Although my new full-time (non-HeroMachine) job might keep me from actually getting to these before tomorrow, it's time for another Open Critique Day!
But hopefully you'll get a lot more than 16 neurons firing on the case.
If you have a HeroMachine illustration or another piece of artwork you've done that you'd like some help with, post a link to it in comments along with your thoughts on it -- what you think is working, what you're struggling with, etc. I will post my critique of the piece, hopefully giving some tips on how to improve it.
Of course everyone is welcome to post their critiques as well, keeping in mind the following rules:
- Make sure your criticism is constructive. Just saying "This sucks" is both rude and unhelpful without giving specific reasons why you think it sucks and, ideally, some advice on how to make it better.
- Each person should only post one illustration for critique to make sure everyone who wants feedback has a chance.
- I will not critique characters entered in any currently running contest, as that doesn't seem fair to the other entrants. You can still post it if you like for the other visitors to critique, but I will not do so.
That's it! Hopefully we can get some good interaction going here and help everyone (me included!) learn a little bit today.
repost from Psick post
My rendition of Psi-Hawk
http://lordgrimm01.deviantart.com/art/Psi-Hawk-Revisted-282937990
What sort of look are you going for? An American-Indian or Asian-Indian one?
Hello there.
Today i haven’t got time to make reviews, so i only show pictures.
Silent shadows walks in the night. Only scream behind when she walk. No one knows who is she and what she wants. One thing is certain only the fear of acting before she. The goods are trusth her and Afraid the evils. She saves the innocent and condemning the sinful, like the blind goddess, but her eyes are not blind. A Yakuza just before his death wrote on the wall with his bloody finger …. Shiki. The evil call her this name a like that what was her named she hunt for the criminals like an evil spirits.
http://img840.imageshack.us/img840/6761/shikil.png
I like it. I do wish that you would show all of the wings. Sometimes that is hard to do. After I finish the character I will move all button and move it down to fit into the frame. When you save it it will go back to the original position.
Cool concept. The color out the outlines and shaded areas almost makes it texture.
Here is an update of one of my favorite characters. Just finshed him, so I thought to throw him out to the masses. THE REAPER!
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=82102&d=1328284780
This has been waiting for a while for me to bring it up for OCD. I think the characters work OK, but the corner sofa they are sitting on does not. Also the door on the right – well, it doesn’t look like a door, really… Any advice would be wellcomed.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81415&d=1324678994
http://i519.photobucket.com/albums/u352/DENZIS666/TragoediaArctica.png
I created this before the last contest, but then put it in as a half-hearted entry.
I know I’m not suppose to, but I fear the Reaper.
He’s awesome. I’m a big scaredy cat when it comes to shifting the poses of the heroes, so I’m quite impressed with your use of dynamic new stances.
I see what you mean about the door…if you hadn’t said, I don’t think I’d have known what it was. I don’t really know how to fix it though. Perhaps you could try having it 1/2 way open or something? It would be hard to do, but it would make it a lot clearer.
As for the sofa, I think it looks great. I’d never dare attempt anything like that, but it works. I think I see how you did it, so I might try and duplicate it sometime. Maybe. Possibly. But probably not, because I’m lazy like that.
Overall, great pic. I really like your style and the room looks very believable, with only the door-that-is-not-a-door as a minor issue. You know, if you can’t get it right, just take it out. The picture’ll look fine without it.
Here is one that I would like some feed back on. I just finished her last night. http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=82065&d=1328244917 Luranna Mejeer AKA The Succubus is a Redesign of an older character from a Palladium Books Hero’s Unlimited Game. She has the Powers of Flight: Winged, Extraordinary Physical Prowess, Extraordinary Physical Endurance, Alter Facial Features and Physical Stature and Disruptive touch. and she is a highly skilled Computer Hacker thus the equipment on her belt.
Not sure how I feel about this one. I was trying out some things with this one. Using colors I don’t normally use and trying to do a little more with the background than usual. Didn’t really have a direction. Thoughts?
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81671&d=1326526720
Kick a$$ is all I can say.
Making thing out of other things is hard to do sometimes. Try making them alone to see how they look then put then in the picture. That is why for the most part I keep notes on my project, so I can rebuild them. Also look at real objects to see what they look like, it helps to stop and look around sometimes when you are making something.
What direction was you heading in? Can you tell us a little about the picture?
Like I said in the forums, sweet. It is very well put together. Great colors.
I like the background and the composition of the character, but I’m not sure about the pink in particular. To me it seems to fight a little with the other colors.
It is nice. Maybe watch for object showing behind other ones. Plus I think I would have mask the foot wear to the legs, so it looks like separate items.
