Caption Contest 73

We've got a two-balloon Caption Contest this week, so make sure your funny is double-barreled, kids. If you can come up with the funniest replacement dialog for this comic book panel:

cc73-blank

You'll win any item, or a portrait of yourself, to be included in the final HeroMachine 3 program. The rules are simple:

  • No more than three entries per person;
  • All entries must be left as a comment (all in one comment or separate ones, doesn't matter) to this post;
  • Must be relatively clean, appropriate for broadcast on late-night network TV, for instance.

That's it! Good luck everyone, we'll post the Finalists for voting next Monday.

Oh, also, make sure it's obvious which part of your entry goes in which balloon. For instance:

Entry 1:
Balloon1 - "Don't make my hand angry!"
Balloon2 - "Because you won't like it when it's angry!"

Yes, that sucks, but it's on purpose so I don't scare you off with my Super Sense of Humor*.

* Actual Superman power.

60 Responses to Caption Contest 73

  1. Avatar Sol Invictus says:

    Balloon1 – “Not only am I the Hair Club President, you buffoon…”
    Balloon2 – “…I’M ALSO A CLIENT!!!”

  2. Avatar Gero says:

    Balloon 1: You’ve got my notes?
    Balloon 2: Well, I’ve got your nose!

  3. Avatar Jeremy says:

    Balloon 1: I told you to leave the Super Heroes ALONE!
    Balloon 2: I’m REALLY Sorry about this.

  4. Avatar Tim says:

    1)
    Balloon1: “Hey quick question!”
    Balloon2: “DOES THIS LOOK INFECTED TO YOU?!”

  5. Avatar Jake says:

    1.
    Balloon 1: So you want to join the Green Movement?
    Balloon 2: Welcome aboard!

  6. Avatar Jake says:

    2.
    Balloon 1: If you think my hand smells bad…
    Balloon 2: Get a whiff of this bird.

  7. Avatar Sol Invictus says:

    Entry 2:

    Balloon 1: “Although I can clearly see your hair, eyes, nose and mouth…”
    Balloon 2: “Let’s see who the man behind the mask REALLY is!”

  8. Avatar Patrick says:

    Balloon 1: I told you what would happen if you made me say it again…

    Balloon 2: When you sneeze, COVER YOUR MOUTH!

  9. Avatar DiCicatriz says:

    Balloon 1: I’ve been using a new lotion…
    Balloon2: Are my hands any softer?!?!

  10. Avatar Tim says:

    2)
    Balloon 1: “Hey! Get out of here!”
    Balloon 2: “I’m having a private moment!”

  11. Avatar TopHat says:

    1) Balloon 1: I want you too…
    Balloon 2: SNIFF MY FINGER!

    2) Balloon 1: Tell me…
    Balloon 2: DOES THIS LOOK INFECTED TO YOU?!

    3) Balloon 1: How dare you…
    Balloon 2: ASK ME FOR A PROMOTION!

  12. Avatar Danny Beaty says:

    Gang, let’s do this!

    1. Balloon 1:Don’t walk in on me…
    Balloon 2:when I’m changing!

    2. Balloon 1:Red means stop…
    Balloon 2:green means DIE!

    3. Balloon 1:My bird isn’t dead…
    Balloon 2:IT’S JUST RESTING!

  13. Avatar John says:

    1: My banana!
    2: YOU ATE MY BANANA!

  14. Avatar Dan Gonzalez says:

    Balloon 1: Can you feel my ANGER through this Vulcan Mind Meld?
    Baloon 2: All I asked was for you to FEED MY BIRD while I was AWAY!

  15. Avatar kingmonkey says:

    1: Talk to the hand–
    2: ‘CAUSE THE FACE AIN’T LISTENING!!

  16. Avatar CPrime says:

    1. “You recorded over the last episode of Glee???”
    2. “NOW YOU SHALL DIE!”

  17. Avatar Jack Zelger says:

    1: LIAR!
    2: This isn’t an Oprah’s Book Club selection!!

  18. Avatar PCFDPGrey says:

    1. Balloon 1: NO!!! You idiot!
    Balloon 2: THIS is how you do a facepalm!

    2. Balloon 1: Okay, I’m going to put my hand on your head and order the demons out…
    Balloon 2: Say, did my hand just turn green?

    3. Balloon 1: You have Disturbed Tiax the Grand! Such insolence!
    Balloon 2: Tiax will place a mark of shame upon your forehead!

