Caption Contest 48: BRAM!

I wanted to do a caption contest with a big ol' onomontoPOWia, so here you go! Come up with the best replacement dialog for this panel and you'll win your very own custom black and white illustration of whatever you like (within reason):


The rules are simple: No more than three entries per person; all entries must be left in the comments to this post; and try to keep it clean (appropriate for late-night TV). You have one week, the winner will be chosen and announced next Tuesday.

Good luck everyone!

75 Responses to Caption Contest 48: BRAM!

  1. amathakathi says:

    1. ZZTop couldn’t make it so I…

    2. Ahh! That kick made my ankle swell up!

    3. You damn kids get off my lawn!

  2. Xstacy says:

    Ya gotta stomp these nonsense words before they breed.

  3. hookman says:

    I’m sorry Bram but there can be only one ridiculous thing in this panel and thats me!

  4. Danny Beaty says:

    1. MY NAME AIN’T “BRAM”!



  5. Runt82 says:

    1) It was supposed to be BATTERING RAM, but there wasn’t much space left after my gigantic foot.

  6. Runt82 says:

    2) Damn those banana peels!

    3) There’s two scoops of pain in Kellog’s Raisin Bram.

  7. Runt82 says:

    EDIT: Kellog’s should be Kellogg’s

  8. Niall Mor says:

    Trick or Treat! Smell my–Oh, what the hell!

  9. Jose Inoa says:

    [*Not an entry] #3 is awesome, Runt82!! 🙂

  10. bgh2 says:

    Yes, that’s my foot!

  11. Joshua says:

    1). Here’s a lil’ bit of “sole” for you, Dracula!

  12. DJ says:

    1.Time too kick ass and chew bubblegum… and im all outta gum


    3.”It’s NERF or nothing!”

  13. Ballin' Boy says:

    You want me to f***in trash your lights? Then why are you trashin my scene?

    Sorry, probably not appropriate, but it had to done

  14. Ballin' Boy says:

    Cool hair, tough as heck, and every bit as racist. Don’t mess with the Dog 2.0

  15. Ballin' Boy says:


  16. D says:

    I know what you’re thinkin’. Did I wipe my feet before I kicked your door down. Well, did ya, punk?

    One small step for Bram, one giant leap for Bramkind!

    Someone get this word outta my way! It’s blockin’ ma dramatic entrance!

  17. Frankie says:

    “Cut, cut, cut! You cue the BRAM! when I fire the gun, not when I kick the door.”

  18. John says:

    *THIS* is a left foot!

  19. Frankie says:

    “I’ve jsut escaped Liefeld’s “artistic” clutches and I need a real background STAT.”

  20. Frankie says:

    “What? !MARB…?? What does that mean?”

  21. The Grizz says:

    Chuck Norris, I AM YOUR FATHER!!!

  22. The Doomed Pixel says:

    1) Set phasers to “nonsensical noises”!

  23. Whit says:

    1) Stoker’s Dracula!

  24. Whit says:

    2) Look out, I’ve got an unnecessary pouch in my sights!

  25. Hootscheese says:

    “Do you know what I mean, Vern?”

  26. miggo says:

    1) POW! POW! POW!
    2) Here comes.. PINKY! [<- pls color PINKY pink and bold 😉 ]

  27. miggo says:

    Thought of a third one:
    3) I brought you a cookie.. but I eated it!

  28. Rick says:

    1. “Say hello to my lil’ friend!”

    2. “I got ya Wolverine, right here!”

    3. “These boots were made for walking, and that’s just what they’ll do…”

  29. Blue Blazer says:

    1. The pouch has attached itself to my boot!
    2. My gun must’ve been made in China.
    3. I am NOT Dale Earnheardt!

  30. Fishpants says:

    1. Now I gonna brast you!
    2. That Bram Stoker was a bad mutha–
    3. Wow, I gotta change my boot ringtone.

  31. Bael says:

    1) Landshark!

    2) Room Service! Who ordered the butt kicking?

  32. Ed H says:

    1) Uck Uck Uck! Great balls o’ fire, and bodacious!


    2)…Stoker’s Dracula, coming soon to a theater near you!

    3) I can get off ONE GOOD SHOT before I FALL FLAT ON MY ASS!

  33. Lies and Perfidy says:

    “I said, PLAY FREEBIRD!”

  34. Chuckles says:

    Hi Mom…I’m Home.

  35. Chuckles says:

    Quit playing Mannilow!

  36. Hootscheese says:

    “i already told you girl scouts, no samoas no deal!”

  37. Gus says:

    “taste my strange gun! it shoots colored plastic balls!!”


