[Herr D]

Good luck with the laptop thing. I’ve been cautioned from various sources concerning customer service for Dell and Acer products and Acer hardware. Specifics did not agree everytime.

On another note, as a former advocate for mental health, I should mention that schizophrenia is almost never associated with Multiple Personality Disorder anymore, that they are treated as very separate conditions now. MPD is believed to be induced completely by trauma, child abuse, etc., where schizophrenia and related illnesses have a genetic component and, once triggered, usually don’t result in behaving like or believing in separate internal personalities. Dissociation is still a part of schizophrenia as a category, and that, among other things will continue to confuse the general public about advances in the field. Terminology is one of the biggest problems–and every field needs better writers. If every field HAD clearer writers, that would be something, huh?

[Herr D]

Wow. Deadline has passed with no entries.
Module 1: Enforcer– will remain open. There is a potential prize waiting for the right entry. Submit entry here, but please direct all questions about M1: E to me via PM.

Module 2: PUNishment. Starting–NOW–you may submit, standard deadline, a horrible visual pun. Make me groan, make me moan.

[Herr D]

Two very nice pics, guys.
1. They both qualify and show effort / skill.
2. Both are emotive. I want to know what the femme is crying about and where I can get a look at the rest of her. I want to know what the stone carver was practicing for and where he went.
3. Faults. Keric’s does seem too two-dimensional. Brego’s crumbs / detritus is missing.

Maybe it’s the Stonehenge in the background, but the absence of stone flakes is less obvious. Brego wins.
Pick your three, man! You’re the next judge on OPMC!

[Herr D]

Mask Prize request update: I couldn’t find any MI clips that my web browser could both accept and pause, so I found these. Ideally the bunching would be mostly on the neck but might range up onto the lower face. (red on stick figure.) The woman to the right has her hands too high, and the bunching itself would be somewhere between that shown with the left woman’s face and the sock.

http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/peelsamples.jpg

I know this isn’t what you asked for, so if you can’t do it, I’ll choose something else.

[Herr D]

Yah. I didn’t run. I stayed right by my laptop. But if he’d been moving–

[Herr D]

The DEA didn’t want Naylem Sune freelancing, so they sent her to some ‘entertainment spots’ frequented and owned by cartel members. Very few innocent people died after her first week. They’re going to insist on more training.
http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/2013hm/HerrD-NaylemSuneDodging.jpg
Not to worry, she wasn’t a mercenary before, just might have put down a few undercovers that were too convincing when she meant to get bad guys. Hazardous work, right? Generally speaking, I’m probably going to leave, even if I love the floor show, if I see HER come in . . .

[Herr D]

Thank you, DCL.
Okay: [knuckle crack, stretch–]

ZEPHYR

Chapter 1: Bad Morning

Raggedy breathing, wheezing, and ugly rattling sounds deafeningly loud in my ears–buhBUMPbuhBUMPbuhBUMPbuhBUMPbuhBUMPbuhBUMPbuhBUMPbuhBUMP
–hollow hammering? Ugly gray smoke like car exhaust covering–writhing matted spikes? wind in underbrush?
–WHAT IS THAT SMELL?–