I’m going to get to as many of these as I can during my lunch hour, so apologies in advance if they’re more brief than usual.
I definitely think this design is superior in a lot of ways to the original. You can tell it’s a hawk on his chest and not a frightened llama, for instance. The Native American elements work well, though I’d like to see a tad more of its influence — the fringes, for instance, while clumsily rendered in the reference photo I think were a nice touch and would go well here if used in spots.
I also wonder how it would look if that neat hawk head logo were expanded and masked onto the top part of the tunic.
I like the facial tats and the wings. Overall it’s a good improvement!
@Dionne Jinn: That looks great. As Kaylin had posted, I didn’t know there was a door there. I read the info that you gave about the picture after I looked at it, so I returned to see if I could see the door. What I had originally thought it was, was the trim. If you can’t figure out how to make it look more like a door, it looks just fine as the trim. You could continue the bottom part, extending it to behind the furniture.
As always, an excellent illustration rich with color and meaning. I like the dark background allowing the figure to pop to the front.
My main concerns with it are in the pose, specifically that it’s hard to tell exactly what is going on with the body. With the head in perfect profile I have trouble understanding if we’re looking at this person’s back or front, for instance. If it’s from the back, then you’d see the back of the neck in front of the head, but here we don’t.
That’s the main thing for me that needs some attention, clearing up the pose, as it detracts from some of the other cool elements in the image.
Outstanding! One of my favorite characters of yours, which is saying a lot. The pose totally makes it. I appreciate the attention paid to the positioning of the feet, the turning of the biceps, the way the cape reinforces the stance. The colors are great, the items perfectly chosen, and the overall impact tremendous. Great job!
The basic story is that an oil drilling facility in the Arctic has woken up a monster. A trucker on his way to the facility has broken down, and has to wait for backup. Meanwhile, said monster is about to eat him. The reason I entered it into the contest is because it reminded me of the typical “nature bites greedy corporation in the butt” scenario. I know it doesn’t really say “greed”, as per the contest guidelines, but no matter.
Wow! That’s a fantastic scene, one of the best I’ve seen come out of HM. Very innovative use of items in unconventional ways. The figures fit well into the environment (though the blue-skinned one seems a bit uncomfortable).
The only elements that don’t quite work as well as the rest are the ends of the couch. The lines on the scrolls end up so thick due to expansion that they kind of jump out at you.
Really nice job though, I like it!
I have to admit that I am confused by this scene. I’m not sure of the figure-ground relationships (where things are in relation to each other in space), like if the big blue rip in the middle is a hole in a surface or a maw of a creature actually bursting out or what. I don’t know how the black cityscape at the top fits in relationship to everything else — we seem to be on a planetary surface, far enough out that we can see the curve of the sphere, yet we can see girders?
I’m afraid this one is going to need lots of work to get up to the high standard of your other submissions, which have all been really well thought-out and executed.
working on shadowing. i think the knees dont work in particular:
http://fav.me/d4m4zjm
Neat looking character! I like the costume itself, the stockings, the wings, the facial tats, all of it. Very well put-together. The scene is strong, too, you made good use of the building props to make a convincing environment.
My main reservations with it are in terms of the coloring. I like the color concepts, but they’re all so close in tone that some of the details get lost. I see it particularly in the shin area — you’ve got the maroon straps hanging down with black outlines into black fishnet into black boots with maroon highlights. It creates a bit of a visual traffic jam there, exacerbated by the way the legs pinch close together there, right where the horizontal lines of the building edge come in.
I am wondering if maybe varying the line color of the figure herself, or conversely the lines of the building behind her, would help her pop more from the background layer. But some variation in tone between the basic color values within her outfit would help too — lighter and darker tones of maroon, for instance.
But again, great character design and scene setting. The coloring is close, too, but I think it could be even stronger with some tweaking.
I’ll agree with you that the knees don’t work. The problem is that knees tend to follow the feet when the legs rotate, so outward pointed feet with forward facing knees look weird. Specially when you put the legs out like that. It almost looks broken. The bad thing is I don’t really have a suggestion for you on how to fix it….
Love the environment! Having the figure popping out above and below the scenery box is a great technique, it really builds visual interest. Everything in that box is outstanding.
I like the coloring in general, but the skin in general makes her look semi-transparent, like she’s a ghost. But then the wings and the pink dress are BAM! in your face vivid, which tends to make her look even more ethereal. Then you’ve got the gold shin guard thingies also very solid and vividly colored.
If it were me, I’d try to make her skin more solid and vivid; decrease the opacity of the spell effects around her hands so you can see more of her and they look more like energy than solid objects; and tone down the opacity of the wings as well as making them a bit larger and angled upward more, so they don’t dominate the figure. Having the wing tops also break the plane of the scenery box would help that whole illusion be even more effective.
