Caption Contest 68 – The game is afoot!

Starting this week I am moving contests to Mondays*, so heads-up on that. And to "kick" off the change, your challenge this week is to come up with the funniest replacement dialog for this blank comic book panel:

maxx-3-1993-sam-keith-toenails

Yeah, good luck with that! The rules are simple:

  • Entries must be made as a comment (or comments) to this post;
  • Keep it relatively clean (appropriate for late-night broadcast TV at worst);
  • No more than three entries per person, so use your best stuff!

I'll announce a winner next Monday, who will receive their choice of either any item of their choice, or a portrait of themselves, either of which will be included in the final HeroMachine 3 version.

Good luck everyone!

(Image and characters © Sam Kieth and Image Comics.)

*The current character contest will be judged tomorrow as per the old system, with the next coming next Monday instead of next Tuesday, then we'll be completely on the new schedule.

40 Responses to Caption Contest 68 – The game is afoot!

  1. Avatar Pyrate Hyena says:

    And that’s how to clean your teeth with your toe-nail.

  2. Avatar Runt 82 says:

    1) Look Maxx, as long as we’re stuck here in this stomach, we got to eat whatever we can to stay alive.

  3. Avatar Runt 82 says:

    2) …and this little piggy had its freakin’ head bitten off.

  4. Avatar jack says:

    I’ll never know how I got Bubble gum on my foot, but it’s not coming off.

  5. Avatar Runt 82 says:

    3)

    I will not eat them with an ax.
    I will not eat them with The Maxx.
    I do not like them Sam I Am.
    I do not like green eggs and toejam.

  6. Avatar Jeff Hebert says:

    WOW, Runt, you are setting the bar AWFULLY high here, your last two are instant classics, really funny!

  7. Avatar PCFDPGrey says:

    1. Maxx, picking your nose is really disgusting… Hang on a sec, gotta hang nail…
    2. May I interest anyone else in some toe jam? Made fresh daily and really tasty.
    3. Well, you ASKED what my super power was…

  8. Avatar Patrick says:

    … anyway, I don’t know why I am not asked out on dates more often.

  9. Avatar John says:

    “…who knew dadgum fungus was so freakin’ elastic?”

  10. Avatar amathakathi says:

    See, if I pull real hard I’ll get pointy limbs just like you!

  11. Avatar amathakathi says:

    what do you mean my manners are as gross as my anatomy?!

  12. Avatar SongBird says:

    1. SEE what happens when you call me anorexic? Do you SEE what happens when you pressure me to eat more!

    2. And mother said that I’d never run a successful pedicure business. Boy, am I showing her.

    3. This is all you get for 25 cents. The real naughty stuff will cost you extra!

  13. Avatar amathakathi says:

    Oh yeah? I don’t see SPAWN getting grossed out when I do this.

  14. Avatar Niall Mor says:

    This is not a caption, but a comment. I’m not even sure what’s going on in that panel. I’m not even sure I want to know. 🙂

  15. Avatar Jeff Hebert says:

    Don’t feel bad, Niall, I read the comic and I still don’t know what is going on there.

  16. Avatar the creator says:

    who makes these wraps so hard to open?!?

  17. Avatar Gero says:

    1. The last one is always the hardest to get off!

  18. Avatar Danny Beaty says:

    1. I’ve got this one nailed!

    2. I’m so mad I could chew nails!

    3. I use a similar technique to remove hemmorrhoids. I’m very flexible.

  19. Avatar D says:

    1. So? I ran out of dental floss! Sue me!

    2. Save a toothpick, save a forest!

    3. What?! You think my feet smell? How do you think I feel?

  20. Avatar Hakoon1 says:

    1) You should see how I shave my legs!

  21. Avatar Jordan Banta says:

    Huh? whos foot did you say this was? oh well, i’m gonna eat it anyway.

  22. Avatar MartianBlue says:

    Not a very good entrant, but at least I can say I tried.
    Darn these blasted rubber nails, I don’t care if they are “all the craze”.

  23. Deadpool42 Deadpool42 says:

    1). What? my doctr said to avoid fruits and nuts, after all you are what you eat!

    2). I tell you one thing. I’v been to a parallel universe, I’ve seen time running backards, I’ve played snooker with the solar system, I’ve given birth to octuplets, but never in my life did I ever think my foot was so, darn, tasty!

    3). Health food may be good for the conscience but human flesh tastes a hell of alot better!

  24. Avatar chaetophile says:

    (said with teeth clenched)

    1 Who the HELL crosses a skunk with a forcufine!

    2 Awesone. It worked. The nanagers on his way over now.

    3 Just don’t do anything endarrassing when you neet her.

  25. Avatar Tango says:

    1. That Lamisil TV Commercial made it look so much easier!
    2. I should have trimmed this nail years ago.
    3. Soon as I’m done with mine, let’s do yours.

  26. Avatar kyle says:

    1. mmmm taste like chicken legs.
    2.this is what we get for making the hulk hungry.
    3.what maxx i chew on my toe nails to think.

  27. Avatar PsyckoSama says:

    OM! NOM! NOM! NOM!

  28. Avatar jack says:

    What are you looking at, this is what happens when you sleep with bubblegum-man.

  29. Avatar superawesomecoolman says:

    1. See? I did it! now where’s my money?
    2. my teeth are so sharp, i can bite someone’s toe off! See?look at-AAAUUGGHH

    (is it just me, or does the chair- or whatever it is- look like a person kind of?)

  30. Avatar Jericho says:

    1. Nope, I don’t have a clue what it is, but I’m going to eat it. Don’t judge me.
    2. So there I was, walking along the beach minding my own business, when BAM! Tar ball.
    3. What was that you said about sticking the gum behind my ear?

  31. Avatar Asherian says:

    1. And they used to laugh at me for keeping just the one nail extra long.
    2. Don’t hate me for my dental hygiene concerns.
    3. And thats how we always did it back when we were kids.

  32. Avatar Legatus says:

    I have no idea, why they call YOU a monster!

  33. Avatar Mr.MikeK says:

    1. Feet, Feet, Wonderful feet! Good for walkin’ ‘n’ great to eat!
    2. I thought you said you had a foot fetish!
    3. What?! Uncle Artie used to love to watch me do this!

    Jeff, thanks for pulling up the only Image comic I read. It’s the only one where the weird bulging muscles made sense.

  34. Avatar Gero says:

    2. Hey, at least I HAVE toes, you Wicked Witch wannabe!

  35. Avatar MartianBlue says:

    Hey Jeff, I posted this a few days ago in another thread, but I guess you didn’t see it.
    Male Alternate
    Fat Body
    Left Arm
    Not Working

  36. Avatar Demented The Clown says:

    @Jeff When We See The Masthead Results? Or Are We Gunna Vote?

  37. Avatar Jeff Hebert says:

    Good question, DTC. Usually I’d pick one and post the result whenever I got to it in the afternoon. But I might do a voting thing instead, we’ll see.

    Regardless, the post’ll probably go up early this afternoon (sooner if I can swing it). It takes a bit to download all the images while renaming them with the entrant’s screen name, picking one, then writing up the post.

  38. Avatar Nancy says:

    “If I can just (tug) activate (tug) my secret Toe Swiss Army Knife…”

  39. Avatar Nancy says:

    Sccrrape…Crunchhh.. home pedicures stink!

  40. Avatar Nancy says:

    “I’m, like sooo over this toe nail polish.”