Poll Position: Evil!

Our Poll Position question this week is pretty basic:


On to the completely fruitless, yet nonetheless entertaining, speculation!

Evil is more than a bad haircut and a rainstorm ...

  • Batman: I'll be honest, sometimes it's hard to tell that Batman isn't already a bad guy. He fights cops, causes unmitigated property damage, has a complete disregard for laws and rights, beats the living hell out of everyone he meets, and operates strictly according to his own code of justice. But to be fair, he does protect innocents and stops the worst of the worst. I would see Evil Batman as Bruce finally deciding that so-called "super heroes" are actually causing more harm than they prevent, and so need to be brought down. Why would humanity succumb to rule by these aliens, mutants, and overlords who govern by might? Batman is the only one allowed to do that! So, yeah, it would be interesting, but not really, because it's not that different from how he is now. Pass.
  • Iron Man: Like Batman, Tony Stark already is pretty much a law unto himself. To his credit, he does his best to keep the horrific weapons that he is responsible for developing from wreaking more havoc. But he's also not that far away from the dark side himself. I would see Evil Iron Man as taking over as using his vast financial resources to run for, and secure, the Presidency of the United States in an effort to "protect" people from the scourge of meta-humans. Oh, wait ...
  • Spider-Man: I know that in theory they tried this in "Spider-Man 3", but as the caption says, you need more than black clothes, a bad haircut, and a sneer to be a real bad guy. I could see Peter finally just getting sick of the hate and oppression he gets from New Yorkers and saying "screw it". I think his evil would not be as much Dr. Doom-level grandiose ambitions of global rule, as Kingpin-level "I need to protect myself and the people I love, and I needs to get paid" type stuff. Could be interesting. They pretty much did this with Daredevil relatively recently and it was a great series.
  • Superman: Yes, I know, "Red Son" and all that. And it was cool. I want more. Good Superman is boring, I'd love to see him take out the JLA some day when he got bored. Again, wait, that's been done, in "Invincible". And it was cool.
  • Thor: Gods are, to some degree, above the whole petty "label" thing mortals put on them. Too often people forget that Thor isn't really Dr. Blake, he's really a freaking GOD. I could see Thor, like the Batman scenario above, finally deciding that humanity has fallen too far from their true path. Yes, he'd put down governments and conquer everyone, but it would be for their own good.
  • Wolverine: Evil Wolverine wouldn't be that different from Good Wolverine. He'd just stop holding back when he went up against the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, kill most of them, and then rule the survivors. Also, he'd arrange an accident for Cyclops and steal Jean for himself, finally.
  • Wonder Woman: How could someone as supposedly obsessed with the rights of women NOT be fighting against most of the world's governments at this point?! Evil Wonder Woman would not be so much evil, as opposed to most of the cultural actors she sees as being responsible for the subjugation of women. And it would be cool, because she'd get a Mohawk and wear BLACK y'all!

So there you have it. I'd frankly choose Wonder Woman because otherwise, she's fairly dull. Although a truly pissed off Thor finally deciding to kick humanity's ass would be fun too.

The worst part of Wonder Woman would be having to see the horrible, skin-tight leather S&M outfits they'd put her in, since apparently that's "evil". Whatever.

So who would you choose?

16 Responses to Poll Position: Evil!

  1. The Imp says:

    Yeah, I’ve gotta go with Wonder Woman too. Mainly just cause of the costume possibilities. 🙂

  2. Syzyx says:

    I tossed my vote in with Wolverine. Guy’s already a murderer/terrorist/thug. It wouldn’t be much of a step.

  3. Jake says:

    I think Wonder Woman would be interesting. I think that she is a rather ill defined character. She is a warrior. She has killed in cold blood. She is extremely powerful. Yet, her character is still difficult to pin down. I think this leaves room for a transformation of her character.

    The thing about the change is that I would not this to be an overnight process. Hal Jordan suddenly becoming Parallax because of his city blowing up would not cut it. Wonder woman would have to start questioning things she had taken for granted. Then she would have to get angry at what she discovered. This would cause a distance between her and the more heroic characters. I see her more as a third party than joining up with a bunch of villains. I think there is a lot of potential there.

