Dollah dollah billz, y’all!

Like a giddy country girl shopping in the big city for the first time, our little Lone Wolf cub dithered long and hard at the checkout counter over which two items to add to his inventory as his reward for nabbing a would-be thief. The backpack was a no-brainer, since without it we can’t carry anything else, but the second item was a matter of fierce internal debate. Rope or food, food or rope? I bet at the last minute it occurred to Kai that perhaps the rope was hemp, and if he got too hungry he could smoke it, thus causing him to stop caring.

Regardless, we bundle up our thirty feet of coiled heaven into our spiffy new backpack and head out.

More shopping, woot! If we can get our older, slutty friend, our cute red-headed lesbian friend, and our delicate-boned socialite friend to come with us, we’ll practically have “Sex and the City, Lone Wolf Style” going on! Given the joy our last expedition into the world of small-town window shopping brought us, I’m going to make an executive decision and steer us into Mr. Majenor’s fine establishment.

Once again I’m going to make an executive decision and sell off our useless dagger and mace. We don’t know how to use either one, so while they’re better than going hand-to-hand, they’re not super useful. That nets us 4 gold. Since a spear is only 5, I’m going to pull rank again and buy one. Ha! I’ve already got the beard, so if I could grow a prow-like head of hair and learn how to walk while leaning forward, I could practically be Will Ryker with all this executive-making.

That leaves us with one spear and seven Gold Crowns. We now have a backpack, and our Seal has been returned. So I’d say we’re doing pretty darn well! We have no Meals, so if we don’t get out of town to hunt something soon, we’re going to have a rumbly tummy. Yes, I said “tummy”, what of it?!

Having apparently completed our tour of the market district, we retire to the hayloft as instructed and:

It’s 200 miles to Port Bax, it’s been six days, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses. Hit it!

Also, ouch on the -3 END for missing our meal. I guess that hemp rope wasn’t tasty after all. We’re now down to 16 END from our max of 24.

As a goal-driven young cub, we head on in to check out ticket costs to Port Bax:

Yow! 20 Gold Crowns is a lot … we’ve only got 7, as I mentioned earlier, thanks to those bastard thieving fishermen. Jerks.

But, that’s all bygones. Let’s see what we can do about our penniless state:

It’s Vegas, baby! Now, I’m not usually much of a gambler in these kinds of games, but we don’t have much choice.

So here’s what I did. I took my Random Number Chart, closed my eyes, and pointed. The number I got was the number we bet on. I repeated that to get the number that showed up on the wheel. After my initial giddy enthusiasm in betting two Gold Crowns, I started betting only one at a time. And here’s what happened:

Wow, what a roller-coaster ride! If by “roller-coaster” you mean “closing your eyes and pointing at a piece of paper”. But, we were almost down and out, our adventure ended in a drunken pool of filth as we were tossed out as a degenerate gambler, and instead we have the money for our coach ride to glory!

Or do we?

I mean, sure, we have enough (barely) for our ticket, but that would leave us with just one Gold Crown. One! What if we get robbed again, or if we need to buy a Meal before we starve to death, or if there’s a really cool doohickey we have just got to have at some cute little roadside shop? We’ve been lucky so far, so should we continue this wild ride and keep gambling, or slink off like a boring, dutiful Kai Master and get into the coach?

About Jeff Hebert

Jeff is a 45 year old city boy who has somehow found himself located in Colorado, fulfilling his lifetime dream of making a living drawing super-heroes all day.

17 Responses to Dollah dollah billz, y’all!

  1. Quit gambling after you’ve reached your goal? Pfft. Keep those dice rolling.

  2. I’m normally not the gambling type, but what the heck? There’s a good chance that when we go outside, the dog will have ran away with our spear, or we’ll get robbed anyway, so we might as well take some risk. And is anyone else amazed that’s it’s only been six story days? That’s a lot of bad luck for six days.