    “not a head-shot, but a left kidney shot”

    Oh man the last one was a shit…i know that

  38. Rendu says:


  39. Cavalier says:

    “Don’t mock the boot purse!”

  40. Vengeance says:

    Whoa is that freedom rock ???

    Whoa don’t eat the brown acid!

    Old Hippie Power

  41. Loki says:




  42. Niall Mor says:

    For the last time! These are NOT Doc Martens! See?

  43. TheNate says:

    Here’s Johnny… Doctor Johnny Fever.

    It is not a mullet!

    Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?

  44. HalLoweEn JacK says:

    1. “Liefield?! Drop that pencil! Herbert says hello.”

  45. HalLoweEn JacK says:

    WHile I think of more entires – respects to John for “THIS! is a left foot.” – awesome.

  46. HalLoweEn JacK says:

    2. “YOU! Straighten my panel frame NOW!”

  47. anjin says:

    1. a lam ding dong!

  48. HalLoweEn JacK says:

    3. “This is Avon calling, bitch.”

    (Is ‘bitch’ within the censorship restrictions? if not, please replace it with ‘scumbag’)

  49. Damien says:

    1] Get ready for a George Carlin SMACKDOWN!
    2] Do these boots make me look fat? DO THEY!?
    3] Redneck Demolitions! We…oops, wrong address. Sorry.

  50. David says:

    Bram?! BRAM?! That’s the best sound effect he can come up with? Darn you Leifeld, darn you!

  51. David says:

    Oh no! I forgot to hide my feet!

  52. Steve says:

    1. (whistling) I called the witch doctor…

    2. (singing) I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts…

    3. I told you its NOT delivery!

  53. Cory says:

    1. (Monty Python Reference) “…Its…”

    2. I believe you have my friend’s stapler. The red one.

    3. I’ll take the #4, hold the pickles, extra mayo.

    (im really surprised that THIS IS SPARTA! hasnt been used, and Id use it..if I wasnt pretty sure it’d be seen as unimaginative)

  54. Level says:

    1 It’s me, Young Stan Lee.
    2 Does this boot make my foot look big?

  55. Jester says:

    1. How’s that fer Chuck Norris?

    2. Yeah, that’s right, Liefeld. It’s a foot. Now, take it!

  56. deadeas says:

    Did I get the gum off my shoe?

  57. Timespike says:

    Pizza delivery!

  58. David says:

    Hold it! your under arrest, you have the right to remain- oh, sorry! Wring house!

  59. David says:

    Edit: ‘Wring’ should be Wrong.

  60. Hootscheese says:

    “you’ve been served, here’s you’re citation”

  61. ninjast4r says:

    “Now that I’ve got your attention, let’s talk about your long-distance calling plan!!!”


    “Where’s your bathroom? This BRAM muffin went right through me!!!”

  62. Uncle Ben says:

    “And BRANG, you’re dead.”

  63. ZOrbas th- OH YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW!!! says:

    1. WHERE’S THE RENT!!!!!



  64. Zorbas th- OH YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW!!! says:

    My WHERE’S THE RENT comment was based off the “Pearl” vids by Will Ferrel.

  65. Solander says:

    1. “We need more napkins…I’m really hungry,”

    2. “Wake up, wake up! Tomorrow is today and today is yesterday!”

    3. “This boot is so clean you could comb your hair off it!”

  66. James says:

    1. Oh YEAH! (Kool-aid man)

    2. Leggo my eggo!

    3. Can I interest you in some dictionaries?

  67. Timespike says:

    Caaable guy!

  68. Socrates says:

    1. Don’t mess with the Dog, bra!

  69. Ronin Kai says:

    #1: ( Caption “Bram” equals some one scream big guys name ) “Hey luci i am home!”

    ( yeah i know not original but still funny )

    #2: ( back panel wall thingy falls to make the “Bram noise” ) “First bad are now bad scenery from Leifeld what next, bad …. never mind its all bad.”

    #2: “Hear that? that’s my boot, its worse then this here gun”

  70. Excession says:

    All I’ve got is a bad pun.

    1. “Stop or I’ll Shoe-t!”

  71. Jeff Hebert says:

    @Excession: There are no bad puns. Or all puns are bad, one or the other.

  72. Mask says:

    1. Crackers!
    2. Not if my head of gorgeous blonde hair has anything to say about it!
    3. Get out of my tool shed!

  73. David says:

    Lets see, I’ve got a nice big grimace, bolbous muscles, and lots of pouches, what’s missing? Oh ***** I forgot to hide my feet!

  74. cory gene says:

    do these boots go with this gun

  75. Marcus says:

    HELLO SIR! May i interest you in this nice barcode scanner?