Hippie chic rarely helps

When last we saw Angel, he was flitting about in one of the worst costumes to sport suspenders since Mork from Ork graced our national airwaves. Sadly for Warren Worthington III, his lifetime sentence of doom was not suspended, as he later was seen in this outfit:

Nothing says "Powerful Hero" like a low-cut shirt that reveals your navel while hiding your nipples.

At least his color sense is a bit less offensive, which in a different world would help absolve him for that ludicrous Eighties-vintage headband. Since this is not a different world, however, I have no choice but to mock it. Mock mock mock.

Which, oddly enough, sounds a lot like what appears to be coming from his mouth in this pose. It's bad enough they make him go out in public dressed like this, but then to draw him standing with that "I got the bad weed at Woodstock" expression and cockeyed stance, still dressed in yellow, that's just begging for more chicken jokes. To wit:

  1. He's plucky, I'll give him that.
  2. This costume is not exactly a feather in his cap.
  3. He really looks like a pecker.
  4. I'd scratch his eyes out if I saw him in public dressed that way.
  5. The Fashion Police will not be pinioning a medal on him any time soon.
  6. I bet his tailor was just winging it on this one.

I better stop now before I get arrested for Egregious Punning in a Public Forum. It's just good to know that no matter how lame my jokes are, they're still not as lame as Warren Worthington III's costumes.

(Image © Marvel Comics.)

27 Responses to Hippie chic rarely helps

  1. Kaldath says:

    WTF!, With that costume and that pose i can just hear the techno Music pumping out in the background!

  2. ajw says:

    no his costumes are a damn shame, and oddly never an obvious blunder such as a toga could have been, which incidentally would look better. Im just glad my 3rd favorite x man has was able get his fashion sense in order before i saw him for the first time.

  3. Patrick says:

    Hey it was the 70’s, everything was either plaid or open down to the navel.

  4. Dan says:

    I think Bad Super Costumes could be my favorite part of Hero Machine. Jeff, you crack me up with the comments you make. We need to keep this one going guys. I’m gonna keep trying to find costumes if you want me to.

  5. Me, Myself & I says:

    That is one mighty long finger on his left hand! I suppose most raptors have a longer middle digit. Sorry to say it but that includes chickens as well.

  6. Myro says:

    Dan (4): I’ve been helping Jeff out with ideas too. I’m pretty sure between the two of us, we could keep Jeff in bad costumes for another year.

  7. punkjay says:

    I think if you Have wings growing out your back, wearing yellow just screams chicken don’t you think?

  8. Jeff Hebert says:

    Thanks guys, glad you like these! More bad costumes are ALWAYS welcome, Dan, Myro, and a couple of others have been invaluable the last few weeks for sending these in, I definitely appreciate them.

  9. Dan says:

    Myro (6) I know you have, you’re my partner in awfulness. ; ) I was talking to the rest of the regulars, cause I don’t want to see Bad Costumes go away.

  10. B. Clouser says:

    I haven’t seen a V neck that deep since J Lo.

  11. B. Clouser says:

    Poor Angel. I think the people designing him actually kind of had it in for him because his character had some things going against him:

    1. He was blonde, blue-eyed, and RICH.

    2. His is name is Warren Kenneth Worthington the III…

    3. His hero persona is named…Angel.

    4. His power is….angel wings.

    Even as a kid I remember hating him be default on site. His name is angel…he has angel wings. Whoop-de-shit. Where’s my Wolverine?

    So I bet a little of this residual hatred happened when people were designing for his character.

    Lame character? Then why invest in a good costume? Just go with basics and get to the next design on the list for today.

    But at least he got to be Archangel for a little while:

    He went from that lame flying rich pretty boy an angel of death who could go toe to toe with Wolverine.

    His Archangel costume is interesting because it still is odd with its Blue-pink combo against silver wings. I suppose it was because his colors needed to reflect his creator Apocalypse.

    Too bad his feathery wings are back now…

  12. Worf says:

    Oh Jeff. It’s a good thing I work from home ’cause the way you had me laughing out loud would definitely have caused heads to turn if I were at the office.

    @MMI: I think someone had just “pulled his finger”… may be that’s why he has that weird face on….

  13. Myro says:

    I thought I had said enough about Angel last week in regards to how a rich superhero should dress himself, but with this costume, I had to add this one:

    Warren, I understand the TV show was called Solid Gold. Still, you shouldn’t infer that’s how rich people should dress.

    I know there are enough people here that are old enough to get that comment.

  14. Me Myself & I says:

    He he. I actually had the Solid Gold #16 casset tape.

  15. Dan says:

    I’m thinking more like Olivia Newton John’s Physical. Or He was a big fan of Hulk Hogan.

  16. Mr.MikeK says:

    @MM&I: AAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH! A little scared for you now. My parents were into Solid Gold although I think that Dad was more interested in the dancers than the bad pop. But then again, they liked disco. Even as a kid I knew disco was really bad, kinda like Angel’s outfit.

  17. Me, Myself & I says:

    They used to sell Solid Gold cassets at the gas stations around these parts when I was a kid and my parents bought a few. I ended up “inheriting” the one I mentioned. Not really sure what ever happened to it.

  18. Nicholas/GtaMythMaster43 says:

    I dunno, I think it works for the Hipster era.
    It looks like that Bi-guy who you know is always raving some where some place, getting in crazy mess’s you some how have to help him out of……God damn, comics now a days suck.

  19. punkjay says:

    Hey doesn’t he look like he’s sweatin’ to the oldies with richard simmons

  20. Brad says:

    Uh-oh, one of my characters wears red and gold armor. Should I be worried?

  21. Myro says:

    Brad (20): That depends. Would you say he looks more like Iron Man, who can pull those colors off? Or does he look more like Disco Duck here?

  22. Dan says:

    Since we are on the subject of Disco inspired messes, it made me think of this other red and yellow abomination.


  23. Speaking of Solid Gold dancers… Yes, this Angel costume just screams 80s porn. But so do these guys:


    “Cocaine’s a helluva drug.”

  24. Brad says:

    He’s definitely an iron man type. Here he is in DragonFable:

    And in Mechquest with the awesome guitar blade for comparison:

    So what say you, Myro? Am I in the clear?

  25. Myro says:

    Brad (24): Yeah, I think you’re fine. He looks pretty cool actually.

  26. Brad says:

    Thanks by the pounds! ^_^ Made my day. I think it’s time to saddle up and remake him in HM at last as either or both of the above.

  27. Me, Myself & I says:

    Here is an idea for a contest Jeff. How about giving a bad superhero costume review and have everyone come up with a new design for that bad costume?