I think it’s a great start and a fun approach!
I knew the perspective and scaling was the biggest weakness in “Tragoedia Arctica”. I’m a total newb when it comes to it. I didn’t want the city to be too large, as I wanted the monster to be the focus (it’s supposed to be under ice, rushing upwards), but I also didn’t want an unidentifiable black blob at the top of the scene.
The tilt of the surface was another thing. It’s not meant to be a view from orbit, more like a bird’s eye view. I should have probably used a background element with rougher edges.
But enough of my rambling. I shall return to the drawing board. Thanks for the critique, Jeff!
I think if this were in black and white it would be outstanding, because the character design is very good. I sound like a broken record today, but for me the problem is in the coloring, specifically that all the tones are really close. If you were to open this in PhotoShop and desaturate it so it was all grayscale, I think it’d become super clear how close all those values are to each other.
I think the easiest and fastest fix is to go with much lighter grays for the flesh, so the other elements can pop more.
All righty, back to work! I’ll catch submissions after this either tonight or tomorrow morning.
Thanks to everyone who’s providing feedback as well!
thanks yall for the suggustions.
Some thoughts how to improve this character?
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=80702&d=1319231696
http://i891.photobucket.com/albums/ac111/Kicktar/DianziMoshu.png
Dianzi Moshu, cyborg wizard. Started out as an entry to one of those random name contests, but ultimately decided against it.
BTW, Jeff, I will try any critique you give, even if I don’t *think* it’s right.
I like all the cyborg parts on him, but the rest feels a little too flat for me. Maybe some other items or a little change in color…
Was actually going for an American Indian look
I totally forgot about that
It may not be noticeable but I gave him solid brown eyes… I can see that (full chest insignia) working
and Jeff don’t forget the armors (when you get enough time)
Also if anyone has a suggestion on what could use for fringe on hm3, I can see in my mind’s eye where they could go.
Continuing with my Steampunk-era team, this was my energy blaster, Lady Bethany Elerby, who has been given the ability to generate lightening and call forth storms.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81531&d=1325703015
The greek Goddess Athena.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81220&d=1322866417
love it
i used the lyrics to my favorite song “Country Badass” by Cody Mccarver to make a charcter here r the lyrics i used:
born on the banks of the tenesee river 20 something years ago
i got a chip on each shoulder. momma tattood on my chest mister that was all she wrote.
http://i1107.photobucket.com/albums/h385/R_A_F/HEROMACHINE/superheroes/CountryBadass2.png
Okay, I see it now.
This is great, I love it! but use some owl figures because its her symbol and she must look like virgin warrior. its more like amazones or gladiator. she must be look like queen, like princesses of olympos. Because she is goddess of strategy, virgin daughter of zeus, symbol of difference and my favorite goddess of greek mythology 🙂
Here is an attempted cover. Now I made it in black and white except for the red, but with a real lack of other objects, it may be hard to notice. It is my first real attempt at a more art based cover than an action shot, but here it is.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=82063&d=1328235442
my international heroes(a few anyway) critique whichever you think needs the most work.
Italia:
http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/italy.png/297979718/649×489/italy.png
Hungary:
http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/Hungary.png/297979654/661×499/Hungary.png
Deutschland:
http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/Deutchland.png/297979420/665×502/Deutchland.png
(i hope you like Deutschland’s spandex Lederhosen)
🙂
http://i891.photobucket.com/albums/ac111/Kicktar/HM/DianziMoshu2.png
Added some insignia and darkened his pants, not sure about the pant-insignia, though.
Italia looks too period and not superhero-y enough
That’s not italy flag. And i don’t know how join a dare devil style char for hungary :D. But Deutschland is cool.
Here’s my last (vaguely finished) character. Am trying to work on the gradients/textures (seeing as it’s a black costume in a night-time scene) and would appreciate advice….
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81925&d=1327778731
Here is one I don’t want Jeff to critique, but one I more wanted to show off. A progression piece using art styles and costume designs to set off the time periods. If anyone sees something to be critiqued, fire away.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=81981&d=1327977907
I remade a few thing but i really don’t know how shown better the pose.
http://img189.imageshack.us/img189/1104/shikiremade.png
I love it, Pesky! The light blue lines in his skin rock. I like the wave pattern on the background element, too. The build of the creature is spot-on. I honestly think it looks great, there’s not much more to do unless you start adding more ornaments, belt devices, bumps on the skin and such, but then you run the very real risk of cluttering it up. I say leave it as-is because it’s pretty darn cool already.
hmm. i see what you mean. i dont know how to do a good one without being too stereo-typical. i’ll see…
i love how the tattoos seem to glow!
