This week it's simple, we review Batman. 2000 words only, so don't waste them all on savaging Batman & Robin. Next week will be Lord Of The Rings.
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The Nerdmudgeon Podcast
Three middle-aged nerds (including yours truly!) review all of the MCU movies in chronological order. Short, funny, and full of good vibes, check it out and let us know what you think! Nerdmudgeon.com
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The Secret Lair
Batman: 1943 serial released by Columbia Pictures.
Starring Lewis Wilson as Batman.
Directed by Lambert Hillyer.
Plot: Batman is depicted as a patriotic government agent chasing Japanese saboteurs led by Dr. Daka during WWII.
Unique elements: Introduced the Batcave and its grandfather clock entrance, as well as a skinny Alfred.
Why it was good: Flawed as it was, its the very first appearance of Batman on the silver screen.
Why it was bad: It was filled with so much racism that Batman should have worn a white hood.
Quality rating: 1 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 5 of 5.
Batman and Robin: 1949 serial released by Columbia Pictures.
Starring Robert Lowery as Batman.
Directed by Sam Katzman.
Plot: Batman and Robin chasing (and finally unmasking in Chapter 15) an original villain called the Wizard.
Unique elements: The first on-screen appearances of both Vicki Vale and Commissioner Gordon.
Why it was good: It ditched the previous patriotic jingoism and was much more faithful to the comic.
Why it was bad: This serial had a budget that was found in the cracks of the producer’s couch.
Quality rating: 2 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 2 of 5.
Batman: 1966 film released by 20th Century Fox.
Starring Adam West as Batman.
Directed by Leslie H. Martinson.
Plot: The Joker, Penguin, Riddler and Catwoman attempt to kidnap a group of leading UN delegates.
Unique elements: Introduced new versions of the Bat-Copter, the Bat-Boat and the Bat-cycle. Plus, it had a shark.
Why it was good: If you like over the top camp and/or lots and lots of weed, then this is the film for you.
Why it was bad: If you don’t like over the top camp that simply rehashes the 60’s TV show, this film sucks.
Quality rating: 2 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 4 of 5.
Batman: 1989 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring Michael Keaton as Batman.
Directed by Tim Burton.
Plot: The Joker terrorizes Gotham City until Batman hunts him down and kills him.
Unique elements: The Joker was given a name and replaced Joe Chill as the killer of Bruce’s parents.
Why it was good: The Gotham City setting. At first I thought sure it was shot on location in Cleveland.
Why it was bad: The Batplane just happened to have the right gadget to destroy the right number of toxic balloons.
Quality rating: 4 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 5 of 5.
Batman Returns: 1992 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring Michael Keaton as Batman.
Directed by Tim Burton.
Plot: Penguin and Catwoman team up with Christopher Walken to take over Gotham City and raise Cain.
Unique elements: The Penguin was ret-conned as a mutant and Catwoman as a blonde crazy person.
Why it was good: Danny DeVito’s Penguin was truly evil, and Catwoman was truly mad. Plus, Pee Wee!
Why it was bad: Yet again, Beetlejuice unmasks himself simply to get into his girlfriends knickers.
Quality rating: 3 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 4 of 5.
Batman Forever: 1995 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring Val Kilmer as Batman.
Directed by Joel Schumacher.
Plot: Two-Face teams up with the Riddler to mind-control all of the good citizens of Gotham City.
Unique elements: First depiction of Arkham Asylum, where Bruce Wayne’s psychiatrist/girl friend works.
Why it was good: Bruce’s new girlfriend helps him deal with the trauma of witnessing his parent’s murder.
Why it was bad: The director aped the style of the 1960’s television show without any of its dubious charms.
Quality rating: 2 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 4 of 5.
Batman & Robin: 1997 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring George Clooney as Batman.
Directed by Joel Schumacher.
Plot: Cramming as many characters into the film as possible to cover the lack of a coherent plot.
Unique elements: Four words: rubber nipples and neon.
Why it was good: It wasn’t.
Why it was bad: This would require four more articles of this size.
Quality rating: 0 of 5. Some portions reach negative numbers.
Bizarre rating: 5 of 5. But not in a good way.
Batman Begins: 2005 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring Christian Bale as Batman.
Directed by Christopher Nolan.
Plot: Bruce Wayne betrays his mentor Ra’s al Ghul, who follows him home to Gotham City for revenge.
Unique elements: First live action film depicting the Scarecrow, Ra’s al Ghul, Lucius Fox and Wayne Enterprises.
Why it was good: It used an absolute minimum of CGI to achieve rather spectacular stunts and effects.
Why it was bad: The film threw out 30 years of admittedly convoluted continuity to combine the Golden and Silver Ages.
Quality rating: 4 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 2 of 5.
atman’s new origin story.
The Dark Knight: 2008 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring Christian Bale as Batman.
Directed by Christopher Nolan.
Plot: The Joker and Two-Face, both of whom are nuttier than squirrel turds, are supreme agents of chaos.
Unique elements: Batman’s Orwellian super-mega-hyper-ultra cosmic magical eavesdropping device.
Why it was good: Heath Ledger as the Joker got a well deserved (and sadly posthumous) Academy Award.
Why it was bad: Several rather gaping plot holes will distract the critically thinking audience members.
Quality rating: 5 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 4 of 5.
The Dark Knight Rises: 2012 film released by Warner Brothers.
Starring Christian Bale as Batman.
Directed by Christopher Nolan.
Plot: Talia al Ghul, Catwoman and Bane combine forces in order to destroy Batman and take over Gotham City.
Unique elements: First live-action appearance of Talia al Ghul, and Jim Gordon learns Batman’s identity.
Why it was good: The convoluted plot and its many twists put M. Night Shamalamadingdong to shame.
Why it was bad: Several more gaping plot holes are overshadowed by the fact that Batman RETIRED!!!
Quality rating: 4 of 5.
Bizarre rating: 3 of 5.
great reviews, I enjoyed it.
I wasn’t even aware of the older ones.
Thanks!