Chippendale's or Go For Blow?

In our last installment, we were standing befuddled in our apartment in the high-tech alien embrace of our new super suit deciding whether to potentially blow our nosy neighbor to smithereens or beat a hasty retreat. You’ll never guess, but we decided to run!

I love that our alien super suit doesn’t have a built in wifi decoder ring. They should follow the example of Jeff Goldblum from “Independence Day” and just get an Apple computer, since apparently the Mac OS has a universal translator and can hack anything anywhere, even if it’s from an alien tech base.

I think Dale’s one of our reporter friends, isn’t he? Maybe he’ll be Lois Lane to our Clark. Or maybe he’ll be the Kim Basinger to our Michael Keaton and expose our secret identity! On the other other hand, it’s possible he followed one of the other heroes and got bitten by a radioactive chipmunk and is now the living embodiment of Disney’s Chip (of Chip ‘N’ Dale, before they sold out and started a male stripper business).

By the way, now’s a good time to announce that Disney will be doing a live-action version of Chip ‘N’ Dale’s “Rescue Rangers” next year.

Admit it, you can’t tell whether that’s a joke or not. This is how low Hollywood’s creativity has ebbed, thank you very much “Battleship”.

So what’ll it be, kids?

(All text is ©2012 by Matt Youngmark and Chooseomatic Books from the excellent “Thrusts of Justice”, which you should totally go buy your own copy of since we’re only scratching the surface of the hilarity enshrined in these pages).

10 Responses to Chippendale's or Go For Blow?

  1. I’m thinking that Dale went after Nightwatchman, and was given his identity the way we beacme the new Cosmic Guardian. Super Hero Team Up!!!

  2. At the very least, we should have a better shot at convincing a friend not to blow our secret identity. But, yeah, I suspect Dale’s also had an origin, and we’ve got a lot to talk about. I dunno if the bar is the best place to do that, considering we apparently still don’t know how to take off the suit, but it’s not like there’s anywhere else you could meet, right?

  3. Yeah, I think meeting with Dale is the best plan of action. I’m not convinced Dale knows that we’re Cosmic Guardian, and rather ended up with super powers of his own. But whichever way it goes, if we don’t go, it might make him suspicious.

  4. Yeah, I suspect Dale’s a ‘super’ as well.

    I guess that there will probably be some Alvin and the Chipmunk’s references in the Rescue Ranger moive. So, why is one of those rodents nameed Chip, but the other one isn’t named Munk?

  5. A roofer I know told me that pretty much all skyscrapers have motion detectors on their roofs to prevent burglars in helicopters from breaking in, so this comic book business of “lurking about the rooftops” is passe’ in the extreme. i imagine Batman gets around it because Wayne Enterprises installed all the detectors, but Spider-Man must drive the Security Guards crazy!

  6. At least Spider-man breaks the monotony. Think about the pigeons.

    Now, to the bar. We could certainly use a drink, and I feel a team up coming on.

  7. My choice was to go to the bar. Then again, my choice is pretty much ALWAYS “go to the bar.”

  8. Go to the bar. If all else fails, we can get drunk and blow the city to kingdom come. ;)

  9. spidercow2012

    Since the alternative seems so uninteresting (tho that’s really nothing to go on) I went with the crowd heading to the bar.
    Speaking of Disney, I keep waiting for Teacup Ride:The Movie

  10. ProwlerKnight

    I say meet up, based on previous arguments

    spidercow2012: Speaking of Disney, I keep waiting for Teacup Ride:The Movie

    They still gotta do Small World: The Movie first