This is a strong character design, in that you’ve kept it stripped down to the essentials needed to “tell the story” of who this is. The glows around the hands are neat.
I like the cyborg hand more than the foot, which for some reason seems wimpier than it ought to. Maybe because the drawing itself was turned more than the other shoe, or possibly because it’s at the end of sweatpants that hide more of the leg so it almost reads more as a shoe than a foot.
The only other minor detail I’d note is that the back of the hood is missing.
But, it’s a solid illustration.
Mary Poppins is PISSED!
Seriously, I like the illustration. She looks good, the colors are nice, and I definitely get the message about her powers. I dig the idea behind the umbrella, too, you did a nice job assembling that (though I wonder if maybe the umbrella part shouldn’t go down further on the shaft).
The only comment I’d make for an enhancement would be in the lightning. Both of the bolts are the same color and size, yet one is in her hand while the other seems to be almost behind the umbrella. I get some confusion there, as I initially read the left-hand bolt as being in the background. I’d also like to see some more oomph in the bolts rather than being solid colors, something like a solid white core surrounded by a semi transparent blue outside. I can’t remember how those are set up between color1, color2, and the line color, though, so that might be tough to pull off.
But other than the bolt stuff I think it’s great!
i like it, but maybe if the green pant insignia were a wee bit transparent, it would look more like part of the pants. other than that, i love it!
Here is a little art asset I made for alavacascus, the first recipient of the DAMN! (dblade’s Art Manic Ninja!) award. It’s a weapon from the God Eater Burst game that he likes. It’s still a work in progress so feel free to comment.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=82106&d=1328306926
Improved version of my earlier entry. Did some rework on the sofa and added a sneaky little brother to make the door appear as a door way. I like it better now. Anything else?
http://www.heromachine.com/wp-content/legacy/forum-image-uploads/dionne-jinn/SHInt141.png
Thanks bro 🙂
I´m glad you like it. And about the figures, i didn´t want to do the typical stereotype greek goddess with the long dress and long hair, i tried to give my own personal touches and create my Athena version. But also i´d like to take your suggestions and give it a little classic greek mythology but a lost all my savings, and that is ………. frustrating.
i certainly wouldnt want to be attacked by that!
🙂
My OC, Sandstorm. As a soldier in Afghanistan, she got tagged by chemical weapons and caught in a sandstorm which changed her molecular structure to being Silicate-based. She can now change any part of her anatomy into sand or even become a living sand storm.
http://fav.me/d4oiigc
Looks like winter suck out of me all imagination and recently I can’t think of anything new.
So here you go some of my old work.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=78750&d=1309721318
“Here is one I don’t want Jeff to critique, but one I more wanted to show off.”
Power User Masterclass, then? I’d be interested in that….
http://i891.photobucket.com/albums/ac111/Kicktar/HM/DianziMoshu2-1.png
Third rendition, now with more visible cyborg foot!
Actually, I was looking at a lot of Victorian England period paintings to get the ensemble correct, and several of the ladies were carrying parasols with long shafts and small umbrellas with ruffled fringes, so I tried to recreate that a little.
I do see what you mean about the lightning bolts though, so I’ll try playing with that a bit more.
I’m having a hard time getting her hands to look right as she hugs the book to her chest. I tried various hands but so far this is the best I’ve managed. Any ideas?
http://i935.photobucket.com/albums/ad197/girlwiththelime/ravenclaw.png
I know you try to make your version of Athena, and you made it but you dont made athena you made a woman version of ares. Athena more complicated than war goddess. Like I said, she is symbol of difference, she is like harmony of innocence and virulence. I know that figures, typical things make us little bit more unorginal but if we dont use them what we made, far away than what we try to made. With all my respect and dont misunderstand me but I just give you an advice about how to use “Athena” concept.
http://i961.photobucket.com/albums/ae99/dhabirunner/JokerzWild.png
Jokerz Wild
I love the picture, Pesky. The thing that throws me however, is the light-colored discoloration on his sides and legs. Looks like he could have contracted Ich, just like a pet goldfish would.
dblade, how exactly does one hold that thing without pulling back a bloody stump?
excellent!
Okay I don’t know if any of you remember this character from a critique a ways back but I finally redid her and I was trying to figure out what to add for this post so here, see what you think.
http://i1224.photobucket.com/albums/ee363/cameron_stanley_84/My%20Characters/TOOL-DarkElf.png
BTW I am just catching up on here and don’t have much time so I will just say to all, very well done, I like the art posted here so far. See ya!