AAAUGH! Oh, thank the Lord. Just another bad dream. Jennifer sat up abruptly, peeling sweat-soaked nightie away from her puckered skin. MORE LAUNDRY. GREAT! She picked up her wrist canes and went to the bathroom. Dear Lord, is that the time? Why didn’t my alarm wake me? Without time for a shower, she wet a washrag, sponged herself off, sprayed cologne, dressed, bagged yesterday’s sandwich, hung bag and purse from her left hand right on her wrist cane handle, and keyed out from her apartment in less time than it took to get down the hallway past– Brandon’s stupid MUTT! *&#*@#! Laying in the hall sprawled out like that, it’s lucky I’m not mean as Mr. Po used to be. The elevator chimed and opened for her as she arrived, revealing– Oh, great, Mr. Han “Hi, Mr. Han, I’m glad you got the elev–“
“Miss Duke. I have news.” He waited for her to step in, pushed the button. Pompous jerk. “I’ve rented all three downstairs apartments.”
Ex-squeeze-me? “Really?”
“I could stall one of the new tenants and swap you,” he smiled pointedly, “but I’d have to charge you the new, higher rent and move you quickly. If you want it I’ll need a decision by tomorrow at noon.”
You KNOW I can’t be here at noon, you jerk. And mid-work-week? I’m not falling for THAT. Jennifer smiled sweetly. “I’m staying put.” HAH! I saw that! I messed you up, didn’t I? “Thank you SO-OO much for keeping me in mind, but this new program is working–” In my dreams, turning them to nightmares.
“They’re doctors. Very stable income–” he began rapidly, then more smoothly, “They’ll stay a long time. You know I worry–“
Yeah, right. “That’s very sweet, Mr. Han, but don’t worry. Gotta go. The bus won’t wait.” Jennifer left him listening to the click of her wrist canes. If you WORRIED about me, you’d make Brandon keep his dog out of that narrow hallway so I couldn’t fall over him and wouldn’t have to turn sideways. If you WORRIED about me, you’d make sure the elevators don’t BOTH need maintenance AT THE SAME TIME. Jerk. You’re not getting a key or more rent out of ME. That should burn you good! Despite record-breaking speed leaving for work, Jennifer only had time to eat three bites before the bus arrived, leaving her stomach growling in front of the bus driver that would make her get off for eating. Putting on makeup during the potholes on Washington Avenue didn’t go well, but at least there were no injuries. Not even when that ancient-looking homeless guy startled her by bending close to her suddenly and blurting out, “Very good!” She downed the last of her sandwich at the bus stop and caned as quickly as she could past the Backington Building. No early-morning vendors were in the courtyard. Just that stupid fountain. No lunch AGAIN? *&^%$#@! I’m not putting up with this today. She caned past the Crowe building to the deli, ordered a footlong coldcut extra veggies no mayo, and caned back to the Crowe building and up the two flights of steps arriving less than five minutes late.
Another record–to the deli and back in ten minutes with no leg twitches. What gives?
“Huh!” said David Crowe, checking his watch.
Jerk! “Yes, David?”
“Late again? You shouldn’t bet your talents are so valuable. Betting your job is a bad idea.”
“I’m not done betting yet. I bet that no one would be so petty as to fire someone who has my talents, does the editing and production work of three people, and not only takes home the pay of one part-time non-salaried and poorly waged employee, but also never complains about the completely illegal lack of handicapped access to the authorities. All over being late less often than you or the other anchors. If you wanted me on time, you’d invest in elevator access on THIS side of the building” –you useless, self-important, stupid, overblown, oh-I’m-the-boss’-nephew-but-that’s-not-why, sleazy S-O-B! This place only runs smoothly when you’re ON VACATION!! It’s such a shame. You look as good as a perfectly-basted store-window marketing-poster Christmas turkey stuffed with gravel, lead shot, and arsenic-soaked croutons.
Nathan looked up from shuffling papers on his desk. Grabbed his coffee cup. Got up and power-walked out. Made better time than when your lunch caught fire in the microwave. Man up, Nate. This doesn’t even concern you. David’s face twisted in that way that normally made Jennifer bite back a smile. But right then all she wanted to do was smash it in with her wrist canes. He stomped past the equipment bays and sets, then into his uncle’s office, and she achieved ten minutes of peace to start up her day.
All in all it was a quiet morning after that, Nathan only sent out one team, and HE was the one listening to the Bearcat scanner.

[Herr D]

Last, and DEFINITELY LEAST, because I find her the least lovely, there’s Metalhead.
It all started as a piercing fetish and near-terminal boredom with her job as a bookkeeper. No one who kept any records of the interim has been allowed to live. She is now a highly-paid mercenary distinguished by the following: She does take jobs to severely injure for triple the cost of a hit. She never hides her face. She occasionally can be paid to put poison on her boot spikes. She ALWAYS uses peroxide as her shampoo. And conditions with WD-40.

http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-MetalheadVaultsForAHug.jpg

A cameraman, now deceased, got this shot of her before dying as she vaulted toward him for a hug. Her spiked Kevlar did ruin the camera, but he was streaming before she made it to him. This is the only good shot the techs were able to get from their downloads.

This is a rendering by one of the few witnesses willing and able to ID her.
http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-Metalhead_zpsaf174caa.png
Considered haired and dangerous.

*Thanks to Hammerknight for prompting this bold noob to dog some tricks. I had not known about screen captures until you mentioned them. Ask.com had a nice tutorial.

[Herr D]

Yikes. I suggested A, and B. This leapt out at me. Option C. With a subtle additional twist.
http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/2013hm/HerrD-redesignForKeric-1.jpg
–Because a second punchline is always good. Hopefully it’s not too subtle.

[Herr D]

This Evil Lovely was my entry in the Manga Mage contest.

http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-KronaTheMage.png

Krona walked out of Stonehenge one day without anyone seeing her go in. She wouldn’t say what she was up to or how she got her scar . . . I’m a little worried . . .