  4. Danny Beaty says:

    I pick Thor. He could whip-up a global lightning storm that would be catastrophic. It would also be interesting to see how all of Earth’s mightiest heroes would try to defeat Thor, assuming the god of thunder could be defeated.

  5. tristan says:

    I think there was already a storey line where thor took over the world but then he worked out he was wrong thousands of years later ans used time travel to fix things, so i voted spidey!!

  6. Matt says:

    I pick Wonder Woman mainly because I can’t stand her and would enjoy her being killed. But for some reason I have no idea why…

  7. TopHat says:

    Spidey. After reading Back in Black, it’s apparent just how nasty old Parker can be. Beating up cops, using Jeeps as projectie weapons, dangling people out windows, hanging a man upside down in a sewer full of hungry rats while telling him all about food chains, beating the Kingpin to a pulp in front of an entire prison.

    Now imagine all that x10, and you have evil Peter Parker.

  8. X-stacy says:

    I considered Wonder Woman, but I do get tired of black leather and S&M gear being the costume for evil women. TopHat swayed me to the Spider-view instead.

  9. Kalkin says:

    Evil Spider-man is my favorite. I’d like to see him finally get fed up with constant masochism and pacifism. Another interesting choice would be Superman, but Plutonian from Irredeemable covers that already. Batman, Wolverine and Ironman could work as villains, but indeed that would not be much of a change, just a little step further. Thor and Wonder woman are not really humans as such, so them changing sides is less psychologically thrilling. Those two are already basically alien minds comparing to humans – although Wonder woman’s war against malehood of the world would make a few interesting stories.

  10. Jeff Hebert says:

    I don’t think of Wonder Woman as non-human at all. She’s very much a human, just from a tribe of people separated out from the mainstream of global culture in the past and with a direct relationship with the Greek gods.

    Am I wrong on that? I haven’t read the book in years, so it’s entirely possible I am way out of date.

  11. Gene says:

    Went with Wonder Woman; interesting costume potential aside, we could use a decent female Villain. She’s not that interesting as a hero, maybe she’ll be a good fit. I know the lasso brings about images of a Black S&M Ouffit, but it could be red leather…mini skirt…..Heels…….
    And it wouldn’t be difficult for her to gather a legion of Minions. Mostly male of course….

  12. EnderX says:

    Depends on how you’re defining human, and what the various retcons have done to her. Assuming the last origin I heard holds true, she’s an animated statue granted certain paradivine powers…but one raised in the culture you’re describing. How that affects ‘human’-level is unknown.

  13. Jeff Hebert says:

    I thought at some point they ret-conned out the statue thing and made her a regular person, but again, I’m pretty out of date on the Wonder Woman mythos.

  14. Kalkin says:

    Well, even if we put aside the biological nature of Wonder Woman, she’d still be pretty alien culturally. That whole matriarchal culture of near immortal women is rather alien to regular human cultures – regardless of humanlike anatomy.

  15. I originally voted Superman for my sheer disgust with “Superman Returns”. Be bad, throw punch, give me a reason to watch this talkie! I’m missing re-runs of the Farm Report circa 1978 for this?!? Wolverine and Batman have tipping points. Both are already amoral to begin with (but still the good guys).

    Spidey, for all his real-world geek turned superhero with girlfriend interruptions, would not join the Dark Side. It’s not that he comes across as naive and humble. He’s just real and anyone can relate. With that kind of power, be the charming rogue instead of a filthy cur.

    Thor could never be a villain. As the Vikings were rather absolute, unlike the Greeks. In the Norse tradition, there is good and evil, and rather balanced, culminating in Ragnarok.

    A lot of good points have been made about Wonder Woman. Olympians abused their power rather selfishly. I change my vote to Wonder Woman. C’mon… Linda Carter has devilishly beautiful blue eyes.

  16. haz says:

    Wonder Woman all the way. I’m not up on most of (make that all of) the comics, but the best villains are ambiguous villains, the kind that are bad but also kind of good (because in real life, almost everybody thinks he’s the good guy). And Wonder Woman would be an ambiguous villain. She’d disrupt social order (bad), but do it in the name of women’s rights (good). Also, I readily admit, it’d be hot.