing?!
Bottom Balloon: I'd say he's the smartest dog I ever saw, only he's too stupid to remember you can't read. Pity.

The rules are: 1) No more than three entries per person; 2) Keep it appropriate for a broadcast TV sitcom (i.e. no swearing); 3) leave your entry in the comments to this post.

Good luck everyone!

24 Responses to Caption Contest 9: The Poetic Pooch

  1. Avatar Ashton Jakobson says:

    Panel 1: “Legs”, what is this supposed to mean?!

    Panel 2: The dog wanted to let you know that Angelina Jolie is behind you, but there was only so much room on the paper.

  2. Avatar Ashton Jakobson says:

    Panel 1: Bad dog, when I told you to go for the intruders legs, that’s not what I had in mind!

    Panel 2: Hey, it’s a dog, he only did what you told him to do.

  3. Avatar Ashton Jakobson says:

    Panel 1: And the winner of this year’s Ms. Bikini is….!

    Panel 2: A dog? The Contest aint what it used to be…

  4. Avatar Xstacy says:

    1st balloon: I told you my teaching isn’t wasted. Spot’s learned to write “legs”!

    2nd balloon: Oh, great going, now he’s one step closer to being able to write “Two legs bad, four legs good”.

  5. Avatar Jester says:

    First Balloon: “Sweet suffering sherbert slices of sick psychopaths!!! Is that what I think it is?!”

    Second Balloon: Yes! what Duke is holding IS the secret ingredient to my world famous baked beans! LEGS! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!

  6. Avatar Jester says:

    First Balloon: What the…? “Legs”? what is this?!

    Second Balloon: Actually, he was trying to say “Look out, there are a couple of ominous-looking silohettes of creepy people behind you!”, but he isn’t the best speller.

  7. Avatar Frankie says:

    Balloon1: “Bi-shop? So, what? We all look alike to you? What if I called you Spuds, or the Little Rascal’s dog?”

    Balloon2: “Shut up and just take the cryptic note from the messenger. Sheesh, this is the last time I hire the homeless as secret operatives. The poor guy thinks the mutt is talking to him.”

  8. Avatar Frankie says:

    Balloon1: “Sir? He won’t letgo the note. I can’t make it out. I see an ‘L’, an ‘E’, a ‘G’, an ‘S’…”

    Balloon2: “It’s ‘LEGS’, you mook. Lysol Eliminates Gunk and Scum. Good. Freddie, go to the store and buy all the Lysol products that you can. My dad always told me tom clean up my act. And now I have the very means to get started.

  9. Avatar Deadeas says:

    1: Legs? You noticed that my legs are more shapely thanks to my new Stairmaster?

    2: Great, another one converted…Chuck won’t be pleased, he’s got too many Total Gyms building up…

  10. Avatar The Doomed Pixel says:

    Top Balloon: But…I don’t wanna touch it. It’s been in a dog’s mouth!

    Bottom Balloon: And it tastes twice as good. Give it here.

  11. Avatar Coyote says:

    1: legs ??? what the?

    2: yes legs and she knows how to use them!

  12. Avatar Coyote says:

    1: hey look spots found the wining lotto ticket !

    2: Sqweeeeeeeee !!! we can buy faces now!

  13. Avatar Coyote says:

    1: and the last part is…..legs!

    2: yes now in just seven days ill will make you a man ! riff raff to the lab!

  14. Avatar LiveWyre14 says:

    1: Okay, I really don’t think you’re getting this boy.

    2: I thought the dog was trained to sniff out antrax in the mail…not BRING IT BACK!!!

  15. Avatar BrokenSlot says:

    Balloon #1- I can’t believe it! Finally, the final solution!
    Balloon #2- Ok man, one, careful what you say around here and two, you can’t let the dog help you win Scrabble. It’s called cheating you know.

  16. Avatar BrokenSlot says:

    Guy 1- Okay, a one, and a two, and…
    Guy 2-I see a little silhouetto of a man…
    Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango!!

  17. Avatar Kakashi64 says:

    Balloon 1: That’s great, Fido! It’s *my* favorite ZZ Top song, too!

    Balloon 2: I don’t think Bobby Brown will *ever* make it into the 21st Century…

  18. Avatar Frankie says:

    Balloon1: “The dog says legs, Mr. Sharc.”

    Balloon2: “Legs, eh? Well, you know the rules to Canine Roulette. Cut the contestant’s legs off if he can’t answer the final question in under 3 seconds.”

  19. Avatar Richard Tale says:

    Balloon 1: Oh, boy… Not again…

    Balloon 2: Snoop Dog! Drugs again? You know they turn you into a dog and make you wish you had seven legs.

  20. Avatar Richard Tale says:

    Balloon 1: It’s a dog with a note saying “Legs”.

    Balloon 2: Ok, he wants fish legs again. Give him some chicken legs and then some rabit legs and he will forget them. Poor dog.

  21. Avatar The Grizz says:

    Guy: Oh no! The dog killed the postman and chewed up a letter from my mistress!

    Other Guy: Um sir… that’s just a display for the movie Maildog.

  22. Guy 1: My welfare check! That’s a good boy…
    Guy 2: Finally we can get the power turned back on!

  23. Avatar cybersavant says:

    Legs: “Dynomutt?!? What’re YOU doing here?”

    Silhouette: “Legs!! I told ya not ta let that flea-bag inside the clubhouse!”

  24. Avatar Leiha M says:

    Balloon # 1: What does it say Hannibal?

    Balloon # 2: Dang it! We taught the dog how to write and forgot to teach B.A. how to read!