Caption Contest 113: Aerial Super-Dickery

Your challenge this week is to come up with the best replacement dialog for this comics panel:

The best entry (as judged by yours truly) wins the author's choice of either any item they like or any portrait to be included in HeroMachine 3′s final release, or a custom black and white “Sketch of the Day” style illustration (you pick the subject, I draw it however I like).

All entries must be left as a comment (or comments) to this post. Keep ‘em clean (appropriate for a late-night broadcast TV show), but most importantly, keep ‘em funny!

This week we have a cap of no more than five (5) entries per person, so make 'em your best!

95 Responses to Caption Contest 113: Aerial Super-Dickery

  1. Avatar dblade says:

    1. “Superman, you diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick!”

    (sorry, couldn’t help myself)

  2. Avatar Ian says:

    Uh, doesn’t webbing usually come from SPIDERman?

    “No Ticket?”

    No! I’m not Wolverine, I can’t fastball special!

    I can see my house from here!

    Doesn’t Bizzarro have the backwards “S”?

  3. Avatar dblade says:

    @Ian (2): Dang! I was thinking webbing and Wolverine too. Victory goes to the quickest trigger…

  4. Avatar SpeedyJester says:

    Hookers!, here I come.

  5. Avatar Mr.MikeK says:

    I’m sorry I gave you a mullet in the 90’s!

    Mutton Chop Powers Activate! Activate Dammit!

  6. Avatar Vampyrist says:

    1) You’re right, Tim Tebow is the best.


    3) Flying isn’t all that it’s cracked up to beeeeeeeeeeeeee!

  7. Avatar skybandito says:

    1) Wait! The PARACHUTE!
    2) Okay, I’ll turn the game off!
    3) Thanks! My hiccups are gone!
    4) Hey, Supes, grab my hat, willya?
    5) Geez! You’d think I was Kevin Smith!

  8. Avatar Nick Hentschel says:

    “Well, that’s the end of THESE undies!”

    “Oh, no: not DETROIT!!!”

    “This wasn’t the bailout we wanted!!!!”

  9. Avatar Syntax says:

    1. This isn’t my stop!
    2. This is the last time I fly AirSuperman!
    3. All I asked foor were some free peanuts!
    4. Where are my legs!
    5. No! Don’t send me to New Mutants, Rob Liefeld draws that!

  10. Avatar EnderX says:

    “No! Not the hat!”

  11. Avatar NGpm says:

    1. Wait! Other people were using their phones too!

  12. Avatar Mr. Q says:


    Mr. Q

  13. Avatar count libido says:

    I SAID I was Hat Man not Batman!

  14. Avatar Frankie says:

    “Wait! I paid for my ticket!”

  15. Avatar Frankie says:

    “I lied. I’m NOT indestructible!”

  16. Avatar Moi says:

    1) Up Specia.. WAIT U SAID DIS WAZ BRWL
    2) I Said Take All MY Money

  17. Avatar punkjay says:

    I swear I never touched Miss Lane!

  18. Avatar GreenBat says:

    I’ll never play Words with Friends again.

  19. Avatar Dr. Shrinker says:

    “No one told me it was a non-smoking flight!”

  20. Avatar Worf says:

    1) Wait! I haven’t told you the punchline yet!

  21. Avatar Worf says:

    2) Geronimooooooooo!

  22. Avatar Worf says:

    My name is Arthur BENT, not Dent!

  23. Avatar Nick Hentschel says:


  24. Avatar Wrinkles says:

    oh my god I’m in a Spiderman Comic book!

  25. Avatar gendonesia says:


  26. Avatar Whit says:

    1) “Save me, Spide–I mean, Superman!”

  27. Avatar Joel says:

    “Why did they have to cast superman in the remake of Air-force One?!”

  28. Avatar Joel says:

    “Wait! You got it wrong, you’re supposed to throw the MISSILE out of orbit and save ME!”

  29. Avatar thejay says:

    1. That counts as sexual harassment!
    2. Yeah, yeah! Throw the rocket scientist out of the rocket!
    3. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No! It’s a MOTHE-
    4. I keep telling you, I am not your kryptonian cousin!
    5. And all the girls say I’m pretty fly (for a white guy).

  30. Avatar Hammerknight says:

    “I swear didn’t know it was your friends Batplane.”
    “So this is how you play catch?”
    “I swear I didn’t fart.”
    “You said grab the joy stick.”
    “Last time I ask you how it feels to go faster than a speeding bullet.”

  31. Avatar Twiggyseed says:

    1. But it’s myyyy Plaaaaane!!!

    2. I never dated any “Lois Lane”!

    3. Watch out (Insert flying character here)!

    4. Okay! I’ll add the Superman symbol in heromachine!!

    5. Thanks for saving me from that demon jet!!

  32. Avatar DubbleYoo says:

    1. All right, the underwear-over-tights look doesn’t look stupid on you!
    2. I said I wanted to fly, not plummet to my death!
    3. So that’s why you never tug on Superman’s cape!
    4. Hey, you’re Clark Keeeeeeeeeeeeeee……..

  33. Avatar McKnight57 says:

    1) But I didn’t want to be the first contestant for SUPER-bungee jumping!!!!!!
    2) WAIT A MINUTE!!!! The fastball special is a Marvel thing!!!
    3) I knew i should have added a chinstrap to my flying hat!!!

  34. 1. Ok! We won’t show “Superman Returns” as the in-flight movie!

    2. Worst acid trip ever!

    3. You know, my heart will stop from sheer terror before you can swoop in to save me!

    4. I swear that I’m not on the BCS selection committee!

    5. Drat! Lost a contact!

  35. Avatar William A. Peterson says:

    “But I haven’t learned how to MISS the ground, yet!”

  36. Avatar gendonesia says:

    2nd “down down and awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyy”
    3rd “Love you Moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom”

  37. Avatar Jahshel says:

    1. I’m Rick Perry and I do not approve this messAHHHHH…

    (sorry. couldn’t resist)

  38. Avatar John says:

    *Not an entry*

    Why is the pilot of a fighter plane wearing a suit and fedora? And DC wonders why people don’t take them seriously.

  39. Avatar Abraxas says:

    1. I only wanted a hug!

  40. Avatar TOOL says:

    Who throws a man, honestly?

    This is my stop, you can let me off here.

    Wonder Woman invited me in her plane, I didn’t break in!

    Since when do you have spidermans web stickem powers?

    Wait, I didn’t mean that crack about no one liking you because of your invinciblity thing that gives you a superiority complex!

  41. Avatar Joel says:

    “So THIS is forth class.”

  42. Avatar Joel says:

    “So THIS is fourth class.”

  43. Avatar Joel says:

    sorry for double post, didn’t see the first one.

  44. Avatar maniacmick says:

    But I’m Billy Baldwin, Not Alec!!!

  45. Avatar Jessica says:

    1. I swear she said she was 21!
    2. But I don’t WANNA learn to fly by myself!
    3. I swear I never TOUCHED Lois!
    4. Oh my God! Is that Stan Lee?!
    5. Now, why’d you have to go and pull the webbing outta my ass?!

  46. Avatar kyle says:

    1)I promise i won’t star in the superman movie!
    2)when did since superman had webbed armpit hair!
    3)I think i saw something similar like this in marvel comics!
    4)Please don’t tell me this happens to me in the comic!
    5) Just because my name is peter pan it doesn’t mean i can fly!

  47. Avatar Jessica says:

    *Not an entry*

    Okay, so far my favorites are (besides my own of course):

    SpeedyJester: Hookers!, here I come.
    Skybandito: Wait! The PARACHUTE!
    Nick Hentschel: Well, that’s the end of THESE undies!
    Hammerknight: I swear I didn’t fart.
    William A. Peterson: But I haven’t learned how to MISS the ground, yet!

  48. Avatar Kwnnos says:

    1) you bully, that’s my rocket!
    2) i said, i’m not playing football!
    3) someone get me out of here!!!

  49. Avatar spidercow2010 says:

    Okay, Okay, I’ll return my seat back and tray table to the fully upright and locked position!

  50. Avatar alvacascus says:

    1. Hwaaa…!! Don’t teach me to fly without a parachute!!
    2. To infinity and beyo… Oh no! I’m not Buzz Lightyear!
    3. I wanna see my family, but not so fast like this!
    4. Don’t practice Angry Birds in real life!!
    5. I dunno if superman had webbing skill, but thanks for saving me!

  51. Avatar spidercow2010 says:

    THIS is the connecting flight?!

  52. Avatar spidercow2010 says:

    I was wrong! Underwear looks GOOD on the outside!!

  53. Avatar Debochira says:

    I only deleted one porno! The others are still theerrrrreeeeeee!………..

  54. Avatar spidercow2010 says:

    Oops. Sorry DubbleYoo, I missed yours.

  55. Avatar Dionne Jinn says:

    “Why this always happens to meeeee???”

  56. Avatar Bael says:

    1) Oh no, Not again.

  57. Avatar EXILE says:

    1. No! Not the atomic wedgie!!
    2. Curse you Harrison Ford!
    3. Idonwannadie!!!!!
    4. Screw youuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!

  58. Avatar Volt says:

    1- Flame on! Flame ooonnn!!!
    2- Ok! You’re more stronger than chuck norris!!
    3- Chuck Norris heeelp meee!

  59. Avatar Meficrow says:

    I cant see my house from here!!!

  60. Avatar Klokanko says:


  61. Avatar TheNate says:

    Killing me won’t undo Superman IV!

    Superman! When did you get Spiderman’s web powers?

    But I’m not THAT Dr. Hyde!

  62. Blue Blazer Blue Blazer says:

    1) I never learned to read!

  63. Avatar Lewis says:

    “This is not statistically the safest was to travel!”

  64. Avatar Frankie says:

    “This is going to be awesome. You are faster than a speeding bullet, right?”

  65. Avatar BenK22 says:

    1. “I just borrowed it. It’s not my MiG.”

    2. “You’re coming back right?”

    3. “Worst way to end a date, ever.”

    4. “Soooorryyy!”

    5. “Next time, I fly with Green Lantern.”

  66. Avatar Wierdrocks says:

    “All I wanted was directions!”

  67. Avatar Moi says:

    3) Dang! I knew I never should have said never

  68. Avatar Gabe Puratekuta says:

    “But I had nothing to do with Superman 64!”
    “Do I look like Jimmy Olson to you?”
    “Fine, it’s your plane now!”
    “I’m sorry for booting your head!”
    “I didn’t steal your pet dinosaur!”

  69. Avatar ggdd says:

    “”I Should never have Dumped you!””

  70. Avatar Justin Hulse says:

    I thought you were a good guy!?!?!?!?!

  71. Avatar 1rd2th3st says:

    1. Okay I’ll spit out my Stride gum!!!
    4. Oh so this is the “American Way” to fly!
    5. Oh, look a sperm whale and a bowl of petunias

  72. Avatar Ethan Shuster says:

    “Nooooo!!! My hat!”

  73. Avatar Bud says:

    I just wanted to play ‘Words with Friends’.

  74. Avatar spidercow2010 says:

    not an entry:
    For my money, so far the line to beat is Nick Hentschel’s “Oh, no not DETROIT!!!”

  75. Avatar Ian says:

    Not an Entry:

    As a Detroiter, I find it hilarious and offensive at the same time.

  76. Blue Blazer Blue Blazer says:

    2) Impacting the ground after falling upwards of 30,000 feet, my only weakness!

  77. Avatar Rankyn says:

    1.I feel I can fly..

  78. Avatar Nick Hentschel says:

    I keep forgetting to ask: is “super-dickery” in any way related to “hickory-dickory,” doc? 😉

  79. Avatar Dr. Shrinker says:

    “I was kidding! You don’t really look like Dean Cain!”

  80. Avatar Nick Hentschel says:

    Ian(75) and others:
    I used to live outside Detroit, myself, a long time ago (West Bloomfield), so you have my sympathies.
    I was inspired, more than anything else. but the Zucker Bros.’s continual use of the joke, particularly in “A Fistful of Yen.”

  81. Avatar Blazing Tornado says:

    “I still think Batman’s cooler than you!”

    “This isn’t what I expected when I said I wanted to avoid TSA checks when we land!”

    “I have no regrets about making fun of his red underoos!”

    “Remember me as I lived… a horrible costume designer named Jim Lee!”
    (Yeah, I’m still sour about the ugly New 52 redesigns.)

    “Wait, Superman, my hat fell off!”

  82. Avatar Myro says:

    1. “Okay, I promise not to tell anymore “that’s what she said” jokes.”
    2. “Fine! You’re scarier than Batman! YOU’RE SCARIER THAN BATMAN!”

  83. Avatar StarMan2000 says:


  84. Avatar StarMan2000 says:

    2. This isn’t what I meant by ‘showing me how to FLLLLYY’ AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

  85. Avatar StarMan2000 says:

    3. NOO!! My security deposit!!

  86. Avatar Niall Mor says:

    These TSA pat-downs are getting way out of hand!

  87. Avatar skybandit says:

    Not an entry, just an observation:

    Either that aircraft is too small to put people in or Supe’s been hitting the Red Kryptonite again.

  88. Avatar Joel says:

    “So this is what sleep with the birds means.”

  89. Avatar Joel says:

    “The adult in me likes to fly, but the kid in me just threw the adult in me out of me.”

  90. Avatar Joe says:

    “It’s okay! This happens to lots of guys!”

  91. Avatar jamesinchains says:

    These aren’t skydiving lessons! They’re lies!!!!

  92. Avatar Sutter_Kaine says:

    1) “All I said was this is a meal fit for Jehovah!”

  93. Avatar Whit says:

    2) Help, I’m falling through the Amalgam Universe! Save me, Super-Spider!

  94. Avatar Keith_Kanin says:

    1) I keep telling you, I am NOT Alec Baldwin!
    2) SHIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiii…………….!

  95. Avatar Myro says:

    3. “Can you read my mind? Do you know what…NOOOOOOOO!!!”