Post post-Apocalypse post, retcon edition

OK, so we died. Big deal. Characters in comics die all the time and it’s not a major setback — wait a few issues, let sales dip a bit, then you’re alive once again and back in business.

You all voted to basically imagine that we made a deal with Mephistopholes, Spider-Man style, to go back in time and avoid Denton completely, carrying on as if we paid attention to the smoke we saw in our binoculars. Therefore, we spring back to life, Phoenix-like (the bird, not the city)!

I do not believe Uncle Jonas (surely one of the Jonas Brothers, after the teen-hearthrob phenom met the bad side of a nuclear exchange) is using “tumped” in the same way I would. But, I’m skeevy. Regardless, we chug some liquid courage and carry on:

I get an 8 on my random pick — where were those high numbers during our retconned-out knife fight?! — which results in:

The gamer in me has visions of University grounds littered with high-tech weapons, health power-ups, ultra-cool gadgets, and other stuff meant to increase our general level of bad-assery.

The former college student in me has visions of University grounds littered with beer cans, drunken college-age people, lawn parties, and kegs.

The cynical blogger in me has visions of a page reading “You step inside the dorm and it collapses and kills you thanxforplayingbye.”

The grammar police in me wants to tell the author that in Texas, it’s called “Interstate 35″, not “Highway 35″.

The porker in me wants to know where the hell the ice cream I was promised went to.

What does your little inner voice tell YOU we should do?

About Jeff Hebert

Jeff is a 45 year old city boy who has somehow found himself located in Colorado, fulfilling his lifetime dream of making a living drawing super-heroes all day.

15 Responses to Post post-Apocalypse post, retcon edition

  1. Tumped? Tyres? This is truly…THE FUTURE!

    Makes me feel like a frakking gimboid, y’know?

    And if we’re trying to go west, why are we getting on an odd-numbered Interstate? They go north and south.

  2. Clearly Freeway 35 is a different road entirely than Interstate 35–it’s concrete, after all, not asphalt, and when’s the last time you saw a concrete Interstate?

    I can’t imagine a single thing at the University that we’ll need or even want. We were so overburdened that we left extra supplies in the ranch we burned down, so picking up some light reading is probably out of the question.

    But I still voted to search it, because my inner voice has been playing Fable III, and you miss all the good stuff if you just stick to the glowy path.

  3. I say search the university. Something interesting might happen or we might find something useful. Or we could get ambushed in there and die. Again.

  4. Although our last side trip ended badly, I’m inclined to agree with X-stacy. At least this time it doesn’t look like we’d be going alone, unless the Convoy is just planning to abandon us.

  5. I’m going to go with the University too. My thought is if we get ambushed and die again, then clearly this adventure was never meant to be. If we don’t, maybe we can get something cool out of the expedition.

    Also, I want to know where the ice cream was. Oh, wait, that’s right, I got such a craving for ice cream last week, I just went out and bought some Chunky Monkey. It’s in the freezer.

  6. I vote we explore. The last place you’re going to find a Psycho Biker Gang is in a University reading room, apocalypse or no.

  7. Explore the campus. Supplies plus some decent info from the school library

  8. I say we keep going. I think all we are going to find are refugees, wierdos and mutants holed up in the University. They’ll probably want to shoot us and/or eat our brains. This is the post-Apocolyptic future after all. It’s not like the culinary arts classes will be running so that we could get cake with our non-icecream.

  9. Considering our dubious stats, and our history with investigating suspicious locations, I’d suggest avoiding any possible encounters that aren’t mecessary. Avoid the university, go straight to the highway.

  10. Let’s search the campus. Maybe we’ll find some more “endurance” laying around…

  11. Or ammo. It is Texas, after all, and furthermore, Texas seen through the eyes of a Brit. The magazine room in the library might be worth checking out….

  12. I was so pleased for a second there on pg 198; I thought this was going to turn into a drinking game:
    “Spot smoke or dust on horizon–Take a drink”
    “Long description of post-apocalyptic rubble–drink or lose 3 Endurance points”
    “Misplaced British spelling–Chug”
    Which brought back my University days for me…so I voted to keep moving.

  13. Hunter-Hunted

    I say, why not just go check out that University. I mean, if we do bad and die (again) we can always just go back to the last time we were alive and pick something else (again).

    If I had known that with low stats came respawns I wouldn’t have worried the first time around. So, let’s go gung ho guns blazing every time from now on!! We are unstoppable – we are ‘Respawn-Man’!