Caption Contest 35: Honey, I'm home!

I'm not sure how this one will turn out, but here goes your caption contest challenge for this week:


Come up with the best dialog to fill the blank balloon and you'll win your very own custom black and white illustration of whatever you like (within reason), like these! The rules are simple: No more than three entries per person; leave yours in the comments to this post; and keep it clean (appropriate for broadcast prime time TV). That's it!

So get your thinking caps on and win, baby win!

59 Responses to Caption Contest 35: Honey, I'm home!

  1. Blue Blazer Blue Blazer says:

    1) No means no, you pig!
    2) C’mere, Thing! Lemme pop that “white head” for ya!
    3) Now that you’re sober, do you still think I’m beautiful?

  2. Avatar pdf says:

    HAHA¡ i told you i could get uglyer than you with cosmics, now gimme my five bucks you thing¡

  3. Avatar DJ says:


    2.No…I was not in the GOONIES!

    3. I feel pretty..oh so pretty!

  4. Avatar Rj MCd says:

    “hey benny i’m bunnygirl from myspace”

  5. Avatar HalLoweEn JacK says:

    1. Ah! Papparazzi! …er… Oops, I did it again?

  6. Avatar HalLoweEn JacK says:


  7. Avatar HalLoweEn JacK says:

    3. Only $20?!? C’mon, you usually pay twice that!

  8. Avatar Abron(duh) says:

    I’m Wonder Woman…or i will be for 5$(under breath) not..

  9. Avatar Lyogi says:

    How dare you lie on your eHarmony account! You are not as hot in person.

  10. Avatar TheNate says:

    Excuse me, are those Bugle Boy Jeans you’re wearing?

  11. Avatar bgh2 says:

    Do these clothes look good on me?

  12. Avatar Rick says:

    Whose your Mama??!!

  13. Avatar Rick says:

    I’m your biggest fan!

  14. Avatar Rick says:

    Yancy Street Makeover my ass!!!

  15. Avatar Ben says:

    my caption would Be “pardon me but would you have any grey poupon”

  16. Avatar Jeff Hebert says:

    Props to Rick for a great old-school reference!! I haven’t thought about the Yancy Street Irregulars in ages.

  17. Avatar Rick says:

    I put the “old” in “old-school” baby!

  18. Avatar DJ says:

    Hey I referenced both the Elephant Man and the Goonies. That’s pretty old school for someone born in 91′

  19. Avatar Whit says:

    1) Come give Auntie a big kiss!

  20. Avatar William A. Peterson says:

    “Does this outfit make me look fat? Be honest…”

  21. Avatar jude gallagher says:

    “Son, you will wear your hat and coat outside!”

  22. Avatar jude gallagher says:

    “Oh yeah well, Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank they turn off surveillance cameras.”

  23. Avatar Loki says:



  24. Avatar jude gallagher says:

    “You should try this new moisturizer its made from peanut butter and jelly.”

  25. Avatar Level says:

    See, I made myself like you, now we can be together forever.

  26. Avatar Meg says:

    1) Michael Jackson smash! Michael Jackson never stop getting plastic surgery!

    2)Honey? Does this crusty greenish skin make me look fat?

    3) Why don’t we just say we both looked better on the internet and leave it at that?

  27. Avatar C. Yusuf Mumaz says:

    1. Oh, and you think YOU need mask?

    2. … and this, my dear, is a previously unknown side effect of Phen-Phen..

    3. Those people at Maybelliene… I’ll give’em a real challenge!

  28. Avatar The Icedaemon says:

    1: What? You were coming on to me on the forum…

    2: You ain’t so hot yourself Thingy.

    3: Look, Johnny paid me ten bucks for this blind date, so let’s just get on with it.

  29. Avatar Spyguy149 says:

    Hey Hey You You I don’t like your girlfriend.

    Once you go ugly you never go back.

    Honey remind me to sue our plastic surgen tomorrow.

  30. Avatar TheNate says:

    Ding dong! Avon calling!

  31. Avatar Bael says:

    “Hey, that’s a nice coat…”

  32. Avatar Nombo says:

    1: “You are NOT going out dressed like that young lady.”
    2: “OH MY GOD! You look HORRIBLE with ginger hair.”
    3: “Hi, I’m Amy Whinehouse, where do you want me? You dont recognise me because im sober!”

  33. Avatar Fabien says:

    I will destroy the humanity, ah, ah, ah !!!!

  34. Avatar Gregg says:

    All who know physical desire burn at the touch of the Woman-Thing!

  35. Avatar Joshua says:

    Twick or Tweet, Rorshach!

  36. Avatar Collex says:

    – Hey Ben,it’s me, She-Hulk! Love your Roshrach costume!

  37. Avatar Collex says:

    – Oh MY GOD. It’s Rocky! Can you sign my breasts please???!!!

  38. Avatar Neil Leslie says:

    Whaddaya mean this isn’t a good look for me?

    Whaadaya mean this outfit is so last season?

    Whaddaya mean green isn’t my color?

    (Sorry, I got nothin’ this week) 🙂

  39. Avatar Jester says:

    1. The roast beef… *voice warping* NOT… OVERCOOKED!!!!

    2. Me Carly! Ready for blind date?

  40. Avatar The Doomed Pixel says:

    “Dad, I think I’m allergic to bees!”

  41. Avatar Cory says:

    1. I said I wanted…NEW…SHOES!!!

    2. Its that time of the month…

    3. I said I wanna go home…NOW!!!

  42. Avatar John D says:

    1. I…want….MIDOL!!!!!!!!

    2. Let’s go to bed. I need my beauty sleep.

    3. Geez..when they said couples start to look alike, they weren’t kidding!! Yeesh!!

  43. Avatar MontanaPlayer says:

    1. Our children will be beautiful!
    2. If you think I look bad, you should see the other lady.
    3. I warned you I’d end up looking my mother some day!

  44. Avatar God Of Plague says:

    1. Change You Got Change.

    2. Beer $1.50, Vodka Martini $5.00, the morning after priceless.

    3. I’m too sexy for my shirt too sexy.

  45. Avatar Dennis says:

    “Whaddya mean no good night kiss?!”

  46. Kaldath Kaldath says:

    I am the love child of The Hulk and The Swamp Thing. Call me MUCK OAF!!!!

  47. Avatar Frankie says:

    “See, I told you I was a size eight.”

  48. Avatar Frankie says:

    “Ben, I am your mother. Come, join me to the dark side.”

  49. Avatar Frankie says:

    “OK, just this one time for you Benny. PUT IT ON THE RIIIIIIII-IIIIIIIITTTZZ!!”

  50. “Honey, I ate the kid”

  51. Vengeance Vengeance says:

    Does any body really know what time it is ??

    You don’t need to be sexy baby I just want your kiss

    No no never hread of the Toxic Avenger

  52. vengeance vengeance says:

    that should be heard not hread

  53. Avatar Ballin' Boy says:

    My Milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.

  54. Avatar Ballin' Boy says:

    I’m not the guy from Robocop

  55. Avatar Ballin' Boy says:

    I feel weird. Do I look ok?

  56. Avatar Cam says:

    1) “and the winner of the ugliest dog competition is…”

  57. Avatar Force32 says:

    Mum what did I tell you about the affects of illegal plastic surgery

  58. Avatar marx says:

    Are there PEANUTS in this candy?

  59. Avatar Kramer says:

    1. “You’re looking at my comb-over, aren’t you?”
    2. “This was the most expensive toupee I could afford!”
    3. “What? This is what all the hottest kids are wearing this year!”