[Herr D]

And this is my entry for dblade’s Evil M Henchwoman:

http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-EvilMHenchwoman.png

Two-stick fighting is hard enough of a style–then make both of them billy clubs. That’s some skill.
And now, my entry for dblade’s Madame Malevolent. That Fury idea, interesting, especially since some myths have them change roles. I’m afraid my mask turned out less-than-fascinating.

http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-MadameMalevolent-1.jpg

Bound to be pretty enough under THAT though . . . the dress was less than I planned as well. Somehow the shred effect was easier to do in person. (?) I haven’t made many garments, and I’m a lousy enough tailor that I always require quite a few fittings.

[Herr D]

Thank you, Vampyrist. I wasn’t sure whether to use the flash or not–
These next few blocks are dedicated to Evil Lovelies. The first several were made for dblade’s contest–I am alarmed to realize I posted Gigantica TWICE already. Then again, she’s supposed to take up twice as much room, right?
[crickets]
Tough room. Oh, well. This first one is actually a mistake that turned out pretty well.
http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-WoreKevlarMeetingMsManga.jpg
Based on the character description, THIS was closer to her description of Ms. Manga.
http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/hm3/HerrD-MissMangaDrewSnakes.jpg
Even an avid reader like me misses an important detail here and there. “Always–no–never forget to check your references.”
Anyone know that source?

[Herr D]

If moon guy sneezed really hard, would he become black hole guy? I’d like to see him.

[Herr D]

You’ve captured a look I was looking for. Too many times I’ve tried for a blue lovely and wound up with an asphyxiated-looking thing. Now at least I can come here and look at it . . .

[Herr D]

On a visit to G979, I got this still of a Sleeping Flyer. Wonderfully mysterious creatures. If you’re less than seven inches thick and under 110 pounds, the tourist board will still let you climb inside for a flight as of last season. You climb up through the rope-ladder-like tail right into the carapace. Most passengers agree to take video in exchange for ration cubes and breath apparatus. Barring accidents and poaching, none of these amazing creatures have died (or bred, fed, or even awakened) for the 3000-plus years since they were discovered. They just breathe, take off, and land in a three-hour cycle. (There are some reported to snore.)

http://i1067.photobucket.com/albums/u438/jamais5/2013hm/HerrD-SleepingFlyerOnG979-1.jpg

Universal Biologic did a fascinating story on G979. Mostly it was about the lost civilization known only as “The Watchers.” Not all of their texts have been translated, but they may be unique among known civilizations for the following: Their ENTIRE language appears to transliterate phonetically from nature sounds, ingeniously deduced by the first archaeologist team. They correctly predicted a nucleonic storm that would poison their atmosphere by an anionization process activating their natural mix of sulfur, arsenic, cyanide, neon, and fluorine–WITHOUT radiotelescopes, artificial satellites, space travel, spectrometers, or even radar. (No one knows how–the texts describe standing miles apart and comparing sounds of it arriving by ear, which is absurd.) Most unique of all, their entire civilization went calmly about their business for over a hundred years after the prediction was verified by several citizens, referencing that they would already be “gone.”
But, where?
Soundings have been taken and core samples verified. They didn’t tunnel downward. No digging besides their horticultural efforts was ever done. Sonar verifies that there are no artificial structures below the water. Their technology did not include space travel, in fact, it was limited to agriculture, horticulture, animal husbandry (including ornamental avian,) archives, and sound recording. So approximately 400,000 of them vanished without a trace. The last words written were: Now we start away, reconciled. We go Crowuhtain [sic.] No one knows what that last word means.
Anyway, the rest of the episode had a rather sarcastic tone. When they disappeared over 5000 years ago, they didn’t leave detailed records of their anatomy, medicine, or general appearance. So, in theory, they could’ve been picked up by some other group. UB actually theorized that “The Watchers” were color-blind, because they never even mention the Sleeping Flyers, which have more beautiful plumage than any other species on the planet.
The Sleeping Flyers roost until dawn or twilight when breezes max out, their reflexes release their hold on the roost, they fly for almost precisely three hours ‘easterly’ toward Ygu, their red dwarf sun, and then roost for about seven minutes. They repeat this cycle until their crystalline eyes either cannot detect light, or detect more than half the sun’s strength. They appear to be neurologically recording and osmotically receiving calcium through their roosting limbs, but their digestive systems are in some sort of dry stasis, allowing passengers. The wings are partly reflective, partly translucent, and completely beautiful. No other limbs and only what appear to be reproductive organs, also in stasis. The brains are actually inside the wings, lightweight and plentiful. The species exists over the whole planet. No one has bothered with a close count, but it would appear they number over a quarter of a million.

[Author]

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