This week’s “Random Monday Mashup”, wherein I take one (and only one) panel from ten randomly chosen comic books to try and make a story, features the adventures of Baja Wally, sex-ed teacher from the future. Plus roller skaters!
Mr. Creepy walks home from an adult movie he has just screened with a new-met young friend, who is discussing the film’s starlet:
“Like what films?” Mr. Creepy’s friend asks.
Continuing his pedantic rage-fueled rant, Mr. Creepy recounts the plot of the film they’d indeed seen just a few short minutes before, about a sex ed instructor named Baja Wally who invents a large-and-in-charge laser heat boyfriend robot of, ah, a certain size.
The students in his sex-ed class are duly impressed, male and female alike:
Unfortunately the inventor, Baja Wally, isn’t as experienced a controller as the robot body’s overgenerous proportions might promise, and he quickly panics:
Alas, Baja Wally does indeed intensify the rebound effect with explosive, catastrophic results, destroying his sex-ed robot, and leading to a long class debate that ultimately sends one of the students into a fit of rage!
The passion spreads to more and more students, who come up with their own solutions:
And grapple together they do, trading costumes as fast as they do classmates, up to and including both a bad cravat and an even worse leather mask:
Ringing the doorbell is none other than the kids from Skateboarding Swingers 101 down the hall, looking for a good time!
Eventually Baja Wally repairs his robot and everyone earns an “A” that year, including Mr. Creepy’s fine, young, Baja-Wally-Robot-Sized young friend, so all’s well that ends well!
Notes and References:
The issues from which the above images are taken are, in order:
- “Amazing Heroes”, No. 111, ©1987, Fantagraphics Books, Inc. This book is a challenge for these Mash-Ups, as it’s essentially a black and white magazine about the comic book industry at the time, featuring interviews, previews, reviews, and so on without a story at all.
- “Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight”, No. 33, ©1992, DC Comics, Inc.
- “The Heckler”, No. 1, ©1992, DC Comics, Inc. This character is a Keith Giffen-drawn wisecracking super a la Bugs Bunny and The Creeper. There’s a very Steve Ditko vibe to the whole thing.
- “Amazing Heroes”, No. 104, ©1986, Fantagraphics Books, Inc.
- “Zot!”, No. 1, ©1984, Eclipse Enterprises. Zot was created by Scott McCloud, who later went on to write what I consider the greatest academic treatment to date of comics as a medium, “Understanding Comics.” I’m very pleased to have found these two issues in the Great Random Horde.
- “Legion Science Police”, ©1989, DC Comics, Inc. I had no idea they’d even put out a book about the Science Police of the “Legion of Super Heroes” world, neat!
- “Zot!”, No. 2, ©1984, Eclipse Enterprises.
- “Amazing Heroes”, No. 132, ©1988, Fantagraphics Books, Inc. This issue features a great interview with Howard Chaykin, who was the hottest thing going at the time with “American Flagg”.
- “Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight”, No. 12, ©1990 DC Comics, Inc. Batman kicks a fat guy in the face. A lot.
- “Skateman”, No. 1, ©1983, Neal Adams. Yes, that Neal Adams. This is the single greatest comic book I have yet come across in the Great Random Horde; expect to see more of Skateman in the coming days.