Screamers

From the pages of “The Butcher” No. 4 (©1990, Mike Baron and Shea Anton Pensa), we learn that all characters in comic books must scream all dialog at each other, whether that be while flying a plane ...

Plane screamy

... while calmly discussing what the situation does or does not call for ...

I don’t think the situation calls for screaming, either, bro.

... while asking a polite question after getting your jaw accidentally unhinged ...

Is your mother a snake, or what?!

... while getting so frustrated watching two pilots shout everyday dialog at each other that your eyes explode into lightning bolts (I'm speaking from personal experience here) ...

Dreads and vampire fangs, just like we did it in the old country.

... while either piloting or co-piloting with your eyes closed and sitting in a chair made of squared-off cement ...

Seriously, doesn’t your mouth get dried out from leaving it open like that all the time?

... while getting groped by a stranger when you're a grandmother and poking him back with a Finger of Outrage ...

If she’s that old there’s no WAY he’s groping in the right place …

... while whispering for the love of Pete ...

Inside voice you fool!

... or just while using incredibly exaggerated gestures to show some doofus what this mysterious thing called a "bow" is.

Maybe if the Invisible Woman and Green Arrow had a child he’d be the Invisible Arrow, but till then, you just look silly.

I'm pretty sure I know now why he's The Butcher -- that's the only way he could come up with to shut everyone the hell up and get some sleep.

4 Responses to Screamers

  1. those illustrations make my brain hurt.

  2. Do these folks live on the Planet of the Perpetually PO’ed People? How’s that for alliteration? 🙂

  3. Seriously do you have nothing better to do? How can you not feel at least a little bad that all you do is look at and read comics and don’t go and experience the real world. I’m not trying to be mean I want you to live life fully. I hope this helps.

  4. If you’re right and I AM that pathetic, how much worse is it that you sit around posting disparaging comments about people who sit around reading comics all day? Isn’t that like making fun of golfers for not being real athletes while you sit around playing golf video games?