  19. Avatar Val says:

    b1: I SAID!
    b2: Smell my finger.

    b1: arise chicken!
    b2: and HEAL THIS HATCHLING!

    b1: listen to your inner bovine
    b2: Give into the MOO!

  20. Avatar Aaron says:

    Balloon 1: I was doing my taxes…
    Balloon 2: You shall pay for your interruption

    Balloon 1: Mr. Hero…
    Balloon 2: You forgot to mention you hideout on your taxes.

    Balloon 1: Who am I….
    Balloon 2: Mr. Fantastic or the Green Goblin?

  21. Blue Blazer Blue Blazer says:

    B1: I told you…
    B2: I’ve HAD it with the green thumb jokes!

    B1: No, I didn’t miss a spot!
    B2: It’s called a “soul patch”!

    B1: I ask for a fresh banana…
    B2: And you bring me THIS!?

  22. Avatar The Imp says:

    B1: Yeah, yeah, I’m bald…
    B2: But you’ve got the booger hand on you!

    B1: You’re not so brave when I pull out…
    B2: The yellow vibrator of DOOM!

    B1: How many times have I told you?!
    B2: No costumes in the Dean’s office!

  23. Avatar JOJO65 says:

    first bubble: I don’t care if you are studying to be an anti-hero Mr. Rudgers.

    second bubble: THERE WILL BE NO SWEARING IN MY SCHOOL!!!

  24. Avatar Fernando says:

    Entry 1
    Balloon 1: Did not you hear President Nixon?
    Balloon 2: Watchmens are over!

    Entry 2
    Balloon 1: What did you say?
    Balloon 2: Heroes are not the work of consumerism, you hippie!

  25. Avatar Montana Player says:

    Entry 1
    Balloon 1: I now pass the curse onto you…
    Balloon 2: …cheese hand!

    Entry 2
    Balloon 1: It isn’t a bananna…
    Balloon 2: and I’m not happy to see you!

  26. Avatar Matt Cuellar says:

    Balloon 1: Give me-
    Balloon 2: -YOUR FACE!!!

  27. Avatar Riddlerclue says:

    Balloon 1: You said I would grow hair on my palms if I kept doing it….

    Balloon 2: BUT YOU NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THIS!

  28. Avatar Nancy says:

    1. Stop taking notes you fool!
    2. Learn to meditate like I do!

    1. Go Green to save the earth?
    2. I’ll show you Green!

    1. No library card?
    2. You kids are mindless idiots!

  29. Avatar Tim says:

    @TopHat: You might want to check out my #4 comment. We have the same entry.

  30. Avatar Tim says:

    3)
    B1: Calimah! Calimah!
    B2: Calimah!!!

  31. Avatar Bael says:

    B1 Don’t like to eat your bananas?
    B2 We’ll see about that!

  32. Avatar Frankie says:

    Balloon1: “Eat ‘green’ hand hero boy.”
    Balloon2: “It’s not only good for the enviroment, but it’s good for your colon too.”

  33. Avatar Frankie says:

    Balloon1: “Shut your hole. Your breath is foul.”
    Balloon2: “Arrgh! My hand. Now it is fowl.”

  34. Avatar Frankie says:

    Balloon1: “Yes, I am the Green Talon. But I’m still your teacher.”
    Balloon2: “So, if you let me win, I’ll change your score. Agreed?”

  35. Balloon1:”It’s not just any hand.
    Balloon2:”It’s a DFS hand ,oh and it’s green.

  36. Avatar Ghost says:

    Balloon1: “What nice hair you have…”
    Balloon2: “We wants it!!!”

  37. Avatar Aaron says:

    ok I know I did my 3 so don’t count this one…I just couldn’t resist one more.

    Balloon 1: That’s enough Ryan!
    Balloon 2: Will Colin Mocarie always e teased for his lack of hair?

  38. Avatar Tyrskald says:

    Entry I
    Balloon 1: “So you want my Rocketeer-brand personal massager!?!”
    Balloon 2: “Nuh-uh! Talk to the HAND!!!”

    Entry II
    Balloon 1: “You should have read the sign, Mr. Stretchpants–”
    Balloon 2: “–No Talking In The Library!!!”

    Entry III
    Balloon 1: “Good, you HAVE heard of Twister…!”
    Balloon 2: “Say ‘Hello’ to Left Hand Green!”

