Who doesn't love a good group scene? I know I do! Thus your challenge for this week's caption contest is from the pages of Image Comics' "Brigade", issue 2:
Come up with the funniest/best replacement dialog for the balloon and you'll receive a free black and white illustration of whatever you like from yours truly, so put on that thinking cap and get busy! Keep it to no more than three total entries per person, left in the comments to this post, and relatively clean and you’re home free.
Good luck everyone!
(P.S. I can't post this image without pointing out that the artist is Marat Mychaels, who can only be described as a Liefeld Wannabe. In other words, he is an even worse illustrator than Rob, and yet someday aspires to be just like him. You can certainly see that wordless longing in the way the figures all seem to have their feet (off-panel, naturally) at different levels. Seriously, they'd all have to be standing on different stages for this to make sense. And the giant in the background either has his feet crammed into his buttocks or he's standing in a well. Which of the two foreground figures, and which of the two flying figures, is in front of the other? Can you tell? I can't. Add in the horrible coloring, the amateurish inking, and the awful character design, and you have the only thing worse than a pure Rob Liefeld drawing -- someone who wishes they were Rob Liefeld but isn't as talented as he is! Oy.)
“Here’s that Mychaels fella! Get him!”
1. “THERE HE IS! There’s the costume-bashing guy with the blog!!!
1) The Rob Liefeld special belt of many pouches on sale for 80% off?!? and there are only 2 Left?!? I MUST HAVE IT!!
1) “Call the fashion police! We got Liefeld-101 in progress!”
2) “Can YOU count the copy-cat ideas in this panel?”
3) “Remember boys, pouches out, grimace a lot and don’t show your feet no matter what!”
1. Go Go Power Rangers! (C- Ive ALWAYS wanted to say that)
2. We are UNION, we are MANY!
3. All your base are belong to us!
(I was gonna throw in an ‘ IT’S ‘ from Monty Python, but didnt think anyone woulda gotten it)
Go on, pull my finger
“Avengers ripoff? How dare you! Get ’em Eagleye!”
1) Aim for the crotch!
2) I told you kids to get off my lawn!
3) We’re from “Queer Eye: Superhero Edition” and we’re here to make you look FABULOUS!
[As an aside, why does it look like the bow-and-arrow guy is going to hit the white-haired guy in the back?]
1. KAAAAAAAAN
2. Hurry! The NAMBLA meeting is starting!!!!!!
3. CANDY!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. i had to throw in the kaan coment ‘cuz of the Almost-Will-Shatner-look on BattleStone’s face
void out my CANDY comment i have a new one
3.CANDY!!!!!!!!!!!——VOID
3. CHAAARGE—AAAA—-ooooh Archer your butt feels NICE have you been working out?
Finally! This is our chance to stop the non-stop evil drumming of the Energizer Bunny!
1) It’s Rob Liefeld! There’s only one attack that can defeat him. On three–one, two, three–GOOD ART!
“They have insulted the likes of Captain Shinycrotch!”
“That man ordered a suit off Hero-Gear.net!”
“Go my team of unmistakeable ripoffs!”
2) AVENGERS ASSMe…, er i mean … BRIGADE ATTACK!!!
“Now hold it right there. Sure, we’re wearing bad costumes, and Kearney here doesn’t have any string for his bow, but we have a lot of spunk. Grrr.”
“That guy right there, HE took my lollipop!”
“TO HOT TOPIC!”
“FLASHVISION, hit ’em with your ‘disintegration gaze’. GIANT BEHEMOTH, mush them like a pancake, HOT HARPEE, flambe them till Goldilocks says it’s too hot. And I’ll hit ’em with the good ol’ cowpunch.”
“You’ve managed to stop us in our tracks. But, we have two fliers, and they don’t leave any tracks.”
1. “Punch buggy red!”
2. “We are the NEW members of the lollipop guild.”
To the gay bar!
1. League of Lame-Ass Wannabes assemble!
2. You try wearing these big, heavy shoulder pads!
3. Don’t make me punch this archer again!
My God!!! I think i left the iron on!!!
Dang! These armor plates on my buttocks sure do chafe!
