The ballerina dreams of Alchemoid

Life's tough when you're a seven foot muscle-bound reptiloid who enjoys codpieces and halter tops. Your evil overlords want you to go out and kick Captain America's ass, but all you want to do is .... dance!

To that end, it's important to always go out in your toe-free under-slung corduroy tights. Oh sure, the other ballerinas at the dance studio might titter and/or giggle, but those skinny skanks don't have crocodile skin that would tear Lycra, now do they?

Imagine how happy Alchemoid must be in the adventure depicted here. He's finally gotten Cap captured, and is free to unleash the awesome power of his Fouetté and the Patriotic Pummeler is absolutely mesmerized, jaw literally agape!

Note that while I may have made up the "fact" that Alchemoid is a reptile, it's incontrovertible* that he wants to be a ballerina. I mean, look at him!

Many thanks to Myro for sending this one along.

*(This is true only for certain very limited definitions of "incontrovertible".)

10 Responses to The ballerina dreams of Alchemoid

  1. WOW! Words escape me. And worse, I can’t look away. It’s like a horrible car wreck on the side of the road, you know you shouldn’t look but just can’t.

  2. William A. Peterson

    Now, if only you can get him to team up with Sparky Watts, from the last Blog entry! 😀

  3. Nick Hentschel

    This looks more like tap dancing, to me, than ballet.

  4. It could be tap dancing, where he’s clapping his heels together, but that wouldn’t explain the under-foot-slung tights. And also, a tap dancing reptilloid in a cod piece isn’t as funny as a ballerina reptilloid in a cod piece. Facts lose to humor every time.

  5. You’re both wrong. Alchemoid wants to replace Michael Flatley as “Lord of the Dance.”

  6. Alchemoid can’t replace Flatley. His arms are moving.

  7. Captain America’s astonished thoughts: *My god! Look how much static electricity he can generate with only half footsie pajammas.!!*

  8. Nod to Don Henley… “All Alchemoid wants to do is dance dance dance… And kick Cap’s ***.”

    What’s up with Captain America’s eye? It’s more reptilian than lightning lizard’s. And that geodesic background… so 1970s deco.

  9. Wow, Micheal Flatly (river dance) change his wardrobe person I see

  10. How about his gut hanging over the metal codpiece? You’d think all that dancing would take care of that.