  39. Avatar remy says:

    Balloon 1: DON’T MAKE FUN OF MY ACTION FIGURE! Balloon 2: HE HAS KARATE CHOP POWERS!

    Entry 2
    Balloon 1: HE’S NOT A DOLL! HE’S AN ACTION FIGURE!
    BALLOON2: SAY IT! SAY HE’S AN ACTION FIGURE

  40. Avatar PRiegel says:

    Balloon 1: I have one question, Liefeld…
    Balloon 2: WHERE ARE MY FEET?

    Balloon 1: You give me the bird?
    Balloon 2: I give you the FINGERS!

  41. Avatar spidercow2010 says:

    This is not an entry, just a nitpick: Ever try to say “MMMFF” through gritted teeth?

  42. Avatar Gero says:

    Balloon 1: For the last time
    Balloon 2: STOP TOUCHING MY STUFF!!

  43. Avatar Letrune says:

    Balloon 1: So you sold those “corrected” rates for students…
    Balloon 2: …Well, no more! You are banned!

    Balloon 1: I teach you to respect…
    Balloon 2: …the Superprincipal!

    Balloon 1: So, you think red and blue goes well together?
    Balloon 2: How about different colors of green? H?!

  44. Avatar X-stacy says:

    B1: I don’t want your damn tracts!
    B2: I already HAVE a religion!

  45. Avatar NGpm says:

    Balloon 1:I say, I say, I feel the power
    Balloon 2:NOW BE HEALED!

  46. Avatar Ballin' Boy says:

    Balloon 1: What did the 5 fingers say to the face?
    Balloon 2: SLAP!!

  47. Avatar NGpm says:

    LOL! Do I look like the kind of guy that would put his green fingahs all over somebody’s face? Yeah I remember doin’ that.

  48. Avatar Mr.MikeK says:

    Balloon 1: This Ain’t Sparta!
    Balloon 2: This Is Madness!

    Balloon 1: Fool!
    Balloon 2: Don’t bother me when I’m finger-painting!

  49. Avatar X-stacy says:

    B1: STOP IT!
    B2: No more jokes about my little cock!

    (Okay, so that one will get summarily dismissed as a contender. But a cock was a male bird first, you know…).

  50. Avatar SongBird says:

    1)
    Balloon 1: I told you, son…
    Balloon 2: THIS is what messing with those hookers will do to ya!

    2)
    Balloon 1: Since you like eating bananas so much….
    Balloon 2: Does THIS look ripe enough, for ya?!

    3)
    Balloon 1: Green? Doesn’t know how to man the desk?

    Ballon 2: WHO THE HELL PUT YOU IN CHARGE, ANYWAY!?!?!?

  51. Avatar NGpm says:

    Entry Number 2:

    Balloon 1: BEHOLD!
    Balloon 2: My kung fu action arm grip ™!

  52. Avatar HalLoweEn JacK says:

    Entry 1:
    1. For the last time,
    2. BE QUIET IN THE LIBRARY!

  53. Avatar HalLoweEn JacK says:

    Entry 2:
    1. I asked for this hankie over an hour ago,
    2. AND NOW LOOK WHAT’S HAPPENED!

  54. Avatar Nathan says:

    1. Get that Gum out of your mouth!
    2. It’s mine!

  55. Avatar Gero says:

    Balloon 1: For the last time: Rusty Venture
    Balloon 2: DOESN’T DO AUTOGRAPHS!!

    (you have to admit it looks like him, just with a white beard instead of an orange one…)

  56. Avatar Alex says:

    Entry 1:
    1.If you want me to stop say:
    2.mMMFf!

  57. Avatar Alex says:

    Entry 2:
    1.If you don,t like my green hand…
    2.wait till you smell my GREEN FOOT!

  58. Avatar D says:

    Balloon 1 I’m about to flip you…
    Balloon 2 …THE BIRD!

    Balloon 1: Mad? Of course I’m not mad!
    Balloon 2: Even my canary will tell you that!

  59. Avatar Alex says:

    Entry 3:
    1.See this is what happens when you shake hands with Al Gore!
    2.Learn from my mistakes!

  60. Avatar Al says:

    Entry 1:
    Balloon 1: You know the rule!
    Balloon 2: I’M the only one who can do facepalms!

    Entry 2:
    Balloon 1: Hand!
    Balloon 2: Apply directly to the forehead!

    Entry 3:
    Balloon 1: For God’s sake!
    Balloon 2: I gotta pop that frickin’ zit!