Here’s a concept for a character that I might enter in the inevitable Vanity contest.
http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7021/6812200981_dce003dd37_z.jpg
The idea is that she is bent on becoming ‘perfect’, so she kills models, cuts out part of their skin, and replaces her own skin with the patch.
you may have to build you own hands, using the masking feature some insignia and a couple different hands for each one. I built my own hand once for a character and it was a real pain in the arse, but it’s do able.
And all my freeworks. No pose,no effects,no background. Just character 🙂
Aidan The Hunter
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Aidan.jpg
Akhan The Shaman
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Akhan.jpg
Godric The Pathfinder
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Godric.jpg
Herion The Monk
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Herion.jpg
Lord Theodor The Lord of Hunters (Armored)
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/LordTheodor.jpg
Elenia The Arcane Archer
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Elenia.jpg
Asenia The Enchantress
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Asenia.jpg
Siana The Cleric
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Siana.jpg
Lyanna The Witch
http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc364/newerlie/freeworks/Lyanna.jpg
Don’t look at me. I’m just the midwife of this thing. 🙂
Understood.
Just saying, if I can’t figure it out, I’m unlikely to use the asset for my characters.
However, since it’s alavacascus’ prize, it’s his job to figure out how it gets used. 😀
Looking at it, I would guess that it is a nasty vibro sword. You hold it by what looks like a gun barrel but I would say is actually the swords hilt. Reason I say it is a Vibro sword is because it looks like it takes a clip but since there isn’t a grip to hold it as a gun the ONLY why I can see it being used as a sword that vibrates at a high frequency so it does my damage as it slices through stuff. Thanks just a guess of course but that is how I intend to use it in the future.
Tarkabarka:That’s not italy flag. And i don’t know how join a dare devil style char for hungary 😀 . But Deutschland is cool.
what do you mean? i looked up italy flag and it showed that. did i mix up the order of the colors? and what did you mean by “don’t know how join a dare devil style char for hungary”?
actually, Tarkabarka, i see my mistake now with the flag. i put the stripes the wrong way. but since i cant figure a way to make him look more superhero-y, i’ll just leave it, anyway. thanks, though.
Your flag is rotated 90*
EDIT: Oh, nevermind.
Awhile back I was fooling with HM3 and made a UFO. Picture is below.
http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/1662/ufo.png
Let me know what you guys think. I’ve got the text code for it if anyone wants to improve on it.
Mr. Q
to critique
The Twins:Valerie the vampire and Hillary the werewolf:
http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/257/d/2/the_twins_by_karzykyle-d49u8dt.png
not to critique
http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/300/1/8/psycho_werewolf_by_karzykyle-d4e4sij.jpg
The pattern you used makes her look “woody” than “sandy”
http://freethespam.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/atomicpunk-foosball.png
Late to the party. This is a long post. Apologies to anyone that I missed.
@zarae: Love it. Might want to try an alternate pose with her left hand grabbing the whip handle.
@ams: Just wow! Amazing pose. One minor knit. His right shoe doesn’t have the same ankle as the left.
@Asder: Overall solid. Personally don’t care much for the extra long hair. The kneepads clash with the rest of her armor. Maybe move the spear in front of the cape but still behind the skirt. If she’s throwing her arms back, no matter what her strength, the spear would still tangle against the cape.
@Captain Kicktar: I love the third incarnation of Dianzi Moshu. However, I would match the right shoe with the left. But that’s a personal taste.
@Darthtoa: Are the patches supposed to be skin grafts? It’s a real neat effect. Try matching the color of the grafts to the one on the left thigh. For Color 3 (the outline), use a darker skin tone or even a subdued red instead of black lines for a scar tissue effect.
@Dionne Jinn: Both are fantastic! Definitely the revised version is the better one.
@Mr. Q: Nice. You should post that and the accompanying text in the Recipes Section of the Forums as a “Companion.”
@Pesky: Love the horns on the knees. Very primal. Maybe some spots on the arms as well for a more uniform look with the legs and abs (try masking Patterns to the arms).
@LordGrimm: Great re-imagining. Don’t understand why the eyes are solid brown, though?
@Tarkabarka: I like both versions. The pose is great. The head is rotated to the point where her neck would probably snap. I don’t know if there is anyway to avoid that.
@TOOL: Overall solid. Dark Elf’s hair doesn’t have a consistant tint. Maybe rotate the flames up for a more natural “heat rises” effect. Play with some shadow using the fire as a light source?
@Trailerhood_Outlaw01: Might want to set two of the colors to 0. The font shadows don’t seem to work as a tattoo. Love the smoke effect. Adds a bit of life to an otherwise stiff character.
@Vampyrist: Love the Astroman Progression. By the latest version, I would lose the belt or re-style it. Again, personal preference.