1. MUFFINS!!
2. Oh yeah? I’m so tough I’m going to let my buddy shoot me in the face with an arrow!
3. Red Rover, Red Rover, send Bedrock right over!
We shouldn’t have eaten the chili! Quick to the bathroom!
1) Come on, team! Show them we can grimace better than those goobers a couple of weeks back!
Sanjaya Rules!
1….2….3 POSE, pose? shouldn’t we fight? No the Avengers can do that.
Look at my (drum roll) AMAZING METAL CROTCH!!!!!
1. You think our costumes are bad? Wait till you hear our Theme Song!
Look! A better Artist! bring him to me!
2. Super Team Rip-off! GO!
3. POINT AND GASP!!!
THEY’RE OVER THERE…oh, hang on I’m not sure, this damn perspective
Why are we running this way, we should be going over there?
2 For the last time, WE ARE NOT THE YOUNGBLOOD!!!!
3. This is it guys. this is MORTAL KOMBAT!!!!!
2) Attack the funhouse mirror! Or, um, the Marvel crew! Which is it?
1. The arrow goes THAT WAY. And next time bring like 2 or 3.
2. Disco Balls, ACTIVATE!
3. BLEEAAHH! You’ll pay for that one, Captain Elevator Farts!
“Back to base, team! Otherwise, I’ll miss Queer Eye for the Straight Guy!”
There it is!!!!!! 50% of superhero costumes!!!!!!!
To the neighbors!
1. “You drew us, so now you’re going to have to EAT US”
2. “I can totally see your house from here!”
3. “What do you mean, you sharpened my shoulderpaghch..hhhkkk”
1. “ok team, show them yer GRRRR faces”
2. ” Autobots! Rollll….whait a minuet wrong comic book.”
2. ” Dont make me get heroic.”
1: Find your own bad pose Archer!
2: League of Austentatious Heros assemble!
3: Brace for it, the Megalith Neandrathal just farted!
1. Wait for it…Wait for it… NOW, fire your bow that does not have a string.
2. Over there, that’s the boy who took my lunch money.
3. You guys better not crap on my head when you fly by me.
1) “We need a new look,” you said. “We’re going glam,” you said. “We’ll love it,” you said. SHEESH!
2) Last time I let you pick the costumes, Blue-Haired Boy!
Over there! It’s Heromachine 3.0! Hurry, we’ve got to play it!
1. Those guys have fett! GET THEM!
*feet
(I’m going ot have to come back to this one – the image is just so daft that I don’t know what more needs to be said!)
That’s Miley Cyrus! Quick, get her before she transforms!
No one messes with BRIGADE! … No, not A brigade, just brigade, singular … No it’s not meant to be grammatically corect, it’s COOL, okay? Yes, I know there’s only 7 of us, but marketing says each one of us is worth a thousand soldiers, so technically we’re bigger than a real brigade. Yes, okay, except in Austria, their brigades are bigger…
*oops – few typos there as well. Please correct them if that entry gets posted anywhere.
1) Now bend to the left, very good. Back row jump, very good. 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2) Goddamn it, man, why would you bring arrows and a bow with no string?
3) Gargantuo sad. They cut Gargantuo’s head out of picture again…
This isn’t interesting enough to make a joke out of, but they look like the opposite of the Planeteers. You know, like the opposite of the pro-environment natural forces. Like giant commercialism in the back row, technology with the metal crotch, war with the stringless bow, then in the top row you have the twin forces of forest fire and storms, while those two little people in conspicuously Earth coloured costumes kind of watch. Anyhow, I just thought that that was kind of cool.
“HEROES is on! To the Television Room!”
1.) “Okay, you all know what to do–pick one of the following and don’t stop doing it ’til you see the ‘To Be Continued’ box: blow, suck, bite, stink, squat, grimace, and hunch!”
2.) “Look alive, people! We’re about to engage an enemy the likes of which we’ve never seen before: well-proportioned, sensibly outfitted, and nearly-realistic in pose; don’t let their alien appearance and slavish adherence to logic and the laws of physics throw you for a loop!”
3.) “Did someone call for a group of wavy-haired, teeth-gnashing cretins in atrocious costumes that nobody’s ever heard of? No? Well, then… can you tell us which way is the food court?”