Skate Man!

Whoever said you couldn't mix roller skates, ninjas, and disco was an America-hating fool, that's what I say, for behold the jaw-dropping awesomeness that is ... Skate Man!

Skate Man
Skate Man Skaaash

As impressive as his manly physique and roller skating prowess are, I think what most astounds me is his ability to keep his knee-socks pulled up no matter how rough the battle. The same technology is, I think, used to keep his headkerchief blowing back like a little miniature cape for his noggin. That thing is always flapping in a breeze, I don't know how me manages it.

I also wish more super heroes had the fashion courage to wear tight thigh shorts along with their sweat shirts; that "Flashdance" look really needs to come back.

What really sells the outfit, though, is his man-purse, which is only just visible in the cover shot. Skate Man was hip before hip was cool, my friends, although you already knew that from his crazy rollerskating roots. It's much more visible in this image, featuring Skate Man working with the disadvantaged youths of the neighborhood by passing out hand grenades. What a guy!

I can't wait for the "Sadie Hawkins" encounter, where the girl supers get to ask him to roller dance for a change! That will be awesome.

(Image and character ©1983, Neal Adams, “Skateman”, No. 1.)