@FRM: The cowboy boots don’t work for an Italian swordsman. Try different styles.
@headlessgeneral: Overall solid. Her facial expression doesn’t quite match, though. The boxed background works great.
@Lime: I had a similar problem with a character grabbing a newspaper. I will post a masking technique later.
@Meniukas: Might want to make the campfire more transparent. The solid color overwhelms the scene.
@Myro: Overall solid. Jeff already mentioned the unnatural uniformity of the lightning. Might want to narrow her dress. It is a smidge wider than her coat.
@kyle: The werewolf needs work with the hands and the feet. Try masking her hands to the gargoyle and building ledge. Like she is gripping the edges.
@Albannach: I got the concept of an oil right and pipeline. I would add some rocks as ice breaking apart in the water. Maybe a pattern like a rush of current.
@alphaalpharomeo: The costume is great. Unfortunately, the colors just scream “DC.” A different scheme would go far to break that association.
@dblade: I can this as a one-shot-buzzsaw-your-arm-off on one side or a very unbalanced cleaver from the other. Cool design, but I’m just too practical to see it actually working. ;9
@McKnight57: I see the “granular” effect that you are trying with Sandstorm’s skin and costume. I think it makes the picture look too busy. Try shifting the sand texture to the windstorm?
I’ve made some improvements to my Frosty Man, Steve: http://i.imgur.com/MkwNV.jpg
As well as one of my entries for the Wrath contest, simply called “Fury”. http://i.imgur.com/2kN5D.jpg
I’d actually like to get a critique on her more than I would on Steve, but that’s mainly because when I showed the picture to my father he claimed she looked like a man.
Here’s another in my “Entertainers” super-team (the Martial artist): http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/mm156/Tuldabar/Heros/Quiet.png I call him “Quiet.” He’s a sort of Tibetan monk who had his toungue removed after being expelled from his order, and ws picked up by the team.
I really like his design, but he just needs, I don’t know, SOMETHING. I’m also stumped on backround ideas.
I wanted to give him a more than human look and a hawks eyes are actually fixed in their head (see link below)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Accipitridae
I appreciate the suggestion. I’ll try a few different options, yours included.
Pesky: Engage him–have the foot crushing something for scale, circumstance, and emotion or at least put some food in one of those hands. . . and add a background. The char’s great; the only thing I would change is to make the ‘forehead’ tat smaller, within the ‘forehead facet’ protrusion.
Dionne Jinn: sneaky brother is better than what I would have suggested–perspective furniture or wallpaper [pattern] in other room, but the couch ends? look through possibilities of oversized items from hair or male ‘plastic man’ arms flattened. [layer x with all 3 colors Y, layer x+1 scale 5% down all 3 colors Y-lighter. Hang coat on one of them.]
Headlessgeneral:Ethereal creatures need more context than others–show magic’s effect on something. Is this a Fae?
Lime:Besides building hands–cover the knuckles with a over-shoulder cloak?
I only Joke. No problem with that picture. I glad you choose hungary. I personally know how hard to make anything for hungary.
Wow! I like your UFO a lot. Still trying to figure out how did you do it…
I hope I’m not too late
http://fc06.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/035/8/0/twilight_crusader_by_malfar-d4olo2f.jpg
how about this?
http://frmartworks.wikispaces.com/file/view/italyfixed.png/298383718/670×506/italyfixed.png
and i fixed the flag.
“Practical”!?! Do you hear that? That’s the roar of a million anime fans calling for your head.
You forgot my homeland: Austria!
http://img860.imageshack.us/img860/451/austriaheld.png
Name: Sisspak
Age: 25 years old
Skills: Have strong sense, can see in darkness, so fast that she can parry the gunfire and hide so good that nobdy see her.
Here motto: Hide, keep calm and kill with first shoot.
Hobby: She like barbecue and swim on cold day and drive ski on hot day. She dont like folk music, but she like to go on a folk festival for good beer.
And never stay back and surprise her, she kill you…oh, i forgot, she can hide, nobody found here. But when…
Why i tell to hard to make 😀
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=79748&d=1313429991
i made this long ago.
Great work as always, Asder. I really like the way you’ve layered the colors on this one, with the blue cape behind the white skirt then the brown clothing. The figure pops. I like her expression a lot, too, she looks like she definitely means business.
Good job!
I like how you’ve carried the concept through to the background and some of the little touches here like the smoke from the cigarette. Living in the country myself most of the time I have certainly run into this guy’s relatives!
I think he could use more, though. Maybe a ratty hat, or a white sleeveless undershirt, to sell the idea of the concept even better.
Happy to see you joining the forum and thanks for sharing a nice illustration!
Interesting! I should take the idea of doing a cover and make a contest out of it …
I think you’re right, the red makes it hard to tell it’s black and white (or grayscale, really) everywhere else, especially since it’s a darker scene by nature. Plus the red glow is so big and doesn’t follow the contours of the buildings, so it looks more like a mist. Which if it is a mist, great! But the footprints coming out of it make me think it was supposed to be either a glow or a pool of blood or something. Similarly, the glow on the letters on the building make it not look like the letters are on the wall but rather floating over it.
So I think it does need more work to get the concept across, as it’s unclear to me exactly what it is I am supposed to be seeing.
Per my longstanding practice, if someone puts more than one image into a request without indicating which one they want my input on, I just take the first one.
The character is neat! He looks very “Princess Bride” by way of the Three Musketeers, which is a great combination. I like all the costuming and color choices, you pulled off the concept nicely.
The obvious critique, which I think others have pointed out, is that the bars on the flag are going the wrong way. Here’s the actual Italian flag — not how the stripes go up and down, not side to side.
Also, I’m not a huge fan of the highlighting you put on the legs. It gives them an almost metallic sheen, when it looks like it ought to be cloth.
Otherwise, great job!
Love that face! You really captured head movement there, very well done.
I like the glow off her energy blasts, that seems how it would look at night. You’ve done a good job with the highlighting glow on her costume parts closest to the blast as well.
I think you’ve set yourself a tough challenge, as a lot of what sells a nighttime scene is the inking, which can’t be controlled in HM. Typically you want to position blocks of black around the figure so the parts that are in the light stand out.
I will say I don’t particularly care for the clouds in the background; they’re probably the most cartoonish, expressionistic drawing style I put in there, and combined with the hyper realistic buildings it creates a bit of tension.
I like it, especially the clasp. Belt is a smidge high. Might also want to apply a lower shadow pattern to the green floor design so it blends more with the shadowing of the background.
Yes, much better. Great work with the Zyping.
Neat design, especially the headdress.
Awesome! Left leg is a little bent. Try re-positioning the left hand (example, palm down or a closed fist). Palm up works really well here. Still, the hand position gives a subtle effect. Give it a try. I think you’ll see what I mean.
Excellent design and costume. Even though she’s a hacker, the keyboard throws me for a curve. I find myself focusing more on it than the overall design.
Sorry, didn’t read close enough our your character’s motif. The skin graft colors make sense. I think that “scar tissue” instead of black lines would work better.
Time to go shovel some more snow…
Nice!
Love it!
I like the concept, and it definitely comes across as a sand storm desert type of scene. I don’t get the sense that she’s IN a sand storm, though, with the big grin and the wide open eyes and the hair perfectly coifed. Also, with everything in the same range of brown tones she’s a little hard to make out. I know you’d expect that in a sand storm, but at the end of the day we have to have an illustration that stands on its own, and if you can’t make out the figure from the environment that can be a problem.
Check out this image by DiCicatriz, the way he patterned the dirt on top of the cloud for a sandy effect that I think works well.
But like I said, it’s a nice design and a great idea.
This is going to sound a lot like the commentary I just made on McKnight’s, because I think it has a lot of the same issues in that it’s hard to separate out the figure from the environment.
The other thing is that the yellow flame in front is particularly opaque and doesn’t read as fire.
thanks, everybody, for the critiques!
Now here is a new version of it. The red, which is supposed to be a blood pool, is now smaller to hopefully convey blood. As for the letters, they are floating to a point, they’re the title of the book/piece.
I also added some more background items, to hopefully better portray the gray scale.
http://forums.ugo.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=82139&d=1328382615
You’re right, Lime, the hands aren’t quite right, are they? The only alternative I could think of was the cartoon-style hand, the very last one on the middle row of the last page in the female set. That seems to be at a slightly better angle …
Love the character, btw!
I like the more super-heroic look of the guy instead of an outright clown like you often see. I also like the way you have the heart and spade nested, that makes for a neat design. I wonder, though, if there’s a way to nest them both inside a larger club that would be masked to the top, which would then give you just one of each suit instead of the clubs being there twice …
I like the idea of orange and green, but I think maybe a less neon green might be better as the main color there.
Good job!
Very nice! I like the stylized thinness of the figure. Her costume and items are all good, too. The interaction between her and the cat are also very natural and effective.
My only comment for improvement might be to figure out a position for the right arm that doesn’t align with the baldric — things get a little bunched up around there. It might also be nice to have something on that side of the composition to tie together the top part and the bottom, like if her right arm were more out to the side holding the flaming staff away, so it comes down below the waist. I don’t know, just something to add some zip from the upper body to the lower part of the illustration where it’s a little heavy on the side of the cat.
Love it, though!
I’m a little hesitant to do a critique for a future contest entry, but I guess it’s ok.
I love this design if it’s for Vanity, because of the play against the metal mask. And everything that’s present seems to fit with the concept. But, it does leave me feeling like it’s a little plain somehow, like she should have more stuff on her. Maybe even just a very simple glow behind her to set her off?
I like what you have so far, though!
As per standard policy, when someone posts more than one image and doesn’t indicate which is for critique, I’ll just take the first one.
I like Aidan! His gear is great, particularly the ankh-dagger. That’s neat. The colors are well done and he gives a menacing impression.
The only spot that might need some tweaking is where the boots overlap the coat, as those colors are all very similar and thus you lose the footwear a bit.
Otherwise, outstanding!
It looks like a UFO, all right! The basics are all there, but I think it needs some oomph. Maybe a highlight or glow effect in the dome, maybe some circuitry or paneling somehow masked onto the sides?
Looks good as is, of course, it just seems like there’s another level you could take it to if you’re so inclined.
To any and all Whovians, how does this one work? It’s my HM3 version of the 10th Doctor. Sorry, but it’s the best I could do with what we have on HM3. At least Jeff gave us a TARDIS console.
http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/035/8/e/the_10th_doctor_by_heinz57xc-d4onlr4.png
What a fun illustration! I love the spirit of playfulness you’ve brought to this, though of course it’s also a nice composition and character study as well. The figures are both good and I like their interaction with each other.
I’m not a huge fan of that sky and background, but that’s just me — I hate those particular drawings, the way I did them.
I do wonder about the crouching figure’s feet — it seems like they ought to be paws or at least have toes, as without them I have to think they’re shoes or socks but they don’t have a top. Anyway, they’re a little confusing.
Thanks for sharing it, it’s a fun piece!
Yowza! Yeah, she looks pretty angry … that’s one wedding I am glad I was unable to attend. I like the clever use of the mohawk hair along with a regular set to make it look like she’s holding him up that way.
Her expression is great, too! Although, I have to say, I agree with your dad a little in that she looks a little more male than female. Probably it’s the nose, which is wider than you’re used to seeing. And the lips — on her wedding day you’d think she’d have on some lipstick. On the other hand, she just beheaded someone so maybe she doesn’t care particularly.
The only other bit that I think could use some improvement is the veil, which seems more like a space helmet since it’s separated from the air by a fair bit of space, and it’s so regular in contour.
I like it, though, the image has a lot of spirit!
First of all, LOVE the face/head. He has the look of a real guy who’s seen some stuff in his day. I also agree that the basic design is good, he’s very convincing and he looks interesting.
For me, the main thing you could do to give him something is in some of the color choices. The main pants color is the same as you’ve used for some of the hilts, for instance. But there’s no way those are the same materials, so the user’s eye flattens the image out seeing them both in different parts for different things.
I also think you should try a different “highlight” color for the pants, as the current selection is so close to the main boot color that they also flatten each other a bit.
My final color note is that I lose the blue sash tie almost completely in the black. Plus it’s the only place you use that color, which makes me wonder why it’s there and why it’s not the same as the rest of the belt.
Hope that helps! I don’t know that you need more stuff to make it pop, so much as just some slight color tweaking.
I like the character design, and I like the colors. The only thing I’d try switching up would be to make the boots blue or gray and the pants green — with the footwear the same color as the platform the composition ends up looking bottom-heavy.
But good job, I like the design and the layout a lot!
I do think that’s better, but the glow just isn’t working as blood spatter to me. I think I’d go with one of the other items instead of a gradient, I know I’ve seen various puddles used before. Maybe one of the Auras that has bubbles or ovals in it, scaled down and all three colors the same red?
All right, folks, time to draw this one to a close. Many thanks to all who participated either with critiques or by providing illustrations.
I’m sorry it took a day to get to some of them.
You should make that your Signature! :>
Here are a few characters I’ve made:
Stiletto:
http://www.majhost.com/gallery/bobobo1/Rorschach/stiletto_fully_clothed_yellow.png
http://www.majhost.com/gallery/bobobo1/Rorschach/stiletto_fully_clothed.png
And an unnamed character I’ve made for a First Person game:
http://www.majhost.com/gallery/bobobo1/Rorschach/fpshero.png
LMAO! I say do it, dblade.
definitely!
@The Atomic Punk, thanks for the ideas, and @Jeff, same to you! Maybe I will redo her again sometime.
She actually is wearing lipstick: unfortunately it ended up being hard to see against the redness of her rage-face. the veil brought me untold amounts of frustration since I had no idea how to make one and ended up using capes and hoods. I’ll try to see if I can make it more disheveled.