“Better late than never” is my motto when it comes to movie reviews and employment, so in order to keep the latter I shall obey the former and offer up my belated review of “Hellboy II: The Golden Army“. For those of you who, like me, have a short attention span, here’s the one-sentence summary:

The great first half of “Hellboy II” makes it worth seeing on the big screen, but the slow and disappointing second half should make you catch a matinee instead of paying full price.

The full review is after the jump.

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Last weekend I was lucky enough to find myself in San Antonio with one of my best buds, Dave, going to not just one but two super-hero movies in the same night (”Dark Knight” and “Hell-Boy II”). Life, my friends, rarely gets better than good friends, good films, and Batman kicking people in the face. Which is exactly what I’m about to do, kicking out my review of “Dark Knight” for the two of you who have yet to see it. Quick summary of the review:

1. More of a mob film that has silly outfits than a “super-hero movie”.
2. Batman rules, Superman drools (at least at the cinema).
3. Heath Ledger’s Joker: Best. Villain. Ever.
4. Get off your butt and go see it already! It’s now just below “Iron Man” on my “All-Time Great Super-Hero Movies” list.

Full review after the jump.

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Deep thought while trying to fall asleep last night*:

Robert Downey Jr. does for “Iron Man” what Johnny Depp did for “Pirates of the Caribbean”. They both turned in performances so powerful, unique, and persuasive that they transformed what were essentially entertaining but pedestrian entertainment films into that special kind of moviegoing experience that stays with you long afterward — magic. An outstanding performance elevates the part being played from a character on the screen to someone who seems real. A great performance does the same for not only all of the other actors in the film, but the film itself.

And that is what both Downey and Depp have done with their mass-market vehicles. Pretty cool.

*Yes, I think about super-hero stuff sometimes while falling asleep. Sue me.