Monthly Archives: August 2011

Yes, you’re reading that right — it’s Cow-Pie Man!

I don't want to sound like an Anglophile here, but dizzam this is some funny stuff!

While many of our Bad Costume entrants are seriously lame, Cow-Pie Man is humorously bad on purpose, in the process showing what a Bad Super Costume means better than words ever could. The underwear on the outside of the pink baggy leggings, the bowl on his head, the towel, and of course the name which, logo of a big pie of meat and horns notwithstanding, in the actual American West means a steaming pile of manure, all force me to conclude that this character is Grade A Awesome.

I tip my hat to you, British Isles, for once again proving that you are second to none when it comes to humor. I look forward to the day when an American film company will option the rights to this character, change his name, make him serious, cast Will Smith in the role, and spend a hundred million dollars to produce an overwrought, incompetent, uninteresting bit of pablum that completely loses everything fun in the original.

From the color it’s something much, much worse

(From "Fantastic Comics" number 16, 1941.)

Poll Position: Wanton destruction of cherished childhood icons

I'm apparently feeling evil today, thus:

{democracy:195}

Imagine the mighty green muscles flexing, tiny cartoon bodies flying, untold carnage ensuing ... It's World War Hulk, toon-town style! So this is your chance to vent about whatever innocent yet infernally annoying creation you've come to loathe, and fantasizing about their ultimate, disgusting, violence-filled demise. Enjoy! And let us know in comments why you want to see your chosen group mauled by Big Mean Green.

I don’t think “much” means what you think it means

(From "Fantastic Comics" number 16, 1941.)

Character Contest 70: Leo!

This week's Character Design Challenge is roaring in like a lion! Literally. Because it's time for Zodiac Contest LEO!

Yes, your challenge for this week is to design the coolest character image possible with the theme of "Leo". You might design something around a lion (duh), or something based on the astrological profile of those born under the sign, or something completely different. It's up to you so long as it in some way ties into the theme!

The person with the winning entry as selected by our expert panel (i.e. me) will win their choice of a) a portrait to go in HeroMachine 3, b) an item to go in HeroMachine 3, or c) a custom black and white "Sketch of the Day" style drawing (also by me). The rules otherwise are the same as always:

  • All entries must be in JPG or PNG form (BMPs are too big), posted to a publicly accessible website (like ImageShack, PhotoBucket, the UGO Forums, whatever);
  • Entries must be made as a comment or comments to this post, containing a link directly to the image and the character name;
  • The image cannot have been used in any previous HeroMachine character design contest;
  • Please name your files as [your name]-[character name].[file extension]. So DiCicatriz, for instance, would save his "Bayou Belle" character image as DiCicatriz-BayouBelle.png.
  • Please make the link go directly to the image (like this) and not to a hosting jump page (like this). If you see "preview" or "rotate" somewhere in the link you're probably doing it wrong.
  • All entries must be in by next Monday, when I'll choose a winner.

Good luck everyone!

Edited to Add: No more than five (5) entries per person this week, folks, so make 'em count.

Caption Contest 104 Winner!

Many thanks to everyone who entered Caption Contest 104. For your edification and enjoyment, here are the ones I thought were the funniest replacement lines for the missing dialog in this panel:

  • Joel: “You win the staring contest again. Damn your empty eye sockets!”
  • McKnight57: Whaddaya mean I don’t get to wear a Batman cape?!
  • Blue Blazer: Be honest. Does this shroud make me look fat?
  • Knighthawk: My GOD man! I don’t have a nose and that stinks!
  • Watson Bradshaw: No, my eyes are red because I AM part medical marijuana!
  • TheNate: It’s curtains for you – and drapes for me!
  • Joel: “A Legion of Doom meeting? But I haven’t a thing to wear!”
  • Myro: “Toga! Toga! Toga!”
  • Twiggyseed: What did the Joker do to me? Oh well, at least Robin’s oka-…Robin?
  • Watson Bradshaw: FOR GOD SAKE, CLOSE YOUR ROBE MAN!

And your overall winner is ... Waston Bradshaw!

I thought the dialog perfectly fit the look of horror on Swamp Thing's face and the casual, open stance of the random zombie swamp dweller. I almost went with Joel's "Legion of Doom" line instead, but ultimately decided that since Swamp Thing was never in the Legion of Doom I had to pass.

Good job everyone, and congratulations again to Watson! Let me know what you'd like for your prize and I'll get it on The List.

Eventually the Navy had to cancel fleet-wide “Burrito Night”

(From "Fantastic Comics" number 12, 1940.)

Bob finally decided a haircut was in order

(Wantonly stolen from Comically Vintage.)

Great moments in online dating profile statements

(From "Fantastic Comics" number 12, 1940.)

Power User Profile: Sutter Kaine

I can't believe Sutter Kaine hasn't won a contest yet, because the dude does some killer stuff. And he's always an entertaining read when he comments. So I thought it would be fun to get to know more about one of the "Best Who Hasn't Yet Won" crew who keep this place so much fun. Enjoy!
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