  3. FYI Jeff, I voted for Let it Ride, but nothing happened.

  4. Love the fact that every single person (at the time of writing) wants to keep gambling. Hey, why break the pattern?

  5. Money=power, so using that logic, i say keep the money flowing. You never know if we run into a magic spear that costs money in the future…

  6. I’m going to be the (wussy) voice of reason here, but you know the saying, “quit while you’re ahead?” Yeah, I know, I scare off easily. But still, we had a great run, we got our money, let’s hop on that coach and get on with it.

    No? Well, okay, don’t blame me if we end up penniless at the end of this.

  7. May I also suggest, based on how the game is structured, to choose only numbers between 1 and 8. That way, we’re not wasting a possible payout opportunity when choosing 0 or 9.

  8. Me, Myself & I

    runt82 (7) its a moot point because the numbers roll over. If I undertand what is written above correctly 0 is next to both 1 and 9 so if you select a 9 and then a 0 shows up you still get a payout.

  9. According to the little note at the end, the 0 and the 9 are adjacent, runt82.

    Now, don’t any of you math whizzes laugh at me, but I’m going to try and figure the odds here.

    You have a total 30% chance on any turn of winning at least 5x your bet.
    You have a 10% chance on any turn of winning 8x your bet.
    So for every 10 times you play (on average), you’ll bet a total of 10 coins (assuming a bet of one per go). In those 10 times, you’ll have won 8 coins once, and 5 coins twice. Thus unless you hit a bad run, on average for every 10 goes, you should get a profit of 10 coins (spend 10, win 20).

    Does that sound right, people who majored in something more technical than English and art?

    If it is, maybe continuing to roll those bones isn’t the most reckless strategy after all … I suppose that’s why there are way more than ten numbers in roulette :-)

  10. Ok, since noone else has said it, I will.

    COCKCROW!! And a shrill one at that.

    May I make a suggestion for a future Poll Posistion? Who will win? Cockcrow vs. Seacock

  11. I know I’m going to get this wrong since it’s been a while since I’ve had to use probability. So if it’s wrong, please correct me…

    The probability of not winning anything is 0.7. The probability of winning 5 is 0.2. The probability of winning 8 is 0.1. So, if I’m doing this right, the expected value of a 1 coin bet is (0.7*0)+(0.2*5)+(0.1*8)=1.8. So, for a 1 coin bet, we’d be getting an 80% return in the long run. In other words, we would win money in the long run. Again, I could be wrong.

  12. @Jeff/runt82: I think runt is right on the percentages, which still leaves us on the winning side statistically speaking (not that THAT has ever stopped us from being dead in 5 seconds).

    @Myro: even though I voted to keep playing, your comment reminded me of the time I decided to play with a deck of many things in a D&D game… It netted me some great advantages… AND an outsider as an enemy. When the DM decided to spring him on me (2 years later) I was done for. To this day my poor character is rotting away in an otherworldly prison… :(

  13. That Sex and the City reference was Gold. And I can tell you, as a vixenous veteran of the tables which give me my HM handle, that only playing 9 in roulette is also gold. Bet low, over a long game, you’ll end up walking away happy. :D

    One little life lesson Reno can teach any girl.

  14. Hunter-Hunted

    frankie(10) – Although I love a good cockfight just as much as the next guy, I however thought of something else when I read about the livestock-alarmclock..

    Why are we going hungry when we now have a brand new spear and our super kai hunting discipline? I mean, if we are experts at hunting in the wild, catching a cockcrow in a barn doesn’t sound like a challenge. I mean it can’t run that far…

    Oh, and I’m all in – if you get what I mean.
    (We seems to find money shortly after we’ve been mugged or unlucky anyway. So if we lose all of it we can just go outside, kick a cat ((anything larger than that will kick us)) and find X gold crowns where it lands)

  15. @frankie (10) Truthfully, I was still laughing at “leather jerkin”. Sounds like the name of a fetish club.

  16. I am normally against gambling, but that’s crazy good odds. How the heck does the gambling house stay open, giving out all that money for free like that? I’d kind of prefer to keep going to say 30 or so, just to be safe, but given the two choices, let’s take